CAPTAINZING2000

The real answer lies if, it causes him problems anyway. It's not up to someone else unless, it's a spouse, boss etc. or the law

totfit

The defining characteristic in my opinion and that of many others is loss of control. If you have control over it,you are not alcoholic. This is the difference between a heavy drinker and and alcoholic. Two drinks a day is by definition a moderate drinker. This is actually considered by some medical authorities a "healthy" level. Even more healthy that abstinence. Doesn't work for me though.

Jadmack25

My mum enjoys 2 glasses of wine at night, and I join her in that when I am with her.
I also enjoy a couple of cold beers when it is has been a hot day.

Neither of us "need" a drink, nor do we want more.

My late XAH enjoyed a couple of wines, but kept going til the cask was empty. RABF also enjoyed his couple of beers, but they were only the appetisers. He couldn't stop til he had passed out, got thrown out or thrown into clink to sober up.

There is the difference.....enjoying a drink or two, as distinct from needing a drink, and being unable to stop once they have a couple.

God bless

coffeedrinker

have you come back, chimney?

is there something troublesome going on in your life?

these people on this board are very kind-hearted. they were trying to draw you out, and a couple made reference to the fact that you didn't include details, yet that didn't seem to help get more info.

this is an anonymous board. you could write a lot of stuff here and your people would never know. are you shy? fearful? is it you that you are asking about here?

we come here to heal, and to help. can we help you, today?

kittykitty

I learned something the other day, reading a post, that I cannot call someone else an alcoholic unless THEY call themselves an alcoholic. Until then, I am the only one that has a problem with their drinking. It doesn't matter if they have a "drinking problem" or not. The fact that you are even asking these questions is a sign that YOU have a problem with his drinking. You also stated that you don't have anything to do with your brother in law anymore, so what difference does it make if he has a problem or not?

And of course your "numerous times in and out of rehab" boyfriend will be more than happy to point out that someone else has a drinking problem. Taking someone else's inventory is always easier than taking your own. It's also very unhealthy, and a waste of time and energy.

I've leaned to keep the focus on myself, and keep myself happy and healthy. Worrying about other people made me crazy, and it was a never ending nightmare for me. So now, I just worry about me, instead of trying to figure out other people!

Good luck to you!

chimney

I`m amazed how some people can just answer the question that I asked(and I appreciate those who did) and others make assumptions plus add on other things that I didn`t even ask for. When someone asks a specific question, then that`s what should be answered. Let`s not make this more than it is.

kittykitty

wow

sorry i took the time to share.

Good luck to you.

Taking5

IMHO, if they need these 2drinks they are at risk.

Also assuming you do not live with these people, how do you know how much they are drinking?

suki44883

You are asking a question no one can answer with the limited amount of information provided. We don't know these people and it is unfair to expect us to know if they have a drinking problem. If you are so concerned about their lifestyle, why not ask THEM? Coming here with extremely limited information and then getting snarky when you don't like the responses you receive is ridiculous.

transformyself

I think the other folks are trying to encorporate al anon principles into this conversation and remind you that we're suppose to focus on ourselves, not the A.

That said, I wouldn't think twice about someone elses drinking, if they only had two drinks a day. They could be drinking more and hiding it. They could be doing all sorts of things on the sly. Or they could be straight up. I dont' know why anyone would drink before bed, though, because booze disrupts your sleep pattern.

Me personally, I hate booze. I think it's poisen. I've laid off that crap because if I drink, it makes me tired, screws up my digestive system and makes me severely depressed the next day--with one glass of wine! It's stupid.

coffeedrinker

i know this is futile, but i just gotta say, chimney, that the respondent's to your thread were trying to assist you - myself included. it feels crappy to have your good intentions stepped on.

thequest

I've always heard one sign is that if you can smell alcohol or sweet breath that person has probably drank too much because the body is desperate to get rid of it any way it can including your lungs/breath-any truth?

I want to know can alcohol act as a stimulant or is the person doing other things if they are hyper & drinking at the sametime. We suspect performance enhancing drugs but his person can talk 1000 miles an hour. Takes offense that you can't keep speak at his speed as well.

Dee74

Judging by your other posts thequest, it seems alcohol is only one of this persons problems.

I advise you to keep posting in the Family and Friends forum and maybe look into AlAnon or Naranon for yourself.

We simply can't help those who won't help themselves.

D

Pelican

Thequest,
I've noticed your posting in several areas of Sober Recovery. Nothing wrong with that, please continue as needed.

I will gently suggest that you begin a new thread with your current questions. Posting unrelated questions on an existing thread is considered hijacking the thread from the original posters situation.