JeffreyAK

I think for me that was a big part of it, but maybe a couple more things too. Not wanting it to be a major part of my life ever again was a critical step, and for me that was pretty early, within the first couple months. Also, not being afraid that it could become part of my life again, and not being afraid to go places or do things that might be triggering - that took longer, around about a year or maybe 18 months. Since then it's been smooth sailing coming up on 8 years now.

NYCDoglvr

I'm sober 26 years and I have none of those things, never have. I stopped drinking one day at a time: it's only TODAY I don't drink and those days simply add up. I got sober in AA, where I got a lot of helpful tools to not drink today plus support from other alcoholics. Over time I learned how to live without alcohol and how to navigate the ups and downs of life sans booze. Part of it is accepting I'm an alcoholic and that I'm powerless over alcohol .........if I pick up a drink I have no control over how much I drink or what happens.

soberlicious

You def don't need to be super-human to quit, but I do think that those who have are badasses. You mentioned monks and Marines in your OP, Vulcan, and I think there is something to that. Monks, Marines, and other such badasses have trained their brains. They understand primal desire, recognize where it comes from, and learn to override it. They don't run and hide from fear, they meet it head on. The overriding is not about willpower, it's about a shift in thinking. To me, it seems more about understanding how the mind works, and realizing that no matter what our brains are screaming at us, we do in fact have the ability to refrain from acting.

Actually we do this all the time as humans. We make decisions not to act on our desires. I didn't key my ex's truck, even though it was a fun thought. I didn't rub the bald stranger's head in line at the Walmart, even though I adore bald heads and I had a really strong urge to touch his head. I didn't tell my boss he was an idiot, even though he was. Our brains get stupid thoughts all the time...most of the time we learn to override those dumb ideas in order to keep our lives going well. For me, drinking alcohol is exactly the same. It's a f*cking dumb idea, so I will never do it again.

That's my take anyway.

Grymt

Alcohol (or no-alcohol) is no longer a major part of my life. I no longer struggle not to drink. I enjoy and engage with life in a serene mindset. For me this is a result of not drinking. In the beginning doing things like crossing the road if I see a pub ahead. Running, talking, AA three times a day etc etc etc. Slowly clarity and happiness comes. Still, last night I had a drinking dream. Perhaps the third in 15 odd years. Shrug...

skyfullofstars

I have only been sober for just under two months so maybe I am far too early in the game to be commenting on this.

However, I agree that this time it was acceptance over my problem, rather than using willpower. I tried sobriety using willpower and never lasted longer than a month. And what a miserable few weeks they were.

This time, the first month was hard, now I can be around alcohol and people drinking easily. I avoid bars and pubs now, I will only go if it is a special occasion.

For me, it was hours and hours of reading about alcohol and the damage it does to people's mental and physical health. It made me despise alcohol and see it for the poison it truly is. I still get cravings, but I play the tape forward, and I love my new, sober life too much to go back to my life as a drunken trainwreck.

I recommended reading 'Kick The Drink' - Jason Vale and 'This Naked Mind' - Annie Grace. Both of them are amazing at shattering beliefs we have about alcohol.

I see alcohol as a toxic ex boyfriend. He wooed and sweet-talked me then turned abusive. Whenever I tried to cut him off he would charm his way back into my life, erode my worth and confidence so I only relied on him. Then the abuse would start again. Surrendering meant seeing him in his true colours. The thing about seeing people for who they really are, rose glasses firmly off, is you can never go back to seeing the mask.

Now I know how damaging and manipulative booze is, I cannot see it any other way. I am no longer one of his victims, I am one of his survivors. If he messages me with his sweet words then I am strong enough to ignore them, no matter how lonely I feel. Gradually the messages will lessen and you are slowly getting stronger.

You don't have to be super-human, you just have to WANT to be free. It is the hardest thing you will ever do, but it is worth it