Bedwetting
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
DesyPete, my heart hurts for all you have been through. I know in my instance as i said, it was not a wet bed but many more issues to deal with. There is pain in alcoholism, substance abuse, recovery as a whole. I dont come here to chase away a newcomer but to support others and gain support for me, which is just as important.
So i will simply say, if anyone were to pi$$ in my bed i WOULD NOT clean it or sleep there again as i belueve the poster in this thread was asking.
So i will simply say, if anyone were to pi$$ in my bed i WOULD NOT clean it or sleep there again as i belueve the poster in this thread was asking.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 31
I'd actually never associated the "sporadic incontinence" with alcohol use. Never occurred to me. It only happened three or four times over a decade. I'm glad this topic came up, though some of you apparently are not. I found this thread to be useful.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 339
This forum also allows me anonymity so I can vent or ask questions about embarrassing subjects. This is not something I would feel comfortable bringing up with many people. And I know my AH would be angry and ashamed if anyone knew. Sometimes this forum is the only place I feel I can turn.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Ca
Posts: 201
This brings back a lot of memories. XABF use to wet the bed. He wet the bed a total of 4 or 5 times when we lived together. Well those are the times I knew about. Sometimes I would see him randomly wash our bed sheets and blankets. I knew he wet the bed but he was trying to hide it. He once got up and pee'd in the corner in the middle of the night. I knew he was really drunk when that happened. I remember getting so mad. He also did mention one time he would wet himself when he would drink and laugh hard, this was right when we started to date. He would say i shouldnt hold my pee so long. I wish I would have seen the red flags but I didn't know any better.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
Yup, my XAH once peed in the closet on the shoes when we were in college. I made him clean it up and buy me new shoes LOL. I had no idea at the time that he would turn into an alcoholic. I just thought we were social college drinking. Ummmm....no.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 160
Every room in our house smells faintly of urine. Even the closets. I had to put a child-proof lock on my closet door because he would stumble in there to pee. (I still don't understand how he could confuse my suitcase with the commode.)
Keeping it simple!
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Surrey, BC
Posts: 3,282
I am surprised at how much of a common problems this is. I personally just had no idea. I think this thread has probably helped others out to realize they aren't the only ones dealing with this.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 873
Wow the memories are flooding back. Gosh I'm so glad to see I wasnt overly emotional like he use to say I was when this would happen. My neighbors would tell me he would leave the house at night and they would find him peeing in there yard. Yikes
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Indianapolis, IN
Posts: 23
Same story too...
Though my A has never peed the bed, he does regularly pee his pants, and is "messy" to say the least. There's perpetually a small mound of messed underwear in the tub (which never sees baths taken in it anyway).
Somehow it doesn't repulse me, though I'm sure it's that I've just gotten too used to the way things seem to be. eh, so it goes at any rate.
Now, in bed, he does sweat profusely, so I'm very familiar with a non-dry bed at any rate.
I will say, I frequently have those glimmers of the rational part of my brain that will always be amazed that he doesn't put 2+2 together. But, my thinking and his thinking are obviously two different thinkings.
Somehow it doesn't repulse me, though I'm sure it's that I've just gotten too used to the way things seem to be. eh, so it goes at any rate.
Now, in bed, he does sweat profusely, so I'm very familiar with a non-dry bed at any rate.
I will say, I frequently have those glimmers of the rational part of my brain that will always be amazed that he doesn't put 2+2 together. But, my thinking and his thinking are obviously two different thinkings.
Engineer Things; LOVE People
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,707
True confessions. Potty humor is enough to draw me out of the shadows.
I once peed in the sink. But I took the dishes out first. Not so much a drunk as a lazy thing. While visiting the Wimmen's 1914 era dorms at Rutgers, and for some reason, all the rest rooms were on the 4th floor and we were on the 1st floor. So it was either pee out the window, or go up 4 floors to use the ladies' room in the middle of the night . . . or the sink. Sink won.
Once pooed the bed. Was really sick, in just about any direction. Slept the rest of that illness off on the floor. But the mattress was this old, but huge super King Sized. So I dragged the mattress outdoors and let the rain wash it through. It became our super-sized South Dallas White Trash Trampoline. Kids would bounce on that for hours.
You could do that kind of stuff down there.
Funniest Story. at least to me. When STBXAW came back from Rehab for Anorexia, they were making her eat 5 meals a day. So she was farting like a dairy cow. Kids would giggle and giggle about that. At night I kept the covers down tight, otherwise it could sting the eyes. Dunno. Maybe that was when/where the cuddling stopped being so much.
I once peed in the sink. But I took the dishes out first. Not so much a drunk as a lazy thing. While visiting the Wimmen's 1914 era dorms at Rutgers, and for some reason, all the rest rooms were on the 4th floor and we were on the 1st floor. So it was either pee out the window, or go up 4 floors to use the ladies' room in the middle of the night . . . or the sink. Sink won.
Once pooed the bed. Was really sick, in just about any direction. Slept the rest of that illness off on the floor. But the mattress was this old, but huge super King Sized. So I dragged the mattress outdoors and let the rain wash it through. It became our super-sized South Dallas White Trash Trampoline. Kids would bounce on that for hours.
You could do that kind of stuff down there.Funniest Story. at least to me. When STBXAW came back from Rehab for Anorexia, they were making her eat 5 meals a day. So she was farting like a dairy cow.
Kids would giggle and giggle about that. At night I kept the covers down tight, otherwise it could sting the eyes. Dunno. Maybe that was when/where the cuddling stopped being so much. Engineer Things; LOVE People
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,707
Hey fun note for any offended A's . . . .
not trying to lecture, but just maybe see this stuff as a cautionary tale?
From the Promises . . . .
==================
"We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it."
"No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others."
===================
and while it is off topic for potty talk, my present favorite . . . .
"We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves."
PROMISES AA Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous 12 Step Promises of AA 12 Steps
ALL of His best to you.
not trying to lecture, but just maybe see this stuff as a cautionary tale?
From the Promises . . . .
==================
"We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it."
"No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others."
===================
and while it is off topic for potty talk, my present favorite . . . .
"We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves."
PROMISES AA Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous 12 Step Promises of AA 12 Steps
ALL of His best to you.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 517
I have no idea how much money I spent on pet urine clean-up stuff over the years. Bed, couch, carpet, pants, into laundry baskets, waste cans, etc. I also felt oh-so-sorry for him because he was so embarrassed the next day (and the day after the next time and the next). I put plastic over the mattress when he went out because I could not afford a mattress cover. I remember frantically checking carpet and mattress the next morning (unless he peed directly on me) and the sinking feeling when there was a wet spot. I remember buying adult diapers.
I never told anyone because I felt so sorry for him and his struggles (while also being so angry) and did not want to embarrass him. So I cleaned up, in many other ways, too, for many years, did not tell anyone, was anxiety-riddled and sad until I came here. So any A or RA telling me HERE, where I can FINALLY talk about these things and be understood, can kindly bite me. No offense.
I never told anyone because I felt so sorry for him and his struggles (while also being so angry) and did not want to embarrass him. So I cleaned up, in many other ways, too, for many years, did not tell anyone, was anxiety-riddled and sad until I came here. So any A or RA telling me HERE, where I can FINALLY talk about these things and be understood, can kindly bite me. No offense.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
