zjw

smash in some bananas! the carbs and nutrients will solve both problems

Woozy

Stop trying to figure out your alcoholism yourself and read what people have been posting to you for MONTHS AND MONTHS NOW! YOU ARE NOT LISTENING.

Lenina

If you have not drank daily, or excessively, wouldn't you have done that before now?

love from Lenina

sunrise1

Try not drinking. For realz.

How many laps do you want to take on the crazy train? It always leads back to the same place.

waynetheking

Karate, just my opinion here, but you have to hit bottom before you get serious about quitting for good. You will wake up one morning and realize that taking one more sip will kill you. I've read your other post. Im sure you understand that alcoholism kills you. I hate to be so blunt. Just trying to help.

Dee74

Hi Karate
^ Unless you were parrotting and giving us what we want to hear back last year, clearly you know the answer.

I did too.
But I couldn't accept it.
Me, beaten by a liquid?

It took me 20 years of steadily worsening losses to my health, my job and my family until I admitted I could not drink and be the man I wanted to be.

One, or the other - but not both.

There's no shame in realising you're in a fight you can't win - I was fighting myself. Stalemate.

Best thing I ever did was hang up the gloves on this one.
D

PhaseTwo

There are many more posts just like the one Dee just highlighted in which you've came to the conclusion moderation won't work for you. Be honest with yourself anytime you feel you can drink again.

karate

I don't know if im crazy or a drunk or both .

But with a lot of effort ,I have come to a point of acceptance with my life ,whatever or however it is .

Im actually pretty happy .

jdooner

If you are happy, go with that. This is the point of life, to live a fulfilled life, your own life.

If this changes and you find you need or want some support to adjust things in your life like drinking, we will be here for you Karate. Enjoy the Dirt Bike!

karate

Well ,thanks .

I still intend to hang around here and read ,and post some .

Im doing my own form of a program , have read quite a few books on depression ,and the Big book a dozen times .

My life is not without problems , the largest problem I have and cant seem to overcome is some days I feel like total CRAP , its not attitude related ,psysical lack of energy .

Other days I feel really good ,with no different change in how I go about life .

I know and have posted that not all days we will feel good , but the difference in how I feel some days is dramatic .

ScottFromWI

What exactly is the end goal of your program if you don't mind my asking?

karate

To be happy ,and have a good day every day .

I think a good day "every " day might be a fantasy , but I sure have lots more good days than bad .

I would put the good day ratio at about 90% overall .


The days I work hard and get a lot done are the best days I have .

There are days I feel like crap ,then push through and work hard -then feel better .

RobbyRobot

For me it appears you have come to a settlement for the apathetic worth of your moderated life. This is not happiness. This is despair and misery. This is eventual ruination. Apathy is often subtle in its creeping process into the undefended lives of those who refuse to accept the obvious consequences of their actions.

I don't for a second believe your pretty happy, Karate.

karate

You don't ?

Drinking is not the cornerstone of my life , weather im drinking or not at the time
Im not drinking at this time .

I seriously need to learn to have fun again , the rat race ...... Well has turned me into a fellow without any enjoyment -or fun in life .

I have a good attitude despite working so much .

You can really work all the time and still have a good attitude and be happy .

WritingFromLife

Hi Karate--maybe what you are experiencing is complacency when you could be experiencing contentment?

Alcohol in any amount keeps me complacent--It dulls the lines of the real moments in life.

There's a difference between joy and happiness, I believe. Happy is a mood. Joy is a being. Hugs, friend.

Stoogy

There's your motivation right there, you can do it.

RobbyRobot

I agree on the all work no play isn't enjoyable whatsoever. The idea though that drinking only effects you while your actually drinking is just wishful thinking. You don't have to be all alcoholic to have drinking take the best of you and leave you trashed in the process. Its accumulative. It builds issues and can easily undo the strongest of us. A life of bingeing can be just as destructive as every day drinking results in. Don't be fooled by frequency.

You do have a good attitude, Karate. Tis true. The thing is, your problems are not about attitude, are they now?

Food for thought, Karate.

bigsombrero

Hope you get back on track. I think the majority of folks here think it's best to work on a plan that doesn't involve any alcohol, ever. Those choices in the end are yours to make though, nobody will argue that. Good luck!

karate

All valid points ,But being angry and having a bad attitude sure made me want to drink .

It seems to be the cornerstone of any program ,AA is built on the idea if you solve the issues you wont want to drink .

I have noticed that point to be valid ,in my experience .

ScottFromWI

So you don't view your drinking as a problem or as even somehow connected to your ability to be happy or have a good day?

Do you not remember your "experiment" of last week where even a small amount of alcohol caused you to fail a test and how it screwed up your daily life?