DAB

Hey, I would like some feedback about my situation.

Probably like most of us here, I have had an addiction to mostly weed and booze with a few psychedelics here and there.

I quit weed first when synthetic weed came on the scene and replaced it with that for about a year. Then I quit drinking a few months after the synthetic weed was banned in my state.

I started going to AA. About four years into my sobriety I was diagnosed with colorectal cancer. I had the radiation, surgery, and chemo. I stayed clean through all of it. Then one night, I went out with a couple of friends to watch another friend’s band play at a bar. While I was there one of my friends offered me some weed. I took it to the bathroom but couldn’t get myself to do it. It was just a few pinches in the corner of the bag, so he said I could just keep it.

Since my chemo I have suffered from bad neuropathy in my feet, and I have various other stomach pains and issues since my surgery. I felt that this might help with some of these symptoms.

I told my wife about the marijuana and said that I would like to do it with her ( she suffers from other issues that I thought it might help).

After careful consideration she agreed. We had enough to use it a couple of weekends in a row. That was the last time I used it, about a year and a half ago until recently.

I was going to see my favorite band with the brother of the friend that gave me the weed before. He also gave me some for the concert and let me keep what was left.

About a week after I ran out, I went to see my friends band again with the same friend as before. He gave me some again.

It does help greatly with my symptoms and makes me a happy person.

The problem is, I feel like these gifts have been blessings to me at times when I needed it the most. However, I don’t want to fall into a habit of dependency on it. I also don’t want to jeopardize my sobriety. My wife is very concerned.

Please respond with any and all thoughts on this. Sorry it is so long winded.

Lpg

Hey

Sorry to hear about your bad times with illness I hope that's behind you and your doing better.

So funny you posted I was just coming here to ask advice on weed, but my problem is I replaced my alcohol abuse withweed abuse, my honest opinion... Don't start! I'm trying to quit right now and I really regret taking it up in the first place.

Iv gave myself another thing to tackle, I will do it but I just wish I hadn't started in the first place. I'm on day 2 no weed and I can't sleep, iv relied so heavily on it I fear I may have many sleepless nights to come.

All the best

ScottFromWI

I'd personally discuss it with your doctor and see what they think. There might be something else you can do that will help as much or more as smoking weed that has less of a chance to become addictive. I'm sure your friend was trying to be helpful, but there's a difference between getting prescribed medicinal THC and getting a baggie from your bud at the bar.

At the end of the day though, the decision is really up to you. I personally would not consider myself "sober" if I was smoking pot as I abused it in the past. But I've also never had cancer or neuropathy so I am likely not qualified to speak to your personal situation.

DAB

Hey Lpg, do you realize your post on my thread was number 420?
Coincidence? I think not.

MindfulMan

Lol.

Said the user named Dab!

Dee74

I agree with Scott - talk to your Dr...if you've had problems with weed before, I think self medicating with that same substance in the same way is too high risk to take.

and..you can enjoy bands even more without the weed, trust me

D

BullDog777

I used to abuse pain killers before I got sober.

Last year, I had some kidney stones. It was the worst pain I've ever been in. I was prescribed painkillers for the pain and I gave them to my wife so i wouldn't abuse them, but I did take them. I'm 2 years and some change sober.

Did I relapse? Not a chance. And I can say that with full conviction and I could stand before my God and believe it with every part of my moral fiber.

I'm not going to tell you if you messed up or not. Really...it's not for anyone but you to say. I've never had cancer and I hope I never do. That being said, if you were having legitimate issues that were helped by weed, then imo...you're still sober. It wasn't recreational, it was medicinal.

The drug companies don't invest enough research and the laws aren't such yet, that it's widely accepted as a method of treatment everywhere. I think it should be. But then again, how many drug companies would suffer at the hands of THC. Probably too many which is why it's still illegal in most red states.

Only you can answer these questions brother. You'll never get any judgement out of me.

I'm glad you're well, and I hope everything stays that way.

Cosima11

I deal with sleep issues and insomnia was one of my biggest struggles in early sobriety. I actually smoked weed before I ever started drinking so I know my own history with it and my inclination to abuse it. However, and I feel I may be lit on fire for voicing my opinion here but I'll say it anyway.. I have smoked weed a handful of times since quitting drinking and have not become dependent on it. A friend gave me enough for a couple bowls many months ago and I still haven't run out, if that's any indication of how much or often I smoke. I had to make the conscious choice that I will not depend on it for sleep, depend on it as a mood stabilizer, go out of my way to seek it out, get caught up in "social smoking", etc. etc.

I'm not sure when or if the medicinal value of cannabis will ever be recognized in mainstream society, despite its growing legality. For some (and everyone reacts differently) weed is actually used to treat anxiety. For myself personally I think it's a lot less risky than taking prescribed benzos, for example. Either way I see it as temporary band aid rather than a long term solution, hence the making a conscious choice to not depend on it.

As for it leading back to drinking.. I think it depends on your individual experiences and associations. I know for example, if I ever did cocaine there's a 100% chance that even if I didn't drink, the mental obsession would return. For whatever reason(s) that's not the case with weed. I think if at any time or for any reason you feel you're either depending on it to keep you from drinking, or it's leading to a place where you'd consider drinking, then it's best to not even mess with it.

fini

DAB,
so much depends on context and intention.
if you wanted to use it for pain meds, there are other painmeds. as you know. or you could likely get it prescribed in a form that would not make you "happy".
since you already mentioned "happy" , would it be fair to suggest that this is a huge part of this parcel?
check your motives, check your desire, and deep down you will know.
ultimately, no input fom others will help you there.

MindfulMan

One word. Soberchella. Was AMAZING. Better than "regular" Coachella!

Lpg

Lol freaky.
Weed is a funny one right now as it does have many pros medically but also for people with addictions I do think it's a risky one to start using.
I can understand with your medical reasons why your interested.
My reasons not even on the same radar but I used it to begin with for anxiety and sleep problems I got to a point I was desperate and I'd gave up booze so thought it would be a safe option because of all the twoing and frowing about legalising it and reading up on all the medical benefits (I still am amazed at the benefits)
2 years later I have sat on down in tears ashamed of myself because it now controls my life and things I do, just like booze did. And what's worse about it is because it hasn't significant damage to my life like booze did,
It pulls me in deeper. Smoking more £, chasing dealers around, rushing home from plans to smoke, trying to arrange my day so I can smoke earlier and earlier, getting angry if I can't smoke. Oh and iv lost interest in my job completely, I hate going to work with a passion I used to love my job. Maybe it doesn't sound so bad but I can promise you it feels it.

Also like others have said I would speak with you Dr they will point you in the right direction, I know my friend uses capsules of medical cdb oil for pain management and I think it really helps her, there's something different to that than smoking it. No one here can give you a right or wrong answer, the only person who is medically fit to deem it will be the Dr. Hope you get the solution you need and your pain eases.

Lpg

Eddiebuckle

This may seem trivial, but I would consider the verb tense used to describe your addiction in the second sentence. "Have had" would imply that you no longer do have.

Ladysadie

For what it's worth, my partner has been dealing with brain cancer with chemo and radiation, and resulting nausea and neuropathy. He belongs to a tumor forum and many people suffering report good results with the CBD (non THC) so he tried it and found it helpful. Consider discussing this with your doctor? It shouldn't wake up your beast but could give you relief providing your doc approves.

iew101

For me pot and drinking were completely different. Different evening types, different snacks and a different lifestyle. I still used both, unknowingly at first with pot and knowingly with alcohol, to deal with mental health issues.

For the times when I was doing both, I would typically use pot when I was hung over or on days I wasn’t drinking. Once in a great while I would smoke a little bit and then go to the bar. But if I smoked after drinking I would usually throw up. So for me personally they are not intertwined, But I clearly cannot speak for anybody else’s experiences.

NYCDoglvr

If a doctor prescribes medical marijuana it's one thing, but self-medicating is just that. You can't be high and sober at the same time. I suggest seeing a doctor.

DAB

While I was going through different phases of my cancer treatment, my wife and I did ask my oncologist about him prescribing medical marijuana. It fairly recently became legal in my state and the restrictions are very stringent. My oncologist said that he is neither for or against it’s use but under state law he could not prescribe it for me because I didn’t meet certain guidelines. He actually suggested that if I thought it would help, I should get it from someone I know if I know anyone. He said it’s a lot cheaper than getting through the state.

fini

i don't see how your last post addresses the issue you raised in your original one, DAB?

ScottFromWI

There's a lot you could read into his suggestion. For one thing it's illegal for him to make that suggestion. It would also likely be the end of his career if the hospital he works for ever found out that he was recommending his patients seek illicit/illegal drugs outside of their policies.

Also, did you ask him what "guidelines" you did not meet? Generally guidelines are there for a reason. You could always get a second opinion too.

I think the bottom line here is that we cannot, and will not recommend illicit use of any drug as we are a recovery forum. I'm not suggesting that you may not benefit from medicinal marijuana, but remember that we are a community of recovery, and by rule we cannot and will not promote any drug use.

PhoenixJ

The use of medical marij. is well documented as having therapeutic results with pain....perhaps seek an outside professional opinion- to set your mind at ease.

NYCDoglvr

Some doctors prescribe it, others don't feel comfortable doing it so I suggest finding someone.