equus

Just under a year ago my best friend said something which changed my view about what was happening. I'm not going to try and quote because my memory isn't that good and I've come to understand it in my own terms since.

My situation, yours, anybodies is just one of many, life isn't trouble free, we face problems. We won't get to a problem free time, we won't get where life no longer throws curve balls at us, we won't arrive at a point of knowing all will be well from here on in - this is life, this is already our experience of life.

I've come to understand it like this:

*If we worry we will always have something to worry about.
*If we allow ourselves to be daunted we will always have something to daunt us.
*If we see ourselves as trapped there will always be something we sense holds us back.

BUT I don't have to wait for life to change so that I can change the above.

*If I accept the future will never be known I can let go of worry.
*If I know who I am will outlast the most daunting of situations then I won't have to be daunted.
*If I know sometimes I must find my own way out then I needn't feel trapped.

At work I know huge problems can be solved with clear thinking, by acknowledging barriers and keeping an eye on the target while looking for solutions. At work I see the difference between those with an attitude of defeat and those who are simply challenged to rise to the challenge. Both kinds of people maight face the same problem, to one it's unsolvable to the other it's 'just' a problem, part of life, waiting to be tackled, waiting to be a solution.

I don't always manage to apply the above to my life, I can flounder around and lose all sight ofit in emotion. But I'm learning, I'm learning to change my attitude rather than to wait for life to change.

Five

Very wise Eq - and true.

Rising to the challange is something very new to me. I have a low frustration tolerance, believing things like:

I cant do this, I cant stand it.

or

This to hard and its AWFUL.

This is changing as I LEARN each day to go with the flow more, and be excited instead of depressed by lifes difficulites...

equus

I remember one day last year when I was very aware of a choice. I was daunted, I felt completely overwhelmed, totally unequal to what seemed needed from me. That feeling was like a bottomless pit - that's where I became aware I had to choose.

Either I would fall down that pit, either I would let this bind me down so I could no longer act OR I would begin at the begining, do what I could, refuse to be daunted, get going and put the few pieces I could in the puzzle.

I had no reason not to be daunted except knowing it wouldn't help and wouldn't end. I began at the begining, kept my eye on the target and looked to find small solutions, I wasn't daunted anymore.

cloudy

I'm so glad I came on here today and got to see that. Thanks for posting it. Also where you wrote "But I don't have to wait for life to change so that I can change the above," reminds me of a reading called "The Be-Do-Have Paradigm" which I think I'll look for today as well.

ICU

Love that!!! And I'm adding it to my list of inspirational quotes. Btw Equus, you are a frequent contributor to my list!!

mallowcup

I had a similar epiphany years ago. I realizee I was waiting for life to change. One day I had this visual image of a big door. I realized that wasd the door to the life I wanted. I had to go up and open it, walk through. I realize how many years I stood at the door and waited. All any of us has to do is open it and walk through. We are one decision away from the life we want.

gelfling

Good post!!!

meli2005

Thanks for writing this, we all need to be reminded. Such good valid points!

equus

Thanks for bumping it - I needed a dose of it myself!!

Oh hell, when will practice start to make perfect???

Minx1969

Wish I knew the answer to that myself..just have to put down my crystal ball and do what I need to be done..

thanks for the reminder..I needed this because once again I was failing into the habit of feeling sorry for myself..