Debbie329

I don't know how AA is in your neck of the woods but around here we got a drug court judge who sends everyone to AA......most of them don't want to be there they are just being complaint.....they don't go to therapists they're not actively trying to be sober........I don't want to be around those people, that why I come here. We're here cause we wanna be and we all are working to stay sober. That's the group I want to belong to.

ScottFromWI

SR is definitely a group that i want to belong to as well. Glad you are here too Debbie. Have you ever checked to see if there are other AA meetings in your area? Around here there is definitely one that has a lot of court-ordered people that attend, but there are several others that are smaller groups and different populations.

There are also online AA meetings, a quick Google search will help you find them.

advbike

I've been to AA meetings in several states and even a few countries, and rarely experienced a bad meeting. Most people there are helpful and just like us. I'm not a big AA person but there's actually a lot of value in working the program, if you want to achieve real change and serenity. Btw, my psychologist is a big supporter, and a recovered alcoholic himself. He said I could spend a few years with him (at $150/session) or a few months to achieve the same level of recovery working the 12 steps of AA.

I mention all this because it might be worth approaching with an open mind.

Debbie329

Scott.....The AA meetings in my town are filled w drug court people.....maybe if I go to ones that are harder to get to those people won't be there. I'm thinking about that strategy........so meetings where public transportation doesn't go.

Debbie329

Adv....yeah my psychiatrist is a big supporter of AA too.........I know some people that go to meetings and they still drink and drug. It's like a social event for them. im not interested in a social event and coffee.........I want real help. I called again for a therapist this morning .......im working on that. It's a shame I'm 52 years old and I'm still broken.....that bothers me.

JeffreyAK

And your self-medication increases your anxiety and depression when you're not high. It's a vicious circle that you need to get out of.

IWLSAST

Hi Debbie329,

While living in rural PA and after many years of saying AA wasn't right for me, I finally decided to stop looking at why not - but all the reasons that I did align. That was 28 months and 500 plus mtgs ago.

Last night I sat between a man with 23 years sober and another with 31 years sober...both came to the program via court order. In both their shares last night they stated that AA was the most important aspect of their life. Without a structured recovery plan, they would have nothing else of worth.

I've found that AA is like anything else in life...you will get out of it what you put into it. Meetings are but one part...in fact, it never says in the Big Book that meeting makers make it. For me, AA offers a program of recovery. Since I have embraced what it suggests in How It Works, I have found peace and serenity. In fact, most days I am joyous, happy and best of all FREE from the bondage of self contentedness and desire to drink.

Never in my stints of 11.5 years, 16 and 13 months not drinking in the past did I find the tools that AA offers.

I think I read that you said you were ready to give up. So was I just 28 months ago...but AA not only saved my life, but offered a path worth living...last point, I do not have a religious bone in my body. For me, AA has nothing to do with religion. My HP has been evolving...at first it was the AA fellowship...today it is The Universe.

I am not in any way an AA thumper. Lots of programs work. I can only offer what has worked for me. I hope you find one as I have that helpds you not only survive this DUI - but thrive in life!

My Best,

Carlos

ScottFromWI

That is the case in my area. There is one big AA club with a permanent building near the downtown area, most of the court ordered people go there. There are literally dozens of others though at churches, schools, hospitals and other locations in the suburbs and other outlying areas. The demographic is much different at those.

Do keep in mind though that it's still possible to attend the meeting and get benefit out of it even if not everyone is committed.

Pondlady

I was about your age when I quit drinking and was on meds for anxiety and depression. The meds are much more effective without the alcohol. I'm glad you weren't hurt seriously.

Debbie329

I picked up my rental car today. I'm also going to an AA meeting today.....it's out in the country and its a alcoholic rehab facility. I spoke to my friend he said he will direct me to meetings where people are sincere about their recovery......he also echoed my thoughts and said there are meetings that are hard to get to and those are better meetings. I've been wanting to go to this meeting for a while. I also made an appt w a therapist for Monday......the lawyers at 3. Thanks everyone for your input. This is why I like soberrecovery so much.

Debbie329

Jeffrey k .......it is a vicious cycle that I need to get out of......which is why I have a psychiatrist......I've been seeing him for a year.......and I am doing better......a whole lot better........I've been more sober this year than any year that I can remember. Unfortunately it's not good enough.

Debbie329

I finished w the lawyer.......he said I'll get into a program where there is no record......and I'll lose my license for a month. He also said he does a lot of workers comp cases and that he can send a lot of business my way. And he has an office in his building that's for rent. So that's all good news. I'll report back about my AA meeting experience.

Tooshabby

Great, Debbie!!

Ken33xx

Certainly hope it works out. You want to drink wine, get high and take a valium that's your business. However, when you get behind a wheel of a car that changes everything.

You were lucky but the next time another driver or pedestrian might not be.

MIRecovery

The big question is do you want to quit drinking?

Debbie329

Ken 33.......I didn't take just 1 Valium I took 3......I was well on my way to bad choices. I don't normally drink and drive......usually I call for a cab. On Saturday night I asked someone to pick me up......they couldn't so I must have been impatient and decided to drive myself.......very bad idea. I know I'm lucky it wasn't worse. I will never ever do that again.

Debbie329

Mi recovery.......yes I would like to stop abusing myself. I would also like to be anxiety and depression free. I've been working on all those things at one time diligently for the past year. I wasn't born this way, I am a product of a very dysfunctional pair of parents and a nasty grandmother........I know I can't fix the past but it haunts me and I always feel unsafe.......and then the dance begins. I won't be drinking smoking or popping valiums anytime soon. And I can do that for months at a time.......but then bam!

MIRecovery

Alcohol abuse causes depression and anxiety so stopping drinking permanently is a great place to start. Not for months, not for anytime soon, but forever.

Getting sober takes this kind of commitment

KAD

Hi Debbie. First of all, glad you didn't get hurt and no one else did either. You are quite fortunate in that regard, and in what your attorney anticipates will be the outcome of your case. I just went to court in August for my first DWI, which also included totalling my car, and I lost my license for a year. I hear that's pretty standard here in NC.

In AA, I've often heard the phrase "contempt prior to investigation." That was definitely my attitude toward AA for 28 years of drinking. One humbling experience after another led me to the point where I was willing to at least give it a try, and willingness is a necessary component to whatever you choose to do to deal with addiction. I'm learning, little by little, how to change from the inside out. I just celebrated 6 months sober. Now, its not the first time I've been there, but it is the first time my sobriety has been about more than just not drinking.

Best wishes to you. Count your blessings, and never give up!

Debbie329

Well I went to my first AA meeting and it was not open to the public it was for rehab patients only. The next one is tomorrow night is at a hospital outside my town. The guy I went w has been in AA for 19 years........and he still can't stop from abusing himself w Xanax, Valium , cocaine and heroin. I said what has AA done for you over those 19 years.......he said I had 31/2 years of sobriety once and a year here and there. I know alcohol causes anxiety and depression but I'm already that way naturally. I have to find a way to stop abusing myself that's my real goal. Some people cut themselves, some people overeat, some gamble....some go on spending sprees.