So here I go... Confession time... :(
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Hi Vegi! It's great to see you again! I'm glad you came back for help and support. Trying to do it alone is awful. You know we understand how you're feeling right now.
I had 3 yrs. once and decided to have 'a couple'. I was off and running for 7 yrs. of hell. That's when I found SR. I have almost 5 yrs. again. You will do this!! Congratulations on having a great man in your life, and for wanting to get back on track so you can lead the life you deserve.
I had 3 yrs. once and decided to have 'a couple'. I was off and running for 7 yrs. of hell. That's when I found SR. I have almost 5 yrs. again. You will do this!! Congratulations on having a great man in your life, and for wanting to get back on track so you can lead the life you deserve.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
thanks for your story it makes me realize just how easy it is to slip. and ot be on my gaurd a slip up like yours sounds like how it might go down for me. I'd probably make excuses for myself etc.. too. I probably shouldnt even smell the stuff. Although my wife coooked with wine once since i quit and yeah i know you cook with it the alcohol cooks off. But i could taste the wine and i about yaked and refused to eat dinner. It just flooded my mind with too many bad memories. I'm happy for that! i'd rather eat a sandwich or something.
Tho i made coconut milk and got to thinking ti would go great in a strawberry smoothy then the devil on the one side was like hell yeah with a 151 floater on top. I was like UGG god no it'd be tasty just with the strawberries GO AWAY BAD VOICE!!.
Tho i made coconut milk and got to thinking ti would go great in a strawberry smoothy then the devil on the one side was like hell yeah with a 151 floater on top. I was like UGG god no it'd be tasty just with the strawberries GO AWAY BAD VOICE!!.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: SE and then South some more
Posts: 2,648
Originally Posted by Dee74 
show up?
sometimes I think I never leave VB
D
sometimes I think I never leave VB
D
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: SE and then South some more
Posts: 2,648
Originally Posted by Hevyn
Hi Vegi! It's great to see you again! I'm glad you came back for help and support. Trying to do it alone is awful. You know we understand how you're feeling right now.
I had 3 yrs. once and decided to have 'a couple'. I was off and running for 7 yrs. of hell. That's when I found SR. I have almost 5 yrs. again. You will do this!! Congratulations on having a great man in your life, and for wanting to get back on track so you can lead the life you deserve.
I had 3 yrs. once and decided to have 'a couple'. I was off and running for 7 yrs. of hell. That's when I found SR. I have almost 5 yrs. again. You will do this!! Congratulations on having a great man in your life, and for wanting to get back on track so you can lead the life you deserve.
I know I'm not the only one, but when you do relapse, you're living a lie, your know what you're doing is wrong, and wonder, "how long can I keep this going before it goes to h*ll?" For a year this has been going on... I've had enough.
Love this site. xo
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: SE and then South some more
Posts: 2,648
Originally Posted by zjw
thanks for your story it makes me realize just how easy it is to slip. and ot be on my gaurd a slip up like yours sounds like how it might go down for me. I'd probably make excuses for myself etc.. too. I probably shouldnt even smell the stuff. Although my wife coooked with wine once since i quit and yeah i know you cook with it the alcohol cooks off. But i could taste the wine and i about yaked and refused to eat dinner. It just flooded my mind with too many bad memories. I'm happy for that! i'd rather eat a sandwich or something.
Tho i made coconut milk and got to thinking ti would go great in a strawberry smoothy then the devil on the one side was like hell yeah with a 151 floater on top. I was like UGG god no it'd be tasty just with the strawberries GO AWAY BAD VOICE!!.
Tho i made coconut milk and got to thinking ti would go great in a strawberry smoothy then the devil on the one side was like hell yeah with a 151 floater on top. I was like UGG god no it'd be tasty just with the strawberries GO AWAY BAD VOICE!!.
YEP!!!! I was doing that before I got sober the first time, I'd make a healthy smoothie and add vodka, because well, that's still good, right??? Oh the lies we will tell ourselves.
Thanks ZJW
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: SE and then South some more
Posts: 2,648
Originally Posted by Lenina
VeggieBean! I have thought of you often! glad you're back among us!
Love from your friend Lenina
Love from your friend Lenina
Tired of being sick and tired, ya know??
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Around and About
Posts: 1,254
I relapsed after 13 years and have been fighting it ever since. Every relapse makes it harder, I think, but I keep fighting and trying to stick close to AA, and change my life so it is focused on good things.
BTW, I had 6 years, then 8 years...it doesn't get easier. Double up on the good stuff that helped.
BTW, I had 6 years, then 8 years...it doesn't get easier. Double up on the good stuff that helped.
Keeping it simple!
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Surrey, BC
Posts: 3,282
4 years is really good and no one can take that away from you.
I don't kid myself. It is possible for anyone to relapse. I pray I never do, but there is always that chance. I just try to get thru each day and try to keep working on myself.
I don't kid myself. It is possible for anyone to relapse. I pray I never do, but there is always that chance. I just try to get thru each day and try to keep working on myself.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 1,126
So glad you made it, VB. And thanks for sharing. I've been to meetings where folks have talked of relapsing after 15, even 35 years. I learn from them every time.
I only have two years sober but I know that first drink is only a moment's bad thought away.
Thank God I had a bottom that is awfully scary. I think when I am not working my program that it is fear that keeps me sober, and I will take whatever I can to keep it that way.
I only have two years sober but I know that first drink is only a moment's bad thought away.
Thank God I had a bottom that is awfully scary. I think when I am not working my program that it is fear that keeps me sober, and I will take whatever I can to keep it that way.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,782
Welcome back!! :ghug3 I remember you well. You were a great source of help and support to me in my early days. Sorry to hear of what brought you back, but glad you're back giving it another go.
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: SE and then South some more
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Originally Posted by least
Welcome back!! :ghug3 I remember you well. You were a great source of help and support to me in my early days. Sorry to hear of what brought you back, but glad you're back giving it another go.
Either way, I'm glad to be back. Making steps, looking for some 1 on 1 sessions because I need to do some dumping (things I never did well in meetings anyway, too personal for me), and keep coming here.
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