Elisabeth888

I am at 69 days today and while I have a clear head, when I start to thinking about all of the incredibly stupid and alcoholic things I have done and the ramifications, I am overcome with fear.

I am bi-polar, on meds, in therapy and working the steps with a sponsor, so I am not just sitting around freaking out like I was before. The only thing that is helping is trying to "stay in the moment" but it is hard.

Then I watch the news and I feel like the world is coming to an end.

I just feel crazy. And like a eff up.

Smile123

You're neither crazy nor an eff up. No way. You are at 60+ days of fighting for your life, and showing such courage. You are doing everything within your power to beat this, and of course that's going to cause you a lot of anxiety. You are getting stronger and healthier every day without alcohol. It's great that the enormity of what is happening is not lost on you, so try to embrace it and know that it is worth it! And if it helps, stop watching the news! Take good care of yourself physically with nutritious food, exercise, lots of water and treat yourself sometimes! Most of all though, feel proud of yourself!

nandm

One thing I can say is that you are by no means an eff up, or crazy. You are in the early stages of recovery. Unfortunately those are the times when not only our bodies but our minds are getting adjusted to no longer having alcohol affecting them. It takes a while and it is not uncommon for people to experience depression and/or anxiety during these times. My personal opinion and experience is that people like myself who already have mental health illness' are more prone to both anxiety and depression during this time. It does not mean you are crazy but rather it means you need to be more patient with yourself and also voice your concerns with your mental health provider. It may be you need extra counseling sessions or extra medications during this recovery time. Only your doctor and you can make that determination though.

Be sure to also work on those non chemical stress reduction things that can be effective to help ease or control anxiety. Things such as yoga, meditation, eating healthy, exercise, self care such as a warm bath, massage therapy, read a positive book, etc.... I incorporate these things into my health regime along with medications and therapy. I feel it does not hurt to try everything I can to get better and treat my illness'.