soberlicious

People can be idiots, especially drunk people. I laugh along too, at the fact that they are so incredibly stooopid.

Happier

I can relate. I have been on the receiving end of the "your no fun anymore" comment and I frankly did not like it.
I think if it happens again I will look them in the eye, and sincerely and nicely as possible, smile and say "I am happy with my life". i will mean it.
Back when i was drinking, I would have liked to have known that being happily sober was an option.

fini

a Mona Lisa inscrutable smile, with a little touch of smirkiness added, then a "CIAO, catch you later", and out you waltz.
and don't take it home with you.

you can practice this in fron of a mirror and have some fun.

Like2Hike

Sometimes it's easier to laugh than cry about the past. At a recent Holiday party I declined a drink from a lifelong friend with the response, "I've retired from the drinking game". His reply, "Good cause you had a Hall of Fame career!". We both laughed hard while he congratulated me on making the change.

lillyknitting

Don't take any notice, they're all jelous because you can han have a lovely time without getting out of your head, looking dreadful, feeling utterly terrible the next day. You just carry on serenely doing what you are doing in the end you will have the upper hand by looking and feeling fantastic, and anyway, now you have choices, you don't have to go to those places and listen to their crap, but it's somewhat comforting to see that you don't have to look and behave like them either. Well done.

MythOfSisyphus

Just tell people, "I used to drink to make people like you interesting. It didn't help."

Zube

Hmmm. Lemme see...

Spit in his beer when he gets up to use the restroom.
Get other people to spit in his beer when he gets up to use the restroom.
Move his chair to another table every time he gets up to use the restroom.
Offer to pick up his tab, then duck out the back door leaving only enough for your soda.
Tell the bouncer that he is harassing you, and threatened to kill you.
Call the police to report a drunk driver every time he leaves the pub.
Slip a roofie in his beer.
When he says that you are being no fun tell him that is because your dog just died.
Tell him that you would drink but it could violate your parole.
Let him know that alcohol is for losers then get him hooked on heroin so he stays home.

Obviously these are jokes. I agree with the other posts. Don't sweat it. Usually losers like that get bored and find somebody else to bother.

Zube

MissLucyG

Love all your answers guys! This has been so helpful, thanks xxx

hypochondriac

When people called me boring I asked them 'how?'. As far as I could tell I was no different socially when I was drinking to when I was sober. No one ever answered that question.

This was a major problem for me too Lucy, but believe me when I say it gets easier with time. It's hard to say but I think I still get plenty of people asking about why I'm not drinking and calling me boring but now it's like water off a ducks back whereas 6 months ago or so it would have really threw me. Comments like that always made me feel like I should be drinking. Limiting your contact is good if you can. I worried about slipping away early from things but really the only reason to stay late at parties/events whatever is to drink. And at that stage no one would be able to recall if I was there or not.

Another possibility is that as time has passed other people have accepted I don't drink, I think it takes friends time to adapt to our sobriety as well.

One thing that spurred me on to quit was a colleague of mine who's tolerance to alcohol went down rapidly and she'd start singing after 3 pints. Mine wasn't but that's something I have said too, that I can't drink like I used to so I'd rather not do it at all, I don't want to be seen as a lightweight. It's not strictly true but I certainly was getting far too many negative consequences to drinking.

I think overall you will find that people will respect you for not drinking. There is a quiet dignity that comes with being sober and happy about it that other people can't mess with. Once they see that they'll stop bothering you

Jen31

I've found that now, I can't stand the people I would hang around when I drank. One person in particular, I was friends with for 15 years (from the age of 16). Now I can't stand to look at her. I realize, looking back, how mean she was to me; but, at that time i didn't care. I needed a drinking buddy.
New friends means a new attitude and a whole new perspective on life. Don't waste your time with people who are going to bring you down.

jazzfish

I had another recent post where I tried to get at this very aspect. I think I will acquire this over time by treating my own sobriety with dignity.

I've dealt with the boring thing before, but then I realized that sitting at a bar downing beer after beer, day after day, really wasn't all that exciting. I had many exciting times while drinking (or what I considered exciting at the time). However, I cannot even comprehend sitting at a bar for 6-8 hours ever day now.

I have to remember in those situations that I am dealing with drunks and logic will no longer work. They may even be saying things they will regret later. The best way to shut up a drunk is hit them right where it hurts, their self confidence. However, I am finding it much more valuable to remind myself that by walking away I am doing what is right for me. And what could be better than that after a lifetime of ignoring what is best for me?

Twinco

I am not an alcoholic, but my wife is a recovering alcoholic. I have never been a heavy drinker, and often times I would go out with drinking friends and just not feel like having an alcoholic drink. I too would receive the same comments about being boring, need to have more fun, etc. I would either ignore the comments or simply state that I did not want to drink, and then go on to have just as much fun or even more fun than my drunk friends. Life can be very enjoyable and satisfying while drinking a club soda. Alcohol does not make it fun, more often than not it causes problems and creates situations that the drinker ultimately regrets. Aslo most people who are drinking will do anything they can to get those around them to drink. I don't know why, but drinkers seem to resent the presense of a nondrinker around them.

abc

I tell them I will drink when they catch up. They are so far behind in the race! I tell them to go off and drink as much as I have already drank in life, and then come back and let's compare notes.

hiho

I confess that I was one of those drinkers who called non drinkers boring at parties and nightclubs, and it wasn't about them. It was about my envy of them, their inner confidence and happiness. I was jealous of the way they didn't need alcohol to feel better. I would guess that these people are feeling jealous, don't let what they are saying get to you - you are doing the right thing for your health and sanity.

Some comebacks, maybe:

Enjoy your interesting night!
Stay interesting!
I don't want to have an interesting hangover tomorrow, bye!

Sarcasm is usually lost on people who are drunk though so this sort of thing might not work. Maybe just agree with whatever they are saying with a laugh 'yeah, I am no fun' etc and work hard on seeing the big picture.

bumble

They're trying to rankle you. Hiho's suggestion to agree with them is perfect, since they can't continue the argument they're trying to start.

If you don't show that it bothers you, it won't be any fun for them and they'll stop.