Janitw

I think that denial is a very powerful thing....and thats what going on in your head at the moment. It will pass just stay the course...after my XAH left the kids and I for a meth/alcoholic hooch do you believe that I actually made excuses for him in my head??? Things like: Maybe I ran him off if only I'd been more loving. Or I should have supported him more....ect, ect....what you are experiencing right now is your self conscience trying to protect your in the form of denial....we have all been where you are hun and this feeling will pass. Today I am alot stronger and they way I feel now is this: I can love him from afar and without anyone ever knowing...and if I can't get love from him I WILL have his respect.