Mental Gymnastics...Again
non-drinker
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 13,845
I like the term "surrender" for what I experienced. I went thru nearly 30 years of those "mental gymnastics" and they must've worked, because my addiction was in top flight shape. Me on the other hand, I was literally dying, both mentally and physically. Once I made the decision that alcohol had finally won, that's the moment I waved the white flag and decided the ONLY way for me to get better was to stop, no matter the circumstances. I felt like the weight of the world was lifted from my shoulders. That was 8 and a half years ago. Today, life still throws me curve balls, but EVERY facet of my life is better because of that one moment when I made the choice to surrender.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 1,283
Originally Posted by FormerBeerLover 
I like the term "surrender" for what I experienced. I went thru nearly 30 years of those "mental gymnastics" and they must've worked, because my addiction was in top flight shape. Me on the other hand, I was literally dying, both mentally and physically. Once I made the decision that alcohol had finally won, that's the moment I waved the white flag and decided the ONLY way for me to get better was to stop, no matter the circumstances. I felt like the weight of the world was lifted from my shoulders. That was 8 and a half years ago. Today, life still throws me curve balls, but EVERY facet of my life is better because of that one moment when I made the choice to surrender.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by Sohard
I'm on my way to a Christmas lunch. Just wondering what everyone's thoughts are on a non-alcoholic Bloody Mary?
non-drinker
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 13,845
Personally, I'd stay away from any of the "virgin" drinks that mimic cocktails. Beer was my poison of choice and no way in hell I'd ever have an N.A. beer. First off, I drank beer to get drunk. Secondly, I think it could lead to a very slippery slope, so why even chance it. I'm perfectly happy sticking with soda and/or water these days.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: West Tn
Posts: 3,043
Originally Posted by FormerBeerLover
Personally, I'd stay away from any of the "virgin" drinks that mimic cocktails. Beer was my poison of choice and no way in hell I'd ever have an N.A. beer. First off, I drank beer to get drunk. Secondly, I think it could lead to a very slippery slope, so why even chance it. I'm perfectly happy sticking with soda and/or water these days.
I liked the taste of beer and of bourbon.
I liked the warmth they produced going down my throat.
But i have made a sacrifice of these pleasures to get and stay sober.
What a trade-off - giving up some beverages i liked very much and the euphoria (and multitude of problems they produced) in exchange for a normal life which includes genuine friendships, a wife and career i love dearly, a modicum of professional respect, and the certainty of God's existence in my life on a daily basis.
I wouldn't trade places with anyone.
So, I don't ponder beer, bourbon and the other toxins i consumed on a daily basis.
I don't want to get near them and romance them.
I would rather focus on the blessings my sobriety has given me.
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Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 1,283
My mental gymnastics slowed down, for sure. And, at points, I actually stop thinking about alcohol entirely (about this site, AVRT, sobriety, moderation, etc.). It's like I feel like a normal person for a bit not consumed by this reality or topic anymore. But, the weirdest thing is sometimes (like just a minute ago) I literally forget I've quit drinking and think "hey! A glass of wine would be really, really nice!" and I start to think I should get to the store. But, then I remember. And it's SUCH a disappointment. SUCH a damn disappointment. I feel like when I have those thoughts pop into my mind, surprising me, it must be what non-alcoloics feel like who get a hankering for a glass of wine every so often...but they get to carry it through. It's just a big bummer I can't indulge just a BIT like those people.
I'm just jealous. Non-alcoholics get not crave liquor and yet indulge when they want. While my cravings are getting lighter, I'll never get to indulge even if they disappear.
Yep, this post was just for me to complain and get it out of my system. Thanks for listening.
I'm just jealous. Non-alcoholics get not crave liquor and yet indulge when they want. While my cravings are getting lighter, I'll never get to indulge even if they disappear.
Yep, this post was just for me to complain and get it out of my system. Thanks for listening.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
Sohard,
it's good to get the thoughts out and to be able to see them in black on white.
that way, you can dissect them and see them for what they are.
you can see how you view drinking as a positive in many different ways and being sober as a most unfortunate and unfair deprivation.
when you were desperate to be sober ( were you?) , how did you see it?
and the frehness of that wears off over time, or sometimes the memory/ knowledge of that can seemingly disappear.
which is one reason to follow a plan no matter how you feel. feelings and thoughts can change easily and are not terifically reliable guides for actions
it's good to get the thoughts out and to be able to see them in black on white.
that way, you can dissect them and see them for what they are.
you can see how you view drinking as a positive in many different ways and being sober as a most unfortunate and unfair deprivation.
when you were desperate to be sober ( were you?) , how did you see it?
and the frehness of that wears off over time, or sometimes the memory/ knowledge of that can seemingly disappear.
which is one reason to follow a plan no matter how you feel. feelings and thoughts can change easily and are not terifically reliable guides for actions
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 1,283
Originally Posted by fini
Sohard,
it's good to get the thoughts out and to be able to see them in black on white.
that way, you can dissect them and see them for what they are.
you can see how you view drinking as a positive in many different ways and being sober as a most unfortunate and unfair deprivation.
when you were desperate to be sober ( were you?) , how did you see it?
and the frehness of that wears off over time, or sometimes the memory/ knowledge of that can seemingly disappear.
which is one reason to follow a plan no matter how you feel. feelings and thoughts can change easily and are not terifically reliable guides for actions
it's good to get the thoughts out and to be able to see them in black on white.
that way, you can dissect them and see them for what they are.
you can see how you view drinking as a positive in many different ways and being sober as a most unfortunate and unfair deprivation.
when you were desperate to be sober ( were you?) , how did you see it?
and the frehness of that wears off over time, or sometimes the memory/ knowledge of that can seemingly disappear.
which is one reason to follow a plan no matter how you feel. feelings and thoughts can change easily and are not terifically reliable guides for actions
Member
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 3,027
Desperation to drink is a narrow existence. It filters out everything, all of life in its vast, wondrous, terrible and beautiful glory. It takes you down to just a beverage.
Stay sober long enough to relegate alcohol to where it belongs, the dusty backseat of your mind.
If its becoming too important, so important that you are desperate for it, that's not a normal human state of being. Stay sober so you can begin to live life again.
Stay sober long enough to relegate alcohol to where it belongs, the dusty backseat of your mind.
If its becoming too important, so important that you are desperate for it, that's not a normal human state of being. Stay sober so you can begin to live life again.
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