Trying to detach while living together
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
I just wanted to add...men who are abusive can become dangerous when the woman tries to leave. I obviously don't know this guy and/or what he's done but if the police jailed him it must have been some kind of threatening situation for someone.
Please be careful right now. Showing him printed out eviction and RO forms could just escalate into a major blowup. I'd talk to someone who is informed about these kinds of situations, but I would NOT start threatening him with eviction or other things. Just talk to someone...he is an unstable alcoholic. Be careful.
Please be careful right now. Showing him printed out eviction and RO forms could just escalate into a major blowup. I'd talk to someone who is informed about these kinds of situations, but I would NOT start threatening him with eviction or other things. Just talk to someone...he is an unstable alcoholic. Be careful.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
yeah. I learned this the hard way.
Twice I've left abusive men while they were at work. Picked up all my stuff and skeedaddled without telling them ahead of time. Both times I left town. I've known personally two women who were murdered by their abusive men as they tried to leave or just after they left, not to mention all the similar stories in the news.
Even if it doesn't end in death, it's still a dangerous time. Especially if drugs or alcohol are involved. Lots of damage happens when people are under the influence.
Twice I've left abusive men while they were at work. Picked up all my stuff and skeedaddled without telling them ahead of time. Both times I left town. I've known personally two women who were murdered by their abusive men as they tried to leave or just after they left, not to mention all the similar stories in the news.
Even if it doesn't end in death, it's still a dangerous time. Especially if drugs or alcohol are involved. Lots of damage happens when people are under the influence.
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
binini...I hear exactly what you are saying...I live near a large metropolitan center...and, not a week goes by without a similar thing happening, in the news...it is in the context of domestic violence...and, almost always, it is reported that the couple were in the midst of separation....
Once, a husband came to the large hospital, where I was working, in the emergency room, and shot his wife, who worked the night shift in the housekeeping department....so tragic.....
Once, a husband came to the large hospital, where I was working, in the emergency room, and shot his wife, who worked the night shift in the housekeeping department....so tragic.....
Member
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 681
Dandy, maybe you could share the number you gave me for the domestic violence hotline? I don't remember it, but do remember they were very kind and had lots of resources to check out.
Originally Posted by dandylion 
I think that bimini makes a very good point that needs to be remembered, by every person, when leaving an abusive partner....
Getting away Safely....safely....should always be the top priority....
Getting away Safely....safely....should always be the top priority....
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Here's the sticky post with lots of abuse help resources:
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...out-abuse.html (About Abuse)
There are two threads in there with lots of info, phone numbers, websites, attorneys, government help, domestic violence numbers, help articles, etc.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...out-abuse.html (About Abuse)
There are two threads in there with lots of info, phone numbers, websites, attorneys, government help, domestic violence numbers, help articles, etc.
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