I Did Something Really Stupid....but...
Unconditional love
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Mi
Posts: 84
Sometimes I used to just get sick to death of HIS drinking problem and I had a drink myself. I understand how you feel. There is a big difference between how an average person drinks and how an A drinks.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: my own little world
Posts: 9,071
Asking why,
I have to say as I read through this post I was laughing. Why, cause I for almost 4 years didnt drink because of my alcoholic husband. For a time I decided alcohol was the enemy.
After much clarification alcohol is not my enemy and 1 or 2 drinks does help me relax. So after abstaining and always being responsibly while my AH partied his butt off, Ive taken on a different approach. I now, if he starts by bringing it around, I drink responsibly at the Same time. I am however, even more careful about my actions at the time, but hey Im more likely to fly into a rage and control act if Im changing my life for him.
The result, he no longer drinks around me, as a matter of fact the last time he brought a bottle home and I saw it hidden, I said, you gotta share, he was more upset about sharing that he now brings nothing around me
I have to say as I read through this post I was laughing. Why, cause I for almost 4 years didnt drink because of my alcoholic husband. For a time I decided alcohol was the enemy.
After much clarification alcohol is not my enemy and 1 or 2 drinks does help me relax. So after abstaining and always being responsibly while my AH partied his butt off, Ive taken on a different approach. I now, if he starts by bringing it around, I drink responsibly at the Same time. I am however, even more careful about my actions at the time, but hey Im more likely to fly into a rage and control act if Im changing my life for him.
The result, he no longer drinks around me, as a matter of fact the last time he brought a bottle home and I saw it hidden, I said, you gotta share, he was more upset about sharing that he now brings nothing around me
Keepingmyjoy
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: NY
Posts: 328
AskingWhy, I am where you are. The selfish, self centered person we are with will drink and cause us so much irritation no matter what we do sometimes. So, we think, after everything they have done to me, why shouldn't I just do what I want? Why shouldn't I just have a beer when I want it? But, I guess you have to ask yourself, was it worth it? Did it make the point you wanted? Did it make you happy?
No judgement...just my thoughts....
No judgement...just my thoughts....
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 596
"The result, he no longer drinks around me, as a matter of fact the last time he brought a bottle home and I saw it hidden, I said, you gotta share, he was more upset about sharing that he now brings nothing around me"
ROFL!!!!! If my AH starts drinking again, I'm going to buy a bottle of cranberry juice and do the same thing, lol. I never thought of doing that. I love the conclusion some here have come up with. I can't drink in front of him because I'm an ex-smoker and equate the temptation to drink with that, at least that's how I rationalize it. And I KNOW it's easier to not smoke when I'm not around it. When I'm with one of my best friends and they are smoking, I want one SO BAD. So, I don't want to tempt my AH like that. But as for no drinking when he's actively drinking, damn, how stupid could I have been? My abstinence did nothing to stop him or even slow him down. All this time I could have had a margarita if I wanted one. But nooooo, didn't want to entice him. Well, I still really don't want him to drink, but if he does, my self-imposed halo is coming off. My mudslide will be coming.
ROFL!!!!! If my AH starts drinking again, I'm going to buy a bottle of cranberry juice and do the same thing, lol. I never thought of doing that. I love the conclusion some here have come up with. I can't drink in front of him because I'm an ex-smoker and equate the temptation to drink with that, at least that's how I rationalize it. And I KNOW it's easier to not smoke when I'm not around it. When I'm with one of my best friends and they are smoking, I want one SO BAD. So, I don't want to tempt my AH like that. But as for no drinking when he's actively drinking, damn, how stupid could I have been? My abstinence did nothing to stop him or even slow him down. All this time I could have had a margarita if I wanted one. But nooooo, didn't want to entice him. Well, I still really don't want him to drink, but if he does, my self-imposed halo is coming off. My mudslide will be coming.
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