speed39144

I don't want to spam but I feel I need something to push me over the edge. I 100% know how harmful drinking is and want to stop. I want nothing more than to enjoy the good nights sleep, entertaining TV and just a relaxed existence . I routinely give in to alcohol and feel sorry. I stopped for 20 mos. and was amazing. I want to jump back on that wagon.

LumenandNyx

Then don't drink.

There are other things to do.

biminiblue

The wagon is rolling past your place right now! How fortuitous!

Jump on.

Hevyn

You can get free of it again, speed. You'll probably treasure your sobriety more this time. Let's do it.

Sohard

Wow - twenty months?!?! Do you know how amazing that is? Truly spectacular. Really. What an amazing life achievement. If you can do it once, you can do it again. The will to succeed is right there, or you wouldn’t have posted this evening. You CAN do this. Just DO it. Wake up tomorrow and say DAY 1 of the rest of my life, a BETTER life. Give yourself that gift. You deserve it. You’ve earned it. With those 20 months, you damn well earned it. 💛

fini

heya speed,
if you routinely “give in”, that might be a clue that something other/more than willpower is needed.
you might know, if you’ve read here, that many of us get involved with programs, or have plans, or use tools, or all of those.
i notice you have few posts in 5 years, which is fine, of course. when i finally managed to quit, having a daily engagement with others on a similar forum and doing “daily do” sobriety stuff was the main change that was the cement to my commitment.

any day is a good day to quit!

Zevin

for what SoHard said!

Dee74

How's it going now Speed?

D

Lilac0505

I feel the same. I’ve had months here and there of sobriety and then throw it all away on a whim. It’s an endless cycle that needs to stop. I’m exhausted. We can do this! We’ve done it before right?

Philemon

😂 This tickled me. Many a true word is said in jest and none truer than this!
Hope you have decided to jump on You obviously know how to after living it for 20 months

speed39144

Thank you So Hard. I don't want to minimize anyone else's contributions but your words really hit home. I will try. tomorrow is the day!

fini

great, speed!
see you tomorrow!

MaximusD

How is it going today speed?

ballachiot

I can't wait to get to 20 months!
You've already done it, you're experienced at this, plus you know how good it feels having already been there.
Good luck for tomorrow!

Sohard

You can do this, Speed!! Just hop back up on the wagon. This is why you worked so hard for those 20 months and posted here the other day. I know the AV is screaming at you to drink, but the REAL you wants this and CAN get it. I know it’s hard at first. Really hard. But you’ve done it before. And you can do it again. And you know how much easier it gets. Everything you learned during those 20 months you still have with you. Go out and grab it! We’re cheering you on!

speed39144

Honesty is so hard Truth is I managed to go 5 days sober and it was amazing. My sleep was so refreshing. Unfortunately my job is super high pressure and I gave in tonight. Feel free to roast my weak ass lol . I will get back to sobriety no matter what

Dee74

We don't roast people here even on request

Obviously you need a better plan tho - what have you been doing to stay sober?

D

nez

No roast, but a light saute...this "Unfortunately my job is super high pressure", is an excuse. Excuses aren't good companions to take with you on a recovery journey. Leave them behind.

speed39144

My relief has been TV and movies. However thanks to Covid the new shows are hard to find. I’ve had to reach deep to find some new distractions. It used to be so easy lol.

Dee74

Maybe you need a better action plan than watching TV speed?
You can watch TV wasted - but sober folks, and folks trying to stay sober, might need a little more effort?

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...very-plan.html (What exactly is a recovery plan?)