What's your progression today?

Old 11-19-2016, 10:36 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
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What's your progression today?

Most of us are astutely aware of the progressive debilitating nature of continuing to drink. It get's worse, never better for friends like us. Certainly my misery, self loathing and destructive path progressed rapidly the last few years of my career.

I think it's worthwhile to point out to newcomers that recovery is also progressive. If I view drinking as a swing of the pendulum in one direction, recovery is a swing in the other direction.

However, getting better doesn't happen all at once. For me and I hear from others recovery is like an upward trending line with upward/downward zig zags along the path. It dawned on me that this positive trend is linked to the progression of my reality. As time passes, I find a clearer more acute reality. That may be good, bad or both at times - but more finely tuned. I suppose not fuzzy eyed, misty viewing. When I can start to see clearly, I am capable of making choices with positive outcomes - I live life less like the game of whack-a-mole; more deliberately/more engaged.

For the newly sober, stick with it! Given choices of progressing into an alcoholic, downward spiral or progressing in reality, hope and potentially a lot less misery it's really pretty simple.

What's your progression today!?!
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Old 11-19-2016, 10:45 AM
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My progression today is that I know I have choices. I choose not to drink. I choose to stand up for myself and care about my own well-being. Recovery to me today is about learning to love myself and take care of my own life. When I was drinking I had no control over my own life. Playing piano has been a big part of my recovery. Also staying out of relationships for a while so I can figure out who I really am.

It is difficult sometimes but I am finally beginning to respect myself.
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Old 11-19-2016, 11:07 AM
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When I was in treatment I had this realization: My downward spiral into addiction and all the misery it brings was a step by step, predictable decline. Each time I choose to go back to that predictable spiral by drinking, I found I could decline just a little further each time. So basically I was assured continued misery if I drank. It dawned on me that if this is true (and it is) that the opposite must be true as well. That if I followed the upward ascension of recovery, step by step, day by day, I would progress into a life without active addiction and all the misery it brings. That I would learn to live life on life's terms and cope with both the successes and failures of day to day living without alcohol. That I could be like any other recovering alcoholic-happy, joyous and free.

Today I am learning to have faith in the fact that if I do what others have done before me, I will recover. I may not know exactly what that looks like, but I have faith that I will get there. I know for darn sure if I drink I will be back in he!!.
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Old 11-19-2016, 11:49 AM
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Well said, frick. Makes total sense to me and so far, it's how recovery is going for me. I look forward to the consistent, cumulative progression ahead.

I notice the dips and peaks in my recovery, for sure. I was dx with BPD a year before I quit drinking. While the symptoms of mine were nearly identical to that of a raging alcoholic (me), and I am a BB-type case of believing that once alcohol was removed so too were the other "problems," my baseline personality is being consistently revealed. It is much more moderate, compartment-a-lizable, steady and such than "we all thought" or than BPD entails, yet I am definitely a more "disturb-able" person than, say, my even keel boyfriend.

I have noticed - here at just 9mo yesterday- that there have been certain marks where temperamental issues have popped up for a week or so. Around 100 days, when a lot else seemed to shift (for the good) then 6 mo, then in the past couple of weeks. I am learning to feel, and accept where I am, when I am there.

Recognizing the pending turbulence and stemming it or reigning it in more quickly, and other ways to manage are my focus. There have also been a number of situations lately where I have recognized myself reflexively applying program principles in response to what was happening. That feels great.

Good topic.
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Old 11-19-2016, 03:19 PM
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Most of my recovery has been about fixing me.

Not drinking and drugging was chapter one for me - vital and fundamental but simply the first step on a long journey

I'm certainly a different person that I was ten years ago.
I feel more rounded, more secure, more at peace

It took me a while to get there - it's a process - and I'm still not a saint by any stretch of the imagination...but room for improvement is no bad thing...something to strive for

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Old 11-19-2016, 03:25 PM
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A huge reason I stay sober is so I can take the best care of my dogs and cats. Petting them, watching them, walking the dogs, all boost my sobriety and make it stronger.
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Old 11-19-2016, 04:29 PM
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No pain, no gain has been my path. I am not clear minded that I can always make the right choices through a clear view, I tend to trust the God of my understanding and my behaviour seems to flow naturally from that, as have all the changes in me. I can't think of one single change I have engineered myself, yet I am a totally different person today.

Free choice is something I have when I am, for example, choosing a color to paint my house. My choices in life don't seem to be free, there is always a consequence. I am constantly seeking the "right" thought or action, not choosing between the right and wring courses. If I get it wrong, pain is the result. Likewise with drinking. I lost the power of choice long ago, and I never got it back.

Today the thought of drinking fills me with revulsion. I would rather die than drink again. Thankfully there is no need to make choices like that, alcohol is not a part of my new life, the concept of choice in that respect is totally redundant.
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