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Tell me the tricks

Old 02-19-2018, 10:51 PM
  # 41 (permalink)  
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That's not true in general, though sometimes it might be true. For every story like that, there are probably 3 more stories from people who were ostracized, discriminated against, sidetracked, or let go for having been alcohol addicts. That's why AA stands for Alcoholics Anonymous, and why so many people carefully guard their recovery. The reality is, most people think alcoholism equates to moral failings, unchecked hedonism, and unreliability, since every former alcoholic is one drink away from sliding back down the hole. It's often stigmatizing, not always but often.
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Old 02-20-2018, 05:36 AM
  # 42 (permalink)  
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One of the tricks that helped me early on was just taking enormous pride in every single sober day, even when it felt like I was crawling across the finish line. Keep scratching out those early sober days whatever it takes, keep collecting weapons for your sobriety arsenal, keep working to improve your thinking. And keep logging onto SR, posting and reading, and have faith that good things are waiting ahead!
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Old 02-20-2018, 05:39 PM
  # 43 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by JeffreyAK View Post
That's not true in general, though sometimes it might be true. For every story like that, there are probably 3 more stories from people who were ostracized, discriminated against, sidetracked, or let go for having been alcohol addicts. That's why AA stands for Alcoholics Anonymous, and why so many people carefully guard their recovery. The reality is, most people think alcoholism equates to moral failings, unchecked hedonism, and unreliability, since every former alcoholic is one drink away from sliding back down the hole. It's often stigmatizing, not always but often.

^^^^^
That!!!! Thank you for keeping it real Jeff
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Old 02-20-2018, 08:37 PM
  # 44 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by iew101 View Post
Hi- I was curious how long it took you to feel straightened out. I’m on round 2 (round 1 was 5 months). Only at 11 days now, but I can’t go back. Physical stuff was picking up (heart racing, indigestion, anxiety etc) too much to even seriously contemplate drinking again. Not to mention the consecutive days and amounts consumed were on the rise.
Three months of feeling awful. Yeah I could work, I could exercise, I did my thing....but I felt completely off all the time. A general low feeling of anxiety, sadness, extreme fatigue, intense sugar cravings, and intermittently feeling like I wasn't in my own skin, or as if every morning I woke up and had to wear someone else's clothes. I was gaining weight, I was sleeping a lot, I was lying in bed all the time, I had no libido and went through the motions with the husband, i had trouble collecting my thoughts, I stumbled backwards a lot and at work I worried people thought I was under the influence, I was irritable, and every single day I had to tell myself how temporary it all was.

Because it was. I was days from month 4 when suddenly...I recognized myself again. I felt like I fit back into my brain and into my life again. It wasn't totally over but it was like one day I realized....I'm better. It was 4 months.

I've heard that getting better is a different timeline for everyone but there is some research to back up getting past 90 days.

Hang in there.
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Old 02-22-2018, 06:25 PM
  # 45 (permalink)  
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What you call tricks I might call tools. So, my tools are: talking to others, being honest, telling others when I'm struggling and when I am succeeding, accepting my illness is something that I need to choose to treat every day, attending AA meetings, doing daily readings, attending to my spiritual and emotional and physical needs (eating well, exercising, checking in with my trainer, getting massages, going to therapy, meditating). You can't outsmart this, you've just gotta take action. Keep working at it!
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Old 02-23-2018, 03:34 AM
  # 46 (permalink)  
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I second what AnonSara said - I think of them as recovery "tools" that I've picked up and use as needed.

The biggest for me is reaching out to others for support, i.e. loved ones or my sponsor. Not just for when I'm craving alcohol, but in general when I'm feeling anxious or depressed about something, because letting that fester is usually what leads me to relapse.

I used to bottle up my negative emotions, because that's what I'd done my entire life. UNlearning that has been absolutely crucial to my recovery.
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Old 02-23-2018, 03:41 AM
  # 47 (permalink)  
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Like Least, practicing daily gratitude is a HUGE part of my recovery. I'm grateful for the brand new life that recovery has given me. It was literally a life or death decision that I made nearly 9 years ago. If I would not have changed, I'm certain I would be dead by now. And for that, I'm grateful.
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Old 02-28-2018, 02:03 PM
  # 48 (permalink)  
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We're delighted you're here with us, angel.

Your feelings are typical for many "high bottom drunks".

I would probably have qualified as being a "high bottom drunk" by the standards of many people when I got sober, but it sure didn't seem so from my perspective.

I didn't feel like I was on top of much of anything at the time, even though I was a young attorney with an excellent law firm, lived in a nice neighborhood and drove a fine automobile.

But none of that (the career, the house, the car, etc.) would have lasted if I had continued to drink.

I certainly didn't want to go to AA either.

But I made a decision that I couldn't take my chronic alcoholism any longer and I finally became willing to ask for help.

I know full well that my participation in AA would be a part of the treatment center I matriculated into.

But I was desperate and asked for help, notwithstanding that reality.

They told me to be open-minded about AA, and I was, albeit with the greatest of misgivings.

I was so afraid of drinking again and losing everything that I kept on going to AA when I graduated from the treatment center.

And a funny thing happened.

At one of the first meetings outside of treatment I attended, I talked to one of my firm's largest clients.

And I just kept on coming back to AA until I genuinely liked it and the friendships I forged at meetings, sometimes with people who were "successful" in their careers and some who were not.

All of us in AA have suffered from the same seemingly hopeless condition of mind and body that I did (and still do).

That was 1988, and I have continued to participate in AA and work the 12 Steps ever since without a relapse.

I give the credit for my sobriety to God and to AA, in that order.

Through God and AA, I have conquered long-held fears and mental and emotional health challenges (that used to defeat me when I drank).

I write about recovery in my profession's newsletters and magazines.

I speak at law schools and groups of lawyers and judges about my profession's resources for members of my profession who suffer from substance abuse and other mental health disorders.

People routinely call me to help for themselves with their own drinking problems or for others they love who suffer from alcoholism.

I am on a first name basis with people at the very highest levels of business, government, education and my profession in the state where I live.

And most of them know I am in recovery, I might add.

I think most people regard me as successful, although it's not something I reflect about.

I answer to God and not to the rest of the world generally.

My new life all started for me the day I asked for help and walked into a treatment center.

And for all of these blessings (most importantly, my sobriety), I credit God and AA.

I feel rather unworthy and undeserving.

I hope that you check your ego at the door and come on in and join us.

You never know whom you may meet there.

We're all there for the same reason.
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Old 03-02-2018, 10:55 AM
  # 49 (permalink)  
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Great post CAH.

Have never been to AA but thinking about working the steps after reading posts like your.

I think that Angel really meant "tools" rather than tricks and we all need to be careful not to jump on words. The internet always seems so black and white.

But it is about action!
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Old 03-04-2018, 02:35 PM
  # 50 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Dropsie View Post
Great post CAH.

Have never been to AA but thinking about working the steps after reading posts like your.

I think that Angel really meant "tools" rather than tricks and we all need to be careful not to jump on words. The internet always seems so black and white.

But it is about action!
I agree.

I hope I didn't belittle the term.

For people like me, I have needed slogans, acronyms, etc.

I admire Angel (and others like her or him) for reaching out for help.
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Old 03-06-2018, 03:14 AM
  # 51 (permalink)  
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How are you Angel?
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