Wascally Wabbit

I have always wondered if anyone ever video'd the alcoholic or addict in their life while they were acting stupid, and showed it to them.

Pick-a-name

Not really, but my son taped his younger sister (my daughter) earlier this year. It made an impact on her.....I hope it continures. (Their father never has displayed obviously drunk behavior around them.) It was "sobering" (no pun intended) to her father when he saw it,I think. He is no longer living with us because of his behavior when drinking,etc.

baggervance

Oh I pray no one has a tape of me.That is a dreadful thought.

Mr. Christian

Um ... nope.
It's bad enough in real life.

Rella927

Ummm have to agree with Mr. C!

I had enough phone messages that were so bad that I cannot even go there!

I did however record him with my phone one time threatening a friend of mines life! Literally!!! And ya know what sad to say with all the messages (wow nasty degrading, hurtful to the core stuff) he did hear them and it did not phase him ONE BIT! Imagine that!!

It would kind of be like trying to "fix" them by video taping, and I cannot do that I have to "fix" myself!

I would rather not go back there!!

cagefree

Oh man - I can think up about twenty 1-liners for this one!

No, I have not done it. My XABF was a grumpy, miserable dry drunk for a lot of our relationship so he was "sober" and still didn't think his emotional abuse was wrong enough to stop doing it.

People tape record themselves drunk and think they'll find it hyseterical in the morning. They don't and usually find it stupid - but they still go out again. They leave the tape recorder home.

42893

Not yet. But I am strongly considering taping his abusive behavior while drinking. In the meantime, I am an recovering alcoholic who married an active (not so bad as now) alcoholic. What can I say? I have finally surrendered to the alanon program and this time I really know I belong. I can actually hear some of the things they are telling me, and working on changing me. I am also taking my 13 & 9 year old to the next Alateen meeting to introduce them to the program.

8675309

I have never taped him but thought about it several times. I did however take some pictures of the messes that had occured as a result of his drinking and passing out. Such as an upside down plate of food on the carpet I saw when I got home from work, Sheets in the closet half hanging out in the bathroom and other strange stuff. Funny thing, when I mentioned these odd hapenings to him, he indicated that I was setting him up because he didn't remember doing any of it. Hmm must have been our friendly ghost we keep in the house.

steve11694

I showed my aw some photos of her related to alcoholism and she was speechless. It actually broke through some denial for the moment, I stress "moment"

embraced2000

sure, i thought about it.....in the earlier days when i was trying so desperately to find anything that would make a difference.

i have learned since then that if i had done this.....and i'm speaking only for myself here......i would have once again put myself in the role of superiorty by thinking i knew what could help my xah. for me, this action would have been hurtful to myself for several reasons.....first, it kept me involved in his drama and illness, second....it would have been a reinforcing action that kept me thinking i knew what was best....and third, it would have been humiliating and degrading to an already sick person who already knows how sick they really are.

this is just how it would have been in my life at that moment.

Mair

I recorded my xab on my mobile, valentines night, my 40th and when we were supposted to go to Ireland for weekend. I never told him about them i used them as tools for me, so when a weak moment comes i play them over and over till i see sense!!!

mair x

parentrecovers

i don't think i'd do it.

splendra

I accidentally took a picture of my H while high thank God it wasn't a video. I did keep the photo though...

sb0804

I havent taken a video of my AW yet but I have taken plenty of pictures. She especially enjoyed the one when she was sleeping on the toilet with a unlit cigarette in her hand and a half drank bottle of white wine.

Like steve11694 said it only made an impression for a moment.

stillsearching

I have taken pictures, it was something I was told I should do when talking with lawyers to get info on what was best for me to do. It was a way to document for child custody issues...

minnie

Do you think that showing him would make him wise up?

I nearly did. The thought made me realise what a truly sick situation I was in.

stillsearching

I really don't think it would change him at all to see the pictures, because like with everything else, there is some goofy explanation for their behavior.

minnie

It might change you, tho, to see what you are living with.

stillsearching

thanks minnie, good point!

Wascally Wabbit

I guess it would depend on the individual on whether or not it would have any impact. Some would be humilliated, some, as mentioned, would only find it funny.
I know video holds up in court. In my state if you want a divorce, you have to wait a year! Unless, you can prove alcohol abuse or substance abuse.
Then you can get divorced in 2 weeks.
Plus, if there were physical abuse, well, I'd have something to back it up in court.
Thanks for all the replies.