not alcoholic enough
Galatians 5:13
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Tampa Bay
Posts: 329
not alcoholic enough
I am sure something like this has been posted before and I hope someone can give me some advice on their experience. Or just an encouraging word that my thoughts are normal. (Normal? What is that? :- ))
I am 47 days sober today. I am reading a lot and educating myself on alcoholism. The more I read, especially personal, tragic stories, I start to doubt my alcoholism.
I know alcoholism is progressive. And even as I write this post, I debate with myself to delete it - Tammy, move on - you're an alcoholic stop asking for permission to drink. :- ) I want to be filled with gratitude that I addressed my alcoholism early enough not to have one of those tragic stories to tell.
I am certain this is the beast jabbering away in my ear. "You weren't that bad. You can drink again; just don't drink every day or so much when you do drink. Go back to the enjoyment of a glass of wine when you want one."
I suppose writing this has helped me some. I don't want to be so immature in my sobriety resolve, but these are real thoughts that cross my mind. I will never drink again and I will never change my mind. <-- that statement feels good and true
Enjoy your Saturday.
I am 47 days sober today. I am reading a lot and educating myself on alcoholism. The more I read, especially personal, tragic stories, I start to doubt my alcoholism.
I know alcoholism is progressive. And even as I write this post, I debate with myself to delete it - Tammy, move on - you're an alcoholic stop asking for permission to drink. :- ) I want to be filled with gratitude that I addressed my alcoholism early enough not to have one of those tragic stories to tell.
I am certain this is the beast jabbering away in my ear. "You weren't that bad. You can drink again; just don't drink every day or so much when you do drink. Go back to the enjoyment of a glass of wine when you want one."
I suppose writing this has helped me some. I don't want to be so immature in my sobriety resolve, but these are real thoughts that cross my mind. I will never drink again and I will never change my mind. <-- that statement feels good and true
Enjoy your Saturday.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Oconomowoc, WI
Posts: 86
I doupted my alcoholism a few weeks ago so I did a controlled experiment and drank. BAD IDEA! If I were not alcoholic I would not have felt like I did about drinking that night. All the red flags went back up and I have been suffering the mental torment ever since. I doubted it several times before but found it easier to accept alcioholism at the time than find out how alcoholic I am. Now I know, I don't drink and I know I am not missing anything great.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: KC MO
Posts: 980
Unfortunately there simply isn't a test you can take that shows positive or negative. It is something you have to decide for yourself,and as you already said. The little devil is on your shoulder trying to sway your decision.
In my case it was pretty clear from the beginning. Get off work. It's time for beer.And not long into my drinking career,if it wasn't there,I was craving it badly.
But as I said,it's something you have to decide for yourself. Losing control,regretting things you did the next morning. But yet we keep doing it.
I don't know if you ever read any of the big book or not. But the guy that likes to jump in front of the bus is a perfect example.
He enjoys jumping in front of buses,and gets out of their way at the last second. Most of the time he gets away with it,and it's a lot of fun. But sometimes he gets hit. Sometimes it's just a scratch,and sometimes he gets clobbered. And sooner or later it will probably kill him if he doesn't stop. But he enjoys it so much he soon forgets about any pain,or problems it causes,and he's back out doing it again.
To me that is a pretty good definition of alcoholism,
Fred
In my case it was pretty clear from the beginning. Get off work. It's time for beer.And not long into my drinking career,if it wasn't there,I was craving it badly.
But as I said,it's something you have to decide for yourself. Losing control,regretting things you did the next morning. But yet we keep doing it.
I don't know if you ever read any of the big book or not. But the guy that likes to jump in front of the bus is a perfect example.
He enjoys jumping in front of buses,and gets out of their way at the last second. Most of the time he gets away with it,and it's a lot of fun. But sometimes he gets hit. Sometimes it's just a scratch,and sometimes he gets clobbered. And sooner or later it will probably kill him if he doesn't stop. But he enjoys it so much he soon forgets about any pain,or problems it causes,and he's back out doing it again.
To me that is a pretty good definition of alcoholism,
Fred
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Tammy, congrats on your sober time, 47 days is becoming a new way of life for you.
The progressive aspect of alcoholism is the same as for every addiction where a tolerance and a dependence is acquired. Even if I never did the journey fueled by heroin or oxycodone, I still know that the body tolerates higher and more frequent doses as the hunger for the next hit increases. I don't think that alcohol is much different.
You are recognizing the beast very clearly as it tells you that you don't need to quit drinking, that now that you have things under control, you can certainly have a glass or two of wine now and then. Classic Alcoholic Voice. Doubts about your need to quit, doubts about your ability to quit, other thoughts which point to drinking again now or later, are AV.
I came to accept these thoughts of drinking now or in the future, Tammy, and throw them in that pile of stinking rotting garbage with my thoughts of drinking in the past. I can start rooting through the mess and keep turning it over in my mind, but there is nothing of value to be found there anymore. I can't dispose of this garbage, but I can leave it alone if I choose to.
I had some dark dark days just like the ones you find here in these pages, you can have them too, but it is not a good place to be. You get to decide if you want them, but I think your sig file nails it. Your sober life has no limits on it, but an alcoholic life is trapped inside that little bottle.
I was scared by that plan of mine at first, to never drink again, but it has become a source of comfort and strength for me now, and it is becoming the same for you. This is a wonderful transformation you have made, Tammy. Thank you for sharing your experience and strength, and for showing that we can choose to be free. Well done.
The progressive aspect of alcoholism is the same as for every addiction where a tolerance and a dependence is acquired. Even if I never did the journey fueled by heroin or oxycodone, I still know that the body tolerates higher and more frequent doses as the hunger for the next hit increases. I don't think that alcohol is much different.
You are recognizing the beast very clearly as it tells you that you don't need to quit drinking, that now that you have things under control, you can certainly have a glass or two of wine now and then. Classic Alcoholic Voice. Doubts about your need to quit, doubts about your ability to quit, other thoughts which point to drinking again now or later, are AV.
I came to accept these thoughts of drinking now or in the future, Tammy, and throw them in that pile of stinking rotting garbage with my thoughts of drinking in the past. I can start rooting through the mess and keep turning it over in my mind, but there is nothing of value to be found there anymore. I can't dispose of this garbage, but I can leave it alone if I choose to.
I had some dark dark days just like the ones you find here in these pages, you can have them too, but it is not a good place to be. You get to decide if you want them, but I think your sig file nails it. Your sober life has no limits on it, but an alcoholic life is trapped inside that little bottle.
I was scared by that plan of mine at first, to never drink again, but it has become a source of comfort and strength for me now, and it is becoming the same for you. This is a wonderful transformation you have made, Tammy. Thank you for sharing your experience and strength, and for showing that we can choose to be free. Well done.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Overseas... on the shore of an uncharted desert isle.
Posts: 254
Maybe I was a bit like you. I did not drink every day - but when I did, it was according to a pattern common to many of us on this board -- "one or two was never enough" and once I hit my stride (maybe the 5th or 7th drink), regardless of my previous resolve to just have a few, I drank my fill to keep that high feeling as long as I could. And, I never really had a "rock bottom" where I lost my job, family or was in trouble with the law over a DUI or drunken fight.
However I had plenty of regrets due to drinking. Hangovers and looking haggard for a day or two afterward. Lots of partial blackouts to the point I took them for granted. Only a few people seemed critical of my drinking - as far as I could notice (although now I recognize I would have been blind to most subtle signals).
And, even my Better Half to this day really doesn't believe I was/am an alcoholic - "just a problem drinker" - didn't think I needed to stop completely and encouraged me to consider having 1 or 2 drinks. However, she respects my decision to abstain and after more than 3.5 years of sobriety, she at least understands I am better off -waay better off - as a teetotaler.
And, even my friend who took me to my first AA meeting but was frustrated how I decided that "doing the Steps" was not for me and was certain I would relapse (but did not ) eventually indicated "... well, maybe you're were not a real alcoholic after all". In this case, I guess my stubborn streak helped -- I didn't care what he thought (I assumed he was very much into his own AA ideology), or much anything else. It was a hard first month of going sober psychologically, I knew the difference being sober made to me - both physically & mentally, so there was no way I was going back to drinking even with the most gentle invitations to do so.
Sometimes when I get a "spidey sense", I come to this site, or attend an AA meeting (once when I was in a city where my drinking history was rich and deep, I ran to a meeting) or talk to a friend.
However I had plenty of regrets due to drinking. Hangovers and looking haggard for a day or two afterward. Lots of partial blackouts to the point I took them for granted. Only a few people seemed critical of my drinking - as far as I could notice (although now I recognize I would have been blind to most subtle signals).
And, even my Better Half to this day really doesn't believe I was/am an alcoholic - "just a problem drinker" - didn't think I needed to stop completely and encouraged me to consider having 1 or 2 drinks. However, she respects my decision to abstain and after more than 3.5 years of sobriety, she at least understands I am better off -waay better off - as a teetotaler.
And, even my friend who took me to my first AA meeting but was frustrated how I decided that "doing the Steps" was not for me and was certain I would relapse (but did not ) eventually indicated "... well, maybe you're were not a real alcoholic after all". In this case, I guess my stubborn streak helped -- I didn't care what he thought (I assumed he was very much into his own AA ideology), or much anything else. It was a hard first month of going sober psychologically, I knew the difference being sober made to me - both physically & mentally, so there was no way I was going back to drinking even with the most gentle invitations to do so.
Sometimes when I get a "spidey sense", I come to this site, or attend an AA meeting (once when I was in a city where my drinking history was rich and deep, I ran to a meeting) or talk to a friend.
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Originally Posted by tammy711 
I am sure something like this has been posted before and I hope someone can give me some advice on their experience. Or just an encouraging word that my thoughts are normal. (Normal? What is that? :- ))
I am 47 days sober today. I am reading a lot and educating myself on alcoholism. The more I read, especially personal, tragic stories, I start to doubt my alcoholism.
I know alcoholism is progressive. And even as I write this post, I debate with myself to delete it - Tammy, move on - you're an alcoholic stop asking for permission to drink. :- ) I want to be filled with gratitude that I addressed my alcoholism early enough not to have one of those tragic stories to tell.
I am certain this is the beast jabbering away in my ear. "You weren't that bad. You can drink again; just don't drink every day or so much when you do drink. Go back to the enjoyment of a glass of wine when you want one."
I suppose writing this has helped me some. I don't want to be so immature in my sobriety resolve, but these are real thoughts that cross my mind. I will never drink again and I will never change my mind. <-- that statement feels good and true
Enjoy your Saturday.
I am 47 days sober today. I am reading a lot and educating myself on alcoholism. The more I read, especially personal, tragic stories, I start to doubt my alcoholism.
I know alcoholism is progressive. And even as I write this post, I debate with myself to delete it - Tammy, move on - you're an alcoholic stop asking for permission to drink. :- ) I want to be filled with gratitude that I addressed my alcoholism early enough not to have one of those tragic stories to tell.
I am certain this is the beast jabbering away in my ear. "You weren't that bad. You can drink again; just don't drink every day or so much when you do drink. Go back to the enjoyment of a glass of wine when you want one."
I suppose writing this has helped me some. I don't want to be so immature in my sobriety resolve, but these are real thoughts that cross my mind. I will never drink again and I will never change my mind. <-- that statement feels good and true
Enjoy your Saturday.
In AA, of course it matters, as alcoholism is recognised as an illness of spirit, mind, and body, as defined by AA.
Being, or not being an alcoholic is absolutely a choice made by an individual for his or hers own understanding.
Myself, I'm a recovered alcoholic drug addict. I'm also, by definiton, a non-drinker. I live a spiritual sober life. My alcoholism is as defined by AA. I practice AVRT skills as required. My Big Plan was made before my first AA meeting. I've completed my AA 12 steps decades ago, and have received the promises, as promised. I also make use of Gestalt therapy. I also make abundant use of common sense too, lol. Finally, I learn from self-experience, from success and failure, and I learn from the experiences of others...
What's there not to love?
All doubts should be recognised as Addictive Voice...
Yeah, its shaping up to be a fantastic Saturday.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 64
I am a little remiss to respond to this- as I have about 48 day under my belt as well and there are so many that have so much more sober time and wisdom, but here it goes. I was a nightly wine drinker- never in the day and very high functioning - so I thought. I have not anything bad happen to me either- yet........
"Yet" is something I have gleaned from many posts here. I wonder how many wish they would have quite at the stage we are at. At the stage where you are on the fence about whether you really have a problem or are you just drinking too much. This is beast activity at it's best.
I know for me- my "problems" that have come from my drinking have been subtle. In the past my kids would ask me if I am "tired"- hungover in child speak. My kids would ask me before they take a sip of my drink or if it is my grown up drink. I actually went shopping for some fall clothes yesterday and realized I haven't really done that in five years. Not because I am so busy with work and family, but because I am usually too hungover and tired to really care- workout clothes are easier to nap in. One of my children couldn't wake me last year when she was having an asthma attack- she went back to her room and laid still.
Little by little my life was deteriorating. It is glaringly obvious to me now. My kids now seek me out at night to talk and "chill." I hear my kids get up at night when they need me. I drink what they drink. I look better and care about myself again. You see my point. All this in only 47 days! Miracle!
Your beast is messing with you. My beast is learning very fast that when she plays the "you don't really have a drinking problem" card - I will remind her of the desperate day I joined SR. People that don't have a drinking problem don't look for a recovery website.
This slams the steel door shut on her. Dialogue ended.
"Yet" is something I have gleaned from many posts here. I wonder how many wish they would have quite at the stage we are at. At the stage where you are on the fence about whether you really have a problem or are you just drinking too much. This is beast activity at it's best.
I know for me- my "problems" that have come from my drinking have been subtle. In the past my kids would ask me if I am "tired"- hungover in child speak. My kids would ask me before they take a sip of my drink or if it is my grown up drink. I actually went shopping for some fall clothes yesterday and realized I haven't really done that in five years. Not because I am so busy with work and family, but because I am usually too hungover and tired to really care- workout clothes are easier to nap in. One of my children couldn't wake me last year when she was having an asthma attack- she went back to her room and laid still.
Little by little my life was deteriorating. It is glaringly obvious to me now. My kids now seek me out at night to talk and "chill." I hear my kids get up at night when they need me. I drink what they drink. I look better and care about myself again. You see my point. All this in only 47 days! Miracle!
Your beast is messing with you. My beast is learning very fast that when she plays the "you don't really have a drinking problem" card - I will remind her of the desperate day I joined SR. People that don't have a drinking problem don't look for a recovery website.
This slams the steel door shut on her. Dialogue ended.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Florida US
Posts: 296
Hello Tammy:
During my first sober period which lasted over 6 years, I often doubted that I was a 'real' alcoholocic, specially when I heard tragic stories. I think that happens to a some of us. Tragic stories reinforce the resolve to never drink again in some and have the opposite effect for others.
I was not planning to drink when I did drink after 6 1/2 years and I think these ocassionnal unaddressed doubts had a lot to do with that.
I looked at the origin of my doubts and found that they are helpless thoughts that form in my head like thousand of others during the course of a day. They really are just powerless thoughts that need to be infused with our choice to act on them in order to gain strength. Don't make them strong.
The way I see it is that I cant have the life I want and my children deserve if I choose to drink. The quality of my life and safety of my children goes up 1000000000000% when alcohol is not part of it. The fact that I have relapsed twice after realizing this tells me that I should not pay any attention to the thoughts that make me doubt that I am a real alcoholic I know alcohol is poisonous to me and makes me do and say things I never would if sober. If that makes me an alcoholic, fine. I do not label me that or use the term often, but there is something Very very abnormal about the effect alcohol has on me. I know this is called alcoholism and it's progressive.
Congratulations on your 47 days. Thats no easy task for a daily wine drinker. I went from binge drinking rum and diet cokes in my 20's and 30's to daily wine comsumption in my 40's. You are way over the bump. Now find ways to keep what you have accomplished. This forum is great and does teach you the different methods and tools people use to stay sober but you have to have a plan of action in your real life.
You will learn what works and not work for you. I trust my instinct. My last relapse happened two days after I accepted a Valium prescrition from my doc for jaw pain in the morning due to teeth grinding during sleep. My instinct knew I should have said no I can't take those pills, they jeopardize my sobriety but I ignored my instinct. I knew from this forum and other sources that benzos are dangerous to one's sobriety. The Valium made everything so peachy that somehow the reasons whY I didn't drink didn't seem very important to me anymore.
Again congrats on 47 days.
During my first sober period which lasted over 6 years, I often doubted that I was a 'real' alcoholocic, specially when I heard tragic stories. I think that happens to a some of us. Tragic stories reinforce the resolve to never drink again in some and have the opposite effect for others.
I was not planning to drink when I did drink after 6 1/2 years and I think these ocassionnal unaddressed doubts had a lot to do with that.
I looked at the origin of my doubts and found that they are helpless thoughts that form in my head like thousand of others during the course of a day. They really are just powerless thoughts that need to be infused with our choice to act on them in order to gain strength. Don't make them strong.
The way I see it is that I cant have the life I want and my children deserve if I choose to drink. The quality of my life and safety of my children goes up 1000000000000% when alcohol is not part of it. The fact that I have relapsed twice after realizing this tells me that I should not pay any attention to the thoughts that make me doubt that I am a real alcoholic I know alcohol is poisonous to me and makes me do and say things I never would if sober. If that makes me an alcoholic, fine. I do not label me that or use the term often, but there is something Very very abnormal about the effect alcohol has on me. I know this is called alcoholism and it's progressive.
Congratulations on your 47 days. Thats no easy task for a daily wine drinker. I went from binge drinking rum and diet cokes in my 20's and 30's to daily wine comsumption in my 40's. You are way over the bump. Now find ways to keep what you have accomplished. This forum is great and does teach you the different methods and tools people use to stay sober but you have to have a plan of action in your real life.
You will learn what works and not work for you. I trust my instinct. My last relapse happened two days after I accepted a Valium prescrition from my doc for jaw pain in the morning due to teeth grinding during sleep. My instinct knew I should have said no I can't take those pills, they jeopardize my sobriety but I ignored my instinct. I knew from this forum and other sources that benzos are dangerous to one's sobriety. The Valium made everything so peachy that somehow the reasons whY I didn't drink didn't seem very important to me anymore.
Again congrats on 47 days.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 64
I had some dark dark days just like the ones you find here in these pages, you can have them too, but it is not a good place to be. You get to decide if you want them, but I think your sig file nails it. Your sober life has no limits on it, but an alcoholic life is trapped inside that little bottle.
This is really good freshstart Thank you.
This is really good freshstart Thank you.
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Tammy, you can kick your AVRT up a notch by doing just what NatalieN has done, she has chosen to make drinking ever again a question of morality for her.
I chose to do the same, to decide that drinking for me now is immoral, and goes against my core values and beliefs, against my heart and soul. I did that by remembering my impaired driving, and linking it to the experience of a friend who lost her husband and infant daughter to a drunk driver. Making morality part of your Big Plan seals the deal on identifying and dealing with that AV.
The way I see it is that I cant have the life I want and my children deserve if I choose to drink. The quality of my life and safety of my children goes up 1000000000000% when alcohol is not part of it.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Paris, France
Posts: 79
Tammy, I don't know if this is a common phrase but I heard once:
"If you are an alcoholic, you have no business drinking. If you aren't an alcoholic, not drinking isn't a problem."
Either way, why not not drink?
"If you are an alcoholic, you have no business drinking. If you aren't an alcoholic, not drinking isn't a problem."
Either way, why not not drink?
Galatians 5:13
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Tampa Bay
Posts: 329
Thank you once again SR friends. I reach out for answers and maybe even for comfort and you never fail to exceed my expectations. Thank you so very much everyone for taking the time to read my post and leave a thoughtful response.
I am very grateful and I hope I can begin sharing some wisdom with others soon. I try to now, but don't think I have that much to offer just yet.
ashbyee: I like how close in # of days we share in common. Let's stay in touch!
Thanks again everyone!
I am very grateful and I hope I can begin sharing some wisdom with others soon. I try to now, but don't think I have that much to offer just yet.
ashbyee: I like how close in # of days we share in common. Let's stay in touch!
Thanks again everyone!
Sally1009
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 467
Hi Tammy,
I used to feel like you at times, before my drinking escalated to the horrendous proportions it did by this summer. I thought I was just a little bit alcoholic. But I've come to believe that you can't be a little bit alcoholic any more than you can be a little bit pregnant. It's one or the other. And its progressive.
I too haven't had a DUI. But I'm ashamed to say I've driven drunk. I haven't been homeless - yet. I haven't been to jail. Yet. But I have done enough crazy things to know I can't drink again. It ALWAYS gets worse, never better.
If you have a copy of the Big Book, read the the stories in the section "They Stopped In Time". You might find it helpful.
Congratulations on your sober time.
I used to feel like you at times, before my drinking escalated to the horrendous proportions it did by this summer. I thought I was just a little bit alcoholic. But I've come to believe that you can't be a little bit alcoholic any more than you can be a little bit pregnant. It's one or the other. And its progressive.
I too haven't had a DUI. But I'm ashamed to say I've driven drunk. I haven't been homeless - yet. I haven't been to jail. Yet. But I have done enough crazy things to know I can't drink again. It ALWAYS gets worse, never better.
If you have a copy of the Big Book, read the the stories in the section "They Stopped In Time". You might find it helpful.
Congratulations on your sober time.
Member of SMART Recovery
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 1,722
Tammy, we were just talking on another thread about using the term "alcoholic". On that thread I shared why I personally do not use that term about myself--although I was a daily, blackout drinker for about 25 years.
This thread brings up another reason I don't use the term--because it bothers me to see so many folks twisting themselves up into knots trying to decide if they "qualify" for the label. This is made even worse by the fact that there isn't even a definition of what an "alcoholic" is that we can all agree on! (I'm sure you've already run across some threads where people argue on and on about what a "real alcoholic" is!)
I say: who cares about labels?!? Instead, focus on whether you are happy with the role alcohol is playing in your life--and if not, what you can do to change that. You'll find no shortage of different ideas on how to do that on this site!
This thread brings up another reason I don't use the term--because it bothers me to see so many folks twisting themselves up into knots trying to decide if they "qualify" for the label. This is made even worse by the fact that there isn't even a definition of what an "alcoholic" is that we can all agree on! (I'm sure you've already run across some threads where people argue on and on about what a "real alcoholic" is!)
I say: who cares about labels?!? Instead, focus on whether you are happy with the role alcohol is playing in your life--and if not, what you can do to change that. You'll find no shortage of different ideas on how to do that on this site!
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by tammy711
I am certain this is the beast jabbering away in my ear. "You weren't that bad. You can drink again; just don't drink every day or so much when you do drink. Go back to the enjoyment of a glass of wine when you want one."
For some, the monkey is just a 6 oz. grinder monkey and for others it is a 900 lb. gorilla. If you are like me, you will start off assuming it is little monkey and try to handle it all by yourself. If you're right, psychological tricks & tips will do the job.
However, if you're wrong, it will take a power greater than yourself to do the job for you. Only time will tell.
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
For me, it doesn't matter how big that monkey gets, just two weeks ago it was King Kong. I visited that place and time of year where I first learned 20 years ago to drink all day every day, 25 to 30 units, starting with screwdrivers and bloodymarys for breakfast. It was all there, old old friends, a campfire, great music and a rising full moon. I let him rattle and roar, but in the end, it didn't matter because King Kong only had the power I gave him. I had made my choice long ago.
I know that you can do the same, too, Tammy. That power is yours, and nothing can take it away from you.
I know that you can do the same, too, Tammy. That power is yours, and nothing can take it away from you.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Perth, Australia
Posts: 24
I had the same problem - maybe I'm just a heavy drinker - since so far I 'get away with it'. This is sheer luck, as I drink and drive about once per week.
One of the things that helped me realise is a good friend (a neighbour and drinking buddy) is an alcoholic who is a few years further down the track than me. Her life revolves around hanging around with friends drinking cheap wine, her house is a mess, her kids have to look after themselves, she shakes in front of the other mums at school drop off in the mornings, she looks sick, you can actually see her enlarged liver, doctors have told her she has a fatty liver, she drunk dials me so often that I don't pick up the phone when I see her number in the evening since I know she won't even remember a word of the conversation, it is affecting her marriage, every social event she goes to she gets so drunk she needs help to walk....Anyways, I see myself there in a few years, easily. It is a progressive thing, always. Do you have any friends who are similar people to you, and are further down the path than you and you can see clearly where you are headed? So even if you think you are alright now, you can see that it won't stay the same forever.
One of the things that helped me realise is a good friend (a neighbour and drinking buddy) is an alcoholic who is a few years further down the track than me. Her life revolves around hanging around with friends drinking cheap wine, her house is a mess, her kids have to look after themselves, she shakes in front of the other mums at school drop off in the mornings, she looks sick, you can actually see her enlarged liver, doctors have told her she has a fatty liver, she drunk dials me so often that I don't pick up the phone when I see her number in the evening since I know she won't even remember a word of the conversation, it is affecting her marriage, every social event she goes to she gets so drunk she needs help to walk....Anyways, I see myself there in a few years, easily. It is a progressive thing, always. Do you have any friends who are similar people to you, and are further down the path than you and you can see clearly where you are headed? So even if you think you are alright now, you can see that it won't stay the same forever.
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