Sudz No More

Glad you are having second thoughts about giving up JF1. I can tell you know that drinking is only a temporary patch and all the problems you face will still be there afterwards.

Justfor1

While I know that drinking won't make things better it will give me some temporary relief. Consequences never really stopped me from picking up a drink. There is no logic in alcoholism.

nobshere

Ya'know Justfor1 everybody can find a "reason" to drink, looks like to me you want to drink more than you want to be sober. You are on anxiety meds and anti depressants do you really think adding alcohol to that mix will give you "temporary" relief? Looks like to me you are playing with fire. I sincerely hope you can find the fortitude to over come this line of thinking.

neferkamichael

JustFor1, life is hard. I suppose that at 2 years 3 months sober, 1 year no crack, 3 months no cigarettes, I was expecting more. I'm probably more mentally screwed up. Gotta nice high paying job, about to get my DL back after 9 years without one and I don't feel particularly good most of the time. However what I do know is that if I go back to using it will get worse very quickly. For 42 years, I blanked life out with chemical substances, and now i don't know how to appreciate what I have. Younger brother died 1 year ago today of lung cancer, heavy cigarette smoker, oldest brother survived prostate cancer for 5 years now, but just had a heart attack last week. Right now I'm asking myself what difference does it make, but I'm not gonna do it, and I hope you don't either.

ricmcc

While I could have greatly shortened this post by saying "see above posts; they are all very good, well written and offer sound advise". But then I would not be able to relate the following short antedote, so please forgive me.
Yesterday i finally got 'round to assembling a new telescope i had ordered, a task I was dreading as my mechanical skills might best be described as being appropriate to a hampster, perhaps, but not a human. Making matters worse, the manufacturer supplied an instruction book written in English, worse yet, one that I could follow. Compounding these sins, he had the nerve to supply the correct number of parts, none left over, no parts of the 'scope left wanting parts. As a final insult, the damn thing actually works. These dire events may well be related to the fact that this was my first DIY (as opposed to DUI) task done while sober. What I mean to say is that the people who responded to your post are quite correct in saying that alcohol does not solve problems, it just masks them while they get worse (this is called entropy). People do get mad at broken cars, broken computers, the fact that loved ones age, the fact that many kids at least try pot, and so on (this is called being normal). What normal people do not do, though, is to try to fix a problem by compounding it, which getting drunk most surely does. I am new to recovery, somewhere around 165-70 days without a drink, and while life's ususal problems still occur, as problems tend to do, I am finding it much easier to address them now, and am therefore quite a bit happier, even in the knowledge that some problems defy fixing and must best accepted rather than stressed out over. All the best to you, sincerely hoping that you decide not to pick up that bottle. And that the sky is clear for me and you tonight, literally and figuratively All the best to you----Rick

Mark75

I wanted to suggest that possibility, but I think it's a conclusion we must come to ourselves, when it is appropriate to do so.

Good job!!

Justfor1

[QUOTE=Mark75;3624336]I wanted to suggest that possibility, but I think it's a conclusion we must come to ourselves, when it is appropriate to do so.

Some of my pre-relapse behavior is getting very agitated & restless at little things. I haven't been sleeping well either & don't want to eat. All these are signs can be depression also.

LifeBlows

Please don't drink. I have found through bitter experience that when I drink,
-I will not be doing anything about resolving the problems but you are spending money that you could have spent on the car etc on alcohol. It really sucks when you know you could have had the money but its already been wasted.
- Its going to be hard for you to go to your son and say that drugs are bad for you when you are drinking alcoholically.
- When drinking or in drinking mode problems can seem much larger or much more insurmountable than they really are. Please take the chance and try to resolve the problem rather than drink at it.
- Its okay to feel sad, unhappy and overwhelmed. Its what you do about it that counts.
- Give yourself time to process your feelings. What may seem overwhelming or terrible today may just seem like a sucky but manageable situation tomorrow.

Justfor1

I am trying to remember the end result of a bender. Total hopelessness. I will drink for a night & then go get some cocaine to smoke & drink/use for days with no sleep. I will be broke and have to come up with crazy schemes to get more money. I will end up in the hospital or jail almost guaranteed. Believe it or not, at this time in my life I almost prefer jail.

2granddaughters

It doesn't have to be that way .

All the best.

Bob R

TheEnd

It sounds like you have your answer

Justfor1

What a stressful day. I had to deal with my son & the police. He had a "incident" and I fear that this is going to be happening again & again. Going to have to speak to Legal Aid and find out some options. At least it will keep me busy. Another day sober. I'm not sure how long I've been sober & really don't care either. I've quit counting my days & make my days count.

RobC420

Don't be a victim!

north

Most people whether they are alcoholic or not, cope with life's struggles better without booze/drugs.

Consider instead: "My life is a complete joke & the very last thing I need is a drink and I will hold off today."

Elisabeth888

Helping someone else, especially loved ones, is sure to help you too.

Do you journal? Write down the feelings you are having.