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Drunk emotions vs. Sober emotions

Old 01-09-2017, 04:30 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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I have noticed some of the paranoia and obsessions I had before, but I am able to quiet the thoughts fairly easily, whereas while drinking they were out of control.
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Old 01-09-2017, 10:22 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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I was definitely much more emotional when drinking. Things would irritate me more easily, and I would sometimes make something small into something bigger than it needed to be (it probably didn't need to be anything at all!)

I feel a sense of calm sober, that I never felt when drinking.
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Old 01-10-2017, 03:23 PM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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I've been dry for nearly 4 years now and I have noticed I am almost completely without emotion. I can do happy and laugh and excited if the occasion calls for it but there seems to be something missing.

I haven't been on here for quite some time but I came on today to find a post exactly like this one. Good to know I am not the only one. Its good to be so calm about everything, but sometimes I do find myself to resemble something of a rock.

My partner of 3 and a half years sometimes says I would show more emotion and be a bit more expressive. I think it upsets her a bit because I said once I used up all my emotions when I was drinking. Obviously for her she sees this as though its not her I love, but a previous partner. Its an awkward one really.

To the OP, good job on stopping the poison. Don't let what you see in your partner deter you from your goals and perhaps approach the subject when she is sober also. In a mutual environment and not at home.
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Old 01-10-2017, 03:42 PM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Gottalife View Post
In AA we talk about emotional sobriety. It is one of the main goals of the programme and doesn't automatically come from stopping drinking. In fact, the emotional instability can get a lot worse in sobriety unless the alcoholism is treated. Bill W wrote a pamphlet on the subject called Emotional Sobriety. He was having problems at over twenty years, and he present s his solution in this pamphlet.

A while back I saw a guy at a meeting, been sober thirty years he said, but his emotional state was exotremely bad. Dry drunk doesn't begin to describe it. He had got married just over a week beforehand, went on the honeymoon, and the wife had kicked him out before they even got home. He was howling about how hard done by he was and what an unreasonable woman his wife was. He got to talk about all this by interrupting the person sharing and ignoring please from the chair for him to wait his turn. His sad tale was so important we all had to hear it immediately. Then he left.

Thirty years without a drink, and less emotional stability than most newcomers. Just stopping drinking is not always the total solution.
I feel bad for that guy. That's not recovery. If that's how a person is going to act and feel sober, may as well never have stopped drinking if you ask me.
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Old 01-10-2017, 05:32 PM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by hibbsy23 View Post
My partner of 3 and a half years sometimes says I would show more emotion and be a bit more expressive. I think it upsets her a bit because I said once I used up all my emotions when I was drinking. Obviously for her she sees this as though its not her I love, but a previous partner. Its an awkward one really.
If I have to be a little bit less expressive to still be alive, then I'm okay with it! People liked me more when I was drinking, because I was livelier and more social, but that wasn't really me. I'm not an overly emotional or expressive person, and I've come to find new friends in my sobriety who are okay with that. I still feel things, and sometimes I feel things very deeply, I just don't show it.
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Old 01-10-2017, 06:41 PM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by site1Q84 View Post
People liked me more when I was drinking, because I was livelier and more social,

Same here - but the only people in my life that say this are all heavy drinkers themselves.
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