Need help getting started
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: boston, ma
Posts: 3
Need help getting started
Hello all,
I really really need some help getting started on the road to recovery, I feel like I just cannot do it myself, and everytime I try I feel worse about it. I do not have any support, as my girlfriend and I have grown apart, but we have a daughter together and she is the main reason we are all together still. My gf has no idea the extent of my problem, as it has yet to affect work (I have my own business so it is easy to hide) I am just about financially at rock bottom, and have blown through every penny I have ever had over the last few years, and I have been working full time since I was 18. I didnt start the drugs until I was about 33, and now at 37 I'm about to have nothing left. I still have my car and house, but are just barely holding on to those by the skin of my teeth. If I screw this up and lose my car, I can kiss my income goodbye as my business requires traveling to client sites. My credit is ruined, I just feel like there is no way for me to recover. On top of that, when I do get a few bucks I will run right out and get high instead of doing the right thing. Like I said I have a daughter (10 yrs old) who means the world to me and she looks up to me so much, if my gf were to leave with her I would be devastated. Her family is from another state sh she would be taking her far away. Please help point me in the right direction, I so so want to beat this but feel like I do not have any power over it.
Thanks for listening, and hopefully replying as well.
I really really need some help getting started on the road to recovery, I feel like I just cannot do it myself, and everytime I try I feel worse about it. I do not have any support, as my girlfriend and I have grown apart, but we have a daughter together and she is the main reason we are all together still. My gf has no idea the extent of my problem, as it has yet to affect work (I have my own business so it is easy to hide) I am just about financially at rock bottom, and have blown through every penny I have ever had over the last few years, and I have been working full time since I was 18. I didnt start the drugs until I was about 33, and now at 37 I'm about to have nothing left. I still have my car and house, but are just barely holding on to those by the skin of my teeth. If I screw this up and lose my car, I can kiss my income goodbye as my business requires traveling to client sites. My credit is ruined, I just feel like there is no way for me to recover. On top of that, when I do get a few bucks I will run right out and get high instead of doing the right thing. Like I said I have a daughter (10 yrs old) who means the world to me and she looks up to me so much, if my gf were to leave with her I would be devastated. Her family is from another state sh she would be taking her far away. Please help point me in the right direction, I so so want to beat this but feel like I do not have any power over it.
Thanks for listening, and hopefully replying as well.
In Memory Of
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Connecticut.
Posts: 3,736
Hey news!
Welcome! You have made a good start by posting and recognizing that you have an addiction. I use NA and AA as my means of recovery today,and they really work. It can be tough climbing out of the hole we have dug, but it can be done. I am glad your here.
Bless, Trish
Bless, Trish
Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: waysouth
Posts: 388
Welcome to SR, badnews!
Keep posting and let us know whats goingon in your life. We're here to lend a 'cybere-ear' and support. there are a ton of resources on this site, maybe we can offer you some 'goodnews'..
Read through some of our recovery stories. the first step is admitting you have a problem, which you have done, now keep going in the right direction.
Tell us a little more about yourself, there are probably others who have been/are in similar situations who can give more specific advice.
Much Love: SS
Keep posting and let us know whats goingon in your life. We're here to lend a 'cybere-ear' and support. there are a ton of resources on this site, maybe we can offer you some 'goodnews'..
Read through some of our recovery stories. the first step is admitting you have a problem, which you have done, now keep going in the right direction.
Tell us a little more about yourself, there are probably others who have been/are in similar situations who can give more specific advice.
Much Love: SS
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,528
Hi Badnews,
You have come to a great place to find support and inspiration. You'll find lots of information here to help you. You can find your way to a better life by not using drugs today. Take small steps and keep posting.
Anna
You have come to a great place to find support and inspiration. You'll find lots of information here to help you. You can find your way to a better life by not using drugs today. Take small steps and keep posting.
Anna
No expectations!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,732
Welcome to SR, badnews!!
:hoo
:hoo
:hoo
:hoo Boston area Narcotics Anonymous
I highly recommend you try out some NA meetings. You may even be able to find some members here to meet you! I'll see if I can steer some your way. Best wishes in your recovery!!
Love and hugs,
Eddie
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: boston, ma
Posts: 3
Thanks for the replys, guys. I'm doing my best to get a grip on this. Like I said I dont really have any support at home so maybe finding a meetimg near me is the way to go,
I'll be in touch.
I'll be in touch.
In Memory Of
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Connecticut.
Posts: 3,736
Alcoholics Anonymous
http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/
http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/
No expectations!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,732
You're most welcome! Just stay in touch and let us know how things go, OK? I'm working on find someone in Boston for you to meet. May I ask, what is your gender? I only ask because it's best if you contact someone of the same sex. Best wishes always!
Love and hugs,
Eddie
Love and hugs,
Eddie
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: boston, ma
Posts: 3
That would be great, I was actually going to ask if anyone was in the Boston area, I'm male, but wouldnt be opposed to meet with anyone to get started with the meetings.
Thanks again,
Chris
Thanks again,
Chris
No expectations!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,732
When I re-read your initial post just now, I felt silly for asking your gender, although I guess you might have been female. I am female but I go by Eddie, so I try not to assume. I know a man in the Boston area. I'll try to rustle him up. In the meantime, you can still go ahead and go to some meetings, by yourself if need be. People are generally very friendly so there's nothing to be afraid of. Give 'em a try!
Love and hugs,
Eddie
Love and hugs,
Eddie
Member
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: eden prairie, mn
Posts: 51
welcome badnews, new here myself, but do have afew clean years under my belt.
i found myself in the same situation awhile back. i had my own business and was using.
damn near went bankrup! got my a** into treatment and started to attend meetings.
treatment got me afew clean days, but it was the meetings that saved me from ruin. you will meet all kinds of people, just look for someone that has what you want, Serenity was the first think that i noticed and wanted.
keep us posted
Dean
i found myself in the same situation awhile back. i had my own business and was using.
damn near went bankrup! got my a** into treatment and started to attend meetings.
treatment got me afew clean days, but it was the meetings that saved me from ruin. you will meet all kinds of people, just look for someone that has what you want, Serenity was the first think that i noticed and wanted.
keep us posted
Dean
Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Toronto, Ontario
Posts: 38
Badnews:
The goodnews is that you've found the right place. My tip is to post regularly reminding others and yourself of your journey. Posting is a good way of getting into your moment to moment, day to day way of life that will help you begin to develop good patterns. All of us here have succeeded and failed-- mostly due to the patterns that we've achieved or failed to get into. Use us if you can.
Liam
The goodnews is that you've found the right place. My tip is to post regularly reminding others and yourself of your journey. Posting is a good way of getting into your moment to moment, day to day way of life that will help you begin to develop good patterns. All of us here have succeeded and failed-- mostly due to the patterns that we've achieved or failed to get into. Use us if you can.
Liam
JstBcuz
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Long Island, NY
Posts: 82
:hugehug (((HUGS))) to U and welcome. You have made a great step by posting your views here in SR!! 2/21 was my 1 year clean date! I found this SR room before I ever found the courage to go to a face to face meeting. But the face to face meeting really help as much as this room does. 1 becasue you can see ALL different people from ALLL walks of life having the same or worse or better sisuations in life. This room is great becasue it it is here 24/7! Which helped me a lot. Babe you have your own business and a home an a GFand beautiful daughter do whats right and get clean adn sober . Do it for your self but also DO IT FOR YOUR Daughter! She is at that age that she does see and know more then you ant to think she does and the only reason I can say that is my daughter is now 13 and the drugs use was REALLY bad with both me and my husband 3years ago until Feb 20th of last year. And she now says to me different things, things that I was shocked she had noticed only becasue Ireally thought I had it all hidden so well.
Keep coming back:e03c
Keep coming back:e03c
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: The Mohave Desert
Posts: 2,306
I had to borrow this quote from a thread here...
"I am but one, with the program, I am many....."
I have found again and again that I simply can't do this thing called life by myself, especially when it comes to my addiction.
"I am but one, with the program, I am many....."
I have found again and again that I simply can't do this thing called life by myself, especially when it comes to my addiction.
NA Rocks!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Location Location
Posts: 517
Hey Badnews! 
Great to meet 'cha! I'm still pretty new here to the SR boards and I've gotta tell ya, you've made a great decision to reach out for help. These wonderful folks are amazing!
I've been off pain pills for 33 days now (thank you, Lord) and when I first made the decision to get help, everyone kept telling me to go to NA. I really didn't think it would be my thing. Plus, I had become quite reclusive because of my addiction. Well, I gave NA a shot and you know, it's one of the best choices I've ever made! I now have a HUGE network of friends and support is just a phone call away. I find myself looking sooo forward to my meetings every day, and now look for extra meetings to pick up in cities around me, just to meet new people. I feel so at home there. I come home with a great attitude and feel pumped full of strength and serenity. No matter how much I may think someone's situation is different than mine, once they share their story at a meeting, I can always ... I mean always ... find a similarity there and find some type of learning experience to leave with. It's mindblowing!
Good luck to you, friend. So glad you're here! Keep us posted.
Great to meet 'cha! I'm still pretty new here to the SR boards and I've gotta tell ya, you've made a great decision to reach out for help. These wonderful folks are amazing! I've been off pain pills for 33 days now (thank you, Lord) and when I first made the decision to get help, everyone kept telling me to go to NA. I really didn't think it would be my thing. Plus, I had become quite reclusive because of my addiction. Well, I gave NA a shot and you know, it's one of the best choices I've ever made! I now have a HUGE network of friends and support is just a phone call away. I find myself looking sooo forward to my meetings every day, and now look for extra meetings to pick up in cities around me, just to meet new people. I feel so at home there. I come home with a great attitude and feel pumped full of strength and serenity. No matter how much I may think someone's situation is different than mine, once they share their story at a meeting, I can always ... I mean always ... find a similarity there and find some type of learning experience to leave with. It's mindblowing!
Good luck to you, friend. So glad you're here! Keep us posted.
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