Nevey

Hi all,
I won't go into too much detail but fell off the wagon in major way. Got in trouble and have been in absolute despair all weekend. I couldn't face work this morning (I'm in Australia) lying in bed reading your stories and trying to feel something. I'm riding this wave, going to be tough. This incident means I have to have some very difficult honest conversations.
However, I went to my first AA meeting yesterday. Going to beginners one today. And booked in to start counselling again which I stopped going to last year because I thought had it under control.
Today I am heart broken and devastated. I'm trying to think about a month from now, a week from now and just trying to get thru this latest disaster caused by evil alcohol. After many many tries, this is it. I'm putting my life in AAs hands for now as I am completely powerless over this.
Thank you all for sharing your stories which give so much hope when things are down for others
Xx

FLCamper

I'm sorry you're having a rough time. But, it looks like you're taking some steps to get things going. How was the AA meeting? They have helped thousands over the years and work very well for a lot of people. It is a great place to start.
Keep posting. SR has been a God Send for me.

least

I hope you get it all straightened out.

Thumpalumpacus

Think about today. Make it through today sober.

Nevey

The AA meeting was great. I had thought many times in the past about going but was too scared to. It was a small meeting, just 3 of us, but it was great. I told my story and the lady there gave me a big hug (needless to say i was a bit emotional) but she gave me good advice about what are good meetings for me in my city and lots to read. Today is day 2, there will be some hurdles to overcome in the near future due to this latest incident but no matter what happens, I need to stay sober. I'm hoping to go to a lot of meetings in the coming weeks and post here

Soberwolf

Hope this helps ... welcome bk

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

Pondlady

Glad you made it to a meeting and are feeling better.

MIRecovery

I was told in early sobriety to go to meeting everyday and not drink in between meetings.

I would highly suggest getting a temporary sponsor to take you through this difficult time

Hevyn

Nevey, I remember so clearly feeling that same way when I first came here. I had begun drinking all day & was out of my mind. I couldn't imagine a way out, but being here took the sting out of it. I knew I'd never have to feel alone - even though there were many regretful things to deal with. We've all been through it - and we know you can get your life back. I'm so glad you're here.

Nevey

Thank you everyone, your words mean so much as I know you have been through this. I hope to have a sponsor soon, I'm going to try and get to as many meetings as I can. This has to be my priority, there's no other way. Thank you all again

Flawed

I was just told when I picked up my white chip that if I wanted to drink, to put it under my tongue and when it dissolved then I could have that drink Welcome, stay close and keep moving forward.

thomas11

Hope you are able to get things sorted out Nevey. I know that if I ever fell again, I would do whatever necessary to get right. Even if that meant a "life" timeout.

Anna

Nevey, I felt like Hevyn did and I just couldn't imagine how I was going to stop drinking and deal with all the messes I'd made. But, she did it, and I did it and you can too. SR has been my lifeline for years and I know that you will always find support here.

MIRecovery

One way to look at meetings is this. You have stage 4 cancer. Your doctor says you will surely die without treatment but the good news is I have a cure with a high probability of success. All you have to do is go to this treatment center and do exactly what they tell you for one hour per day.

Alcoholism and AA are no different. Alcoholism is fatal. When you look at it from this perspective you will do what you have to.

Dee74

Hi Nevey

I'm really sorry you drank and I'm sorry for whatever happened from that - but the fact you've already got yourself to a meeting and are going to more is a huge thing

You're doing something about this - and that's awesome

keep it up and I think you're gonna be ok

D

Delilah1

Hi Nevey,

I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. Sounds like you have already take. Some really positive steps to help you deal with whatever is going on.

Know there is lots of support on SR!

❤️ Delilah

tomsteve

good on ya nevey. the program of aa is an awesome thing. lots of promises(more than what read at meetings) that happen by working the steps.
heres a few words from dr bobs story that pretty much sums up how them promises materialize:
"But if you really and truly want to quit drinking liquor for good and all, and sincerely feel that you must have some help, we know that we have an answer for you. It never fails, if you go about it with one half the zeal you have been in the habit of showing when you were getting another drink."

Nevey

Oh my goodness all your kind words have brought a tear of joy (for a change!!) to my eye. I've cried a lot of sad tears this weekend but thank you all so much. I'm getting ready to head to my second AA meeting in an hour, which is specifically for beginners. I'm looking forward to it. I have some stuff to deal with from this last spectacular fall from grace, but will try take it one day at a time and stay going to meetings and close to you all. Thank you so much everyone, feeling blessed x

charliesworld

Hi Nevey. Stay close to these forums. Whatever happened from your last episode, someone on here will have experienced something similar, whether that's down to damaged personal relationships, work or trouble with the law. There are many examples of people who have come out the other end and this time you are going through now will just be a memory.

Don't succumb to any guilt or shame. They are strong emotions when you first start recovery but they are very destructive so give them as little attention as you can. Focus on moving forward.

Nevey

Thank you again all.. Came back from second meeting this evening, it was inspirational. And i spoke, even though I was a bit emotional. Was shocked to see tears in people's eyes as I spoke and the support was amazing. It was hard to listen to what others had or are going through but very inspirational what they have overcome. Back to another meeting tomorrow, and will check in here too

I hope you are all well out there, I have felt the love today x