My Mind Playing Tricks on Me
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 95
My Mind Playing Tricks on Me
The Geto Boys did a song back in the day called "My Mind Playing Tricks on Me." That sums up what's been going on the last few days with me and my nearly 8 weeks of sobriety. lol
I'm feeling good, feeling more confident, realizing that I have options in life and that my life is far from over. This confidence I am feeling is a familiar confidence, and it is one that I sought to squash with the alcohol to keep myself from feeling too good, to keep myself in check as my "realist" (aka negative) drinking self used to say.
It's weird feeling good without being drunk or high...
I'm feeling good, feeling more confident, realizing that I have options in life and that my life is far from over. This confidence I am feeling is a familiar confidence, and it is one that I sought to squash with the alcohol to keep myself from feeling too good, to keep myself in check as my "realist" (aka negative) drinking self used to say.
It's weird feeling good without being drunk or high...
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 95
Been nearly 4 months and things are getting better.
In the drinking or drug mode, I overanalyzed decisions I had made, especially regarding relationships, and overanalyzed what I should do, as if life was this gigantic, all-important chess game.
Not been feeling the need to do that as I have more confidence with things. The world is not gonna fall apart if my work day is not exactly perfect, nor is a particular relationship gonna fall apart if I don't do something perfectly.
I'm learning that doing things my way is doing things imperfectly, which is ok because that makes me me. lol
In the drinking or drug mode, I overanalyzed decisions I had made, especially regarding relationships, and overanalyzed what I should do, as if life was this gigantic, all-important chess game.
Not been feeling the need to do that as I have more confidence with things. The world is not gonna fall apart if my work day is not exactly perfect, nor is a particular relationship gonna fall apart if I don't do something perfectly.
I'm learning that doing things my way is doing things imperfectly, which is ok because that makes me me. lol
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,231
Originally Posted by talldude 
Been nearly 4 months and things are getting better.
In the drinking or drug mode, I overanalyzed decisions I had made, especially regarding relationships, and overanalyzed what I should do, as if life was this gigantic, all-important chess game.
Not been feeling the need to do that as I have more confidence with things. The world is not gonna fall apart if my work day is not exactly perfect, nor is a particular relationship gonna fall apart if I don't do something perfectly.
I'm learning that doing things my way is doing things imperfectly, which is ok because that makes me me. lol
In the drinking or drug mode, I overanalyzed decisions I had made, especially regarding relationships, and overanalyzed what I should do, as if life was this gigantic, all-important chess game.
Not been feeling the need to do that as I have more confidence with things. The world is not gonna fall apart if my work day is not exactly perfect, nor is a particular relationship gonna fall apart if I don't do something perfectly.
I'm learning that doing things my way is doing things imperfectly, which is ok because that makes me me. lol
One time early on in my marriage my wife told me Life is not some software program that i can just program and get the outcome i want. I always meticulously micromanaged it all. Instead of just allowing things to be and going with the flow and being happy with wherever that took me.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,602
I was scared of being happy for a long time cos in my head happiness was that period just before everything turned to mud again...
I was all scared cos happiness is an intense feeling and I self medicated my intense feelings for years...
I hope you'll roll with it TallDude - happiness is nothing to fear
D
I was all scared cos happiness is an intense feeling and I self medicated my intense feelings for years...
I hope you'll roll with it TallDude - happiness is nothing to fear
D
now's the time
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 2,181
Originally Posted by talldude
Been nearly 4 months and things are getting better.
In the drinking or drug mode, I overanalyzed decisions I had made, especially regarding relationships, and overanalyzed what I should do, as if life was this gigantic, all-important chess game.
Not been feeling the need to do that as I have more confidence with things. The world is not gonna fall apart if my work day is not exactly perfect, nor is a particular relationship gonna fall apart if I don't do something perfectly.
I'm learning that doing things my way is doing things imperfectly, which is ok because that makes me me. lol
In the drinking or drug mode, I overanalyzed decisions I had made, especially regarding relationships, and overanalyzed what I should do, as if life was this gigantic, all-important chess game.
Not been feeling the need to do that as I have more confidence with things. The world is not gonna fall apart if my work day is not exactly perfect, nor is a particular relationship gonna fall apart if I don't do something perfectly.
I'm learning that doing things my way is doing things imperfectly, which is ok because that makes me me. lol
So glad that you're enjoying your sobriety! Congrats on 4 months!
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