what's the deal...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: florida
Posts: 207
what's the deal...
Hello.. I am going on almost 14 months, still unemployed, but looking, got a new sponsor and started going over step 5 today, It went well. but, honestly, I have been pretty much a psychological wreck since getting (discharged) fired from my job. I was getting paid well and the person that let me go was axed a week later. anyway - still lonely and alone as hell.. I think I am severely flawed or something. Granted, the meetings do help with fellowshipping and all. I don't understand, I have my own place, some money, sobriety, a car, look pretty good, work out. I feel like i don't even exist to some women. Maybe I'm too old and should not even bother. It seems my epitaph with be "a dollar short and a day late" I know this is a luxury problem, but damn.. I have been on the straight and narrow for a awhile here. it seems like everyone just has someone for themselves, but me.. it looks like there is something seriously wrong with me.. sorry if I am whining, but are there any others that have over a year and feel like this, like they cannot connect or no one is there romantically? yeah, i know this probably sounds pathetic... whatever...
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: rapid city south dakota
Posts: 174
Ya I have over a year by about 19 or so unfortunately we are living with the first generations of fully liberated women and that means most women are going live their lives reliving that first moment of freedom they had which was probably when they were hanging out with their best friend from 7th grade having sex with all the boys because its just human nature im a alcoholic primarily for the same reason my first taste of freedom came on the first day I ever skipped school, me and a couple of friends went to one of their houses and snagged a few beers from the fridge now every time I taste beer I think of that day sometimes consciously sometimes subconsciously then I spend days bingeing trying to keep that feeling going now ive wrecked my life all the way around because im chasing my youth but women have wrecked society doing the same because they are not supposed to spend years of their adult lives chasing boys they are supposed to contribute so society by being mothers and faithful wives raising their family with moral structure , when you here a older person say "the problem with todays society is theres no family values being practiced" they are absolutely right so you see theres nothing wrong with you its society thats screwed up personally I think womens liberation and meth are both concerted efforts by satan to bring about chaos and consequently the end of times,they both showed up at the same time and there both accomplishing the same thing homicides, suicides, and paranoid schizophrenia are at a all time high along with infidelity, divorce, and domestic violence I personally know 5 guys in prison for life because of females and 4 guys dead for the same reason, so ive realized tnat im never going to find what I want because she doesn't exist anymore , but good luck to you man and God Bless
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: rapid city south dakota
Posts: 174
And sorry I dont mean to come down on women so hard after all they are my favorite kind of people im just saying its not their fault society is letting them run wild all their lives they are just taking advantage of the situation lots of people would do the same the only thing with them is theres millions and millions of them all doing this at the same time thats why society has collapsed ya see thats how it works in ANY societys destruction first you have moral collapse (thats where women and meth come in) then you have economic collapse which is what we are seing now. May God save us all
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
I a few years over a year. never been married and not in a relationship at this time. yup, I can get lonely. but I love myself today.
IF I wanted to go on a date or meet women, it would be up to me to reach out.
are you reaching out ? striking up conversation?
but since yer a psychological wreck, wouldn't it be better to work on you? get comfortable being by yourself?
IF I wanted to go on a date or meet women, it would be up to me to reach out.
are you reaching out ? striking up conversation?
but since yer a psychological wreck, wouldn't it be better to work on you? get comfortable being by yourself?
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
Pete, I think it's so important to fully accept and love yourself first. Feel comfortable in your own skin and in your own life. Get involved in activities that you enjoy. The right woman will come along.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
pete1975,
i don't appreciate rants that blame women for moral collapse and men's downfall.
if you had lumped together any other group, if you had said "first you have moral collapse (thats where jews and hispanics come in)" it would be really clear that your point is out of line and bigoted.
i don't appreciate rants that blame women for moral collapse and men's downfall.
if you had lumped together any other group, if you had said "first you have moral collapse (thats where jews and hispanics come in)" it would be really clear that your point is out of line and bigoted.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Oh, Pete!
My goodness, that is a cynical and sad state of mind.
I am a woman and I came of age in the 70s. In my experience, men didn't want to settle down. They wanted to have sex with no commitment. Women have done that too - and not just in the last generation. People have been cheating and drinking and acting out violently since man first walked upright.
We also have set a generally higher standard for relationships since women have become able to work and make some requirements, like fidelity and sobriety and no violence in the home. Sure I could have stayed married - to an alcoholic drug user who had checked out. Or maybe I should have stayed with the first one - he was an alcoholic, a philanderer and a violent man who beat me. Luckily I didn't marry that one, I just left in the middle of the day when he was gone. That seemed like a way to have a miserable life.
Women are now requiring the same treatment men have always enjoyed, because we can leave and still survive with our children. If I were a man with a cheating drunk abusive mate, I would leave her, too.
Sorry you don't believe we deserve better.
I respectfully disagree.
My goodness, that is a cynical and sad state of mind.
I am a woman and I came of age in the 70s. In my experience, men didn't want to settle down. They wanted to have sex with no commitment. Women have done that too - and not just in the last generation. People have been cheating and drinking and acting out violently since man first walked upright.
We also have set a generally higher standard for relationships since women have become able to work and make some requirements, like fidelity and sobriety and no violence in the home. Sure I could have stayed married - to an alcoholic drug user who had checked out. Or maybe I should have stayed with the first one - he was an alcoholic, a philanderer and a violent man who beat me. Luckily I didn't marry that one, I just left in the middle of the day when he was gone. That seemed like a way to have a miserable life.
Women are now requiring the same treatment men have always enjoyed, because we can leave and still survive with our children. If I were a man with a cheating drunk abusive mate, I would leave her, too.
Sorry you don't believe we deserve better.
I respectfully disagree.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
yeah, that was pretty sick to talk about women that way.
I think if I had that attitude I wouldn't ever have a respectable, honest,caring, loving woman in my life.
but I think I would be taking a hostage.
I think if I had that attitude I wouldn't ever have a respectable, honest,caring, loving woman in my life.
but I think I would be taking a hostage.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: florida
Posts: 207
Fini....sorry.. but just to make it clear.. I am not "pete1975", i am petewill.. the person who started this post and i am in no way blaming women for the state of relationships today, I am/was just trying to figure what my issue was.. I am always in support of women.. in general.. just to clairify..thanks
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Petewill, sorry - I didn't realize you had the name "Pete" - my post was directed at pete1975, as well.
Sorry to highjack your thread.
We are really not in control of when the right person comes along, or if they ever do, at all. I know it's important to get out there, be honest, and be patient. Living life and enjoying activities usually leads to meeting interesting people.
Sorry to highjack your thread.
We are really not in control of when the right person comes along, or if they ever do, at all. I know it's important to get out there, be honest, and be patient. Living life and enjoying activities usually leads to meeting interesting people.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
Fini....sorry.. but just to make it clear.. I am not "pete1975",
yes, i know you're not pete1975, which is why i made sure to address my post to pete 1975 so you wouldn't think i was responding to you .
looks like that didn't work as planned
yes, i have trouble connecting also. as in i'm self-conscious, awkward. and i've been "alone" a long time, but am not lonely.
if you're feeling lonely, no, i don't see that as what you called a luxury problem. that's a painful place to be.
something that jumped out at me from your post is this: I have my own place, some money, sobriety, a car, look pretty good, work out....I have been on the straight and narrow for a awhile here.
you have a lot going for you, Pete, a lot of good stuff that's good in and of itself, and doesn't need or equate to now getting some kind of "reward" for having been so good on the straight and narrow....maybe i misunderstood; just sounded that way when i was reading.
sometimes it helps me to consciously change my perspective to appreciate all the good stuff that is in my life instead of focusing on what seems "missing".
and if you're serious about thinking you're a psychological wreck and something seriously wrong with you, then a visit to a healthcare person might be a good place to start exploring that.
easy to say, i know.
yes, i know you're not pete1975, which is why i made sure to address my post to pete 1975 so you wouldn't think i was responding to you .
looks like that didn't work as planned
yes, i have trouble connecting also. as in i'm self-conscious, awkward. and i've been "alone" a long time, but am not lonely.
if you're feeling lonely, no, i don't see that as what you called a luxury problem. that's a painful place to be.
something that jumped out at me from your post is this: I have my own place, some money, sobriety, a car, look pretty good, work out....I have been on the straight and narrow for a awhile here.
you have a lot going for you, Pete, a lot of good stuff that's good in and of itself, and doesn't need or equate to now getting some kind of "reward" for having been so good on the straight and narrow....maybe i misunderstood; just sounded that way when i was reading.
sometimes it helps me to consciously change my perspective to appreciate all the good stuff that is in my life instead of focusing on what seems "missing".
and if you're serious about thinking you're a psychological wreck and something seriously wrong with you, then a visit to a healthcare person might be a good place to start exploring that.
easy to say, i know.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: rapid city south dakota
Posts: 174
And dont try to make me look like im saying different cultures ruin society people do thats what I was saying its strange how people think the world has always been like this because it hasn't this is a new development if it was always likes this how come society didnt collapse decades ago? Answer me that
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: rapid city south dakota
Posts: 174
And bimini if you grew up in the 70's I wasnt talking about you I was talking about these supposed women that were born liberated im 39 yrs old and 90% of the supposed women that I went to school with are consciously staying single so they can live the exact way they did when they were 13 yrs old ill pray for all of you
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Florida
Posts: 554
Dear Pete, my story of dating/relationships in a nutshell. In my 20's I was desperate to meet the man I'd someday marry. Its all I thought about, rather than enjoying more of those years. One day I was thinking, hey, I'm 27--I always wanted to live in NYC. SO I transferred there with my company, said I'd live there one year. THEN I'd go back to college for a new degree (my job enabled P/T work) and forget men, and just enjoy myself. Sure enough, IN NYC Oct 3, 1993. (1st day of work, arrived 2 weeks earlier to settle in). Oct 4, met the man I'd marry and have children with. I realize its like a bad romance novel...but I think it was my attitude..I no longer cared about it. I was going to be the best me I could..and I truly tried and did a great job of it. (until 16 years later my drinking escalated). But I'm slowly going back to the much younger womans ideals of enjoying what you are able to. Also, know yourself. When I accepted, hey, I'm not the social butterfly, but I can be a good friend..I'm kind, loving, a good daughter, etc. No, I wont win dance contests or sing at kareoke...I sweat when having to speak in public. But now I can joke of these thing and self deprecate a bit about it.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
