DG0409

So, it starts pouring rain. The weather man gets on the news and tells every one there is a flash flood warning and to evacuate. One lady stays in her house. Her neighbors come over to make sure she heard the news and ask if she needs any help leaving. "No," she replies, "God will save me."

It keeps raining and pretty soon the streets are flooded. The lady has to climb up to the second story of her house as the first floor is flooded. While she's watching out the window a man comes by in a boat. He offers to take her with him. "No," she replies, "God will save me."

It keeps raining and pretty soon, the lady is on her roof. The rescue helicopter comes and tries to rescue her. The lady won't get on the helicopter, though, saying, "God will save me."

The lady drowns in the flood and goes to heaven where she asks God, "God, why didn't you save me?!?"

God replies, "Well, I tried 3 times!"

2granddaughters

God works through people. "Where 2 or more are gathered together in My name"

I began to listen to those boring, crusty oldtimers (saying the same things over & over)... and recovery began to happen.

All the best.

Bob R

Boleo

Outside circumstances are not always what gets better when we get sober.
Rather it is how we perceive those circumstances that gets better. As long as I saw myself as a victim of circumstances - I felt like a victim. We manufacture our own misery by approaching the situation with unrealistic expectations.

"In this life - pain is inevitable - suffering is optional"
(ancient Chinese saying. Author unknown)

"All expectations are seeds for resentment"
(Chuang Tzu)

GracieLou

Yes, that is what we do. We seek support and advice.



IMO life and sobriety are two separate things.

First we get sober. Getting sober means working on ourselves, changing our attitudes, being humble and grateful. All this is done while not drinking.

Then we live life and being sober in that life is sobriety.


That is life you are speaking of, not sobriety. Life is harsh and it is not all fun and rainbows. Learning to handle all that crap that is thrown at us and dealing with it without hiding in the bottle, that is sobriety.

Welcome to the club. This has all happened to us in one degree or another. I drank for 26 years. Do you think I have not lost out on a thing or two?

For me, the process is to learn what I can do to remain sober. Learn what it takes to face the challenges that life deals out sober. Then take all the advice, tricks, tools, prayers, people, meetings, books, websites, message boards and anything else I can get my hand on and live life without the alcohol. For me, that is sobriety.

EndGameNYC

Drinking again or drinking more will neither bring back the time we've lost nor improve our lives. You need to ask yourself what it is you want out of life and what you're willing to do to achieve it.

LosingmyMisery

I'm actually looking for help. My sobriety periods have not been filled with rainbows and unicorns. My mental health issues continue in sobriety. My legal problems continue in sobriety. Painting a picture to the newcomer that everything is wonderful in sobriety is very dangerous.

Honestly, rainbows and unicorns? I've seen a few rainbows in my life, but that had nothing to do with my sobriety and everything to do with the weather. If I ran across a unicorn, I would think I would need to put the plug in the jug and try harder on straightening myself out.

Sobriety isn't mythical. It is painfully filled with the truth, raw truth. Mental health issues don't disappear from sobriety. Many of us drink to mask our mental health problems. It has to be dealt with in the proper way and being sober helps us to think the solutions out clearly. I had to clear up my problems one problem at a time. First I got sober, I got a job, I dealt with my depression, I cleaned up my financial mess. Through all of this, I've grown. I've learned And again, it takes time. Patience is a virtue. It isn't easy, but if you want results, we all have to learn it.

Often times I think you miss the entire point. Getting sober doesn't make life easier, immediately. Money problems take time to develop and takes time to resolve. We've already had this discussion, remember? Digging yourself out of the hole doesn't happen just because you quit drinking. You have to make things happen. You have to clean up the mess, not by thinking about it, but by making it happen, doing it. Are you making the efforts to do that? Yes, you are working, that is great. However, gambling the money away, not so great. That is exchanging one addiction for another.

I don't think anyone is endangering a newcomer by implying that becoming sober you will wake up and life will be fabulous. Getting sober means you will wake up sober and can make better choices in life. With those choices, your life can improve, financially, physically, mentally and spiritually. Nothing dangerous in that.

Now...let's move forward. How about it? When you get some good sober time under your belt and start to see results, perhaps you will be able to relate better. I have absolutely no purpose indicating my life is better now that I'm sober, if it really wasn't. I'd be moaning and complaining and asking the same question you are, but I'm not. Why do you suppose that is? Hmmmmm...think about that for awhile. Just trying to help.

No, sobriety is not overrated. I'm saddened to think I wasted many years drunk and in a stupor. I'm ashamed I hurt my loved ones by my selfish actions in drinking. I would rather die than to have to suffer through the hellish life of a drinking drunk. I sincerely mean that. I love being sober and I'm so very grateful that I was given the solution to live a better way of life.

Soberpotamus

Brilliant, I agree.

Soberpotamus

Seriously? I just don't get it.

EndGameNYC

"No, sobriety is not overrated. I'm saddened to think I wasted many years drunk and in a stupor. I'm ashamed I hurt my loved ones by my selfish actions in drinking. I would rather die than to have to suffer through the hellish life of a drinking drunk. I sincerely mean that. I love being sober and I'm so very grateful that I was given the solution to live a better way of life."

Great post.

When we're desperate but still not ready to stop, we look for reasons, no matter how tattered, to continue drinking. Framing the emotional stability that often comes with the hard work we do to stay sober -- and that we see and hear about from people in recovery -- as counterfeit, is one way of rationalizing our continued drinking.

EndGameNYC

Originally Posted by WritingFromLife
"In a warped sort of way, I miss having to report to a probation officer every few months."

Active and untreated alcoholism doesn't exactly leave us with a full life.