Binge drinking
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Ontario
Posts: 806
Originally Posted by binge1 
My problem is binge drinking.
Almost every time I go for a night out I end up drinking way too much. I start off drinking pints of strong lager usually 8-10 pints then I start drinking double measures of spirits for the rest of the night, I probably get through 10 or more.
I feel incapable of going out and just having one drink.
The end result of all this drinking is my behaviour becomes quite bad, I embarrass myself and I probably end up annoying people. It is clear to everyone that I am very drunk.
The worst part of this is the next morning, I wake up and immediately I feel an overwhelming sense fear and embarrassment that makes me feel physically ill to the bottom of my stomach. I have a complete melt down.
I never remember getting home and my memory of the night before is hazy with parts missing. I fear the worst and call people that were out with me to find out what happened during the night out. Most of the time I am told I was fine and there’s nothing to worry about but this offers no comfort as people can’t be with me all of the time.
This feeling lasts days after the night out and makes me feel suicidal.
I can’t shake off these feelings and I don’t know how to change this, it would be a lot easier if I didn’t care what people may think about me. How do I get over this feeling?
I need to quit drinking completely as I don’t feel I can trust myself to drink in moderation.
Almost every time I go for a night out I end up drinking way too much. I start off drinking pints of strong lager usually 8-10 pints then I start drinking double measures of spirits for the rest of the night, I probably get through 10 or more.
I feel incapable of going out and just having one drink.
The end result of all this drinking is my behaviour becomes quite bad, I embarrass myself and I probably end up annoying people. It is clear to everyone that I am very drunk.
The worst part of this is the next morning, I wake up and immediately I feel an overwhelming sense fear and embarrassment that makes me feel physically ill to the bottom of my stomach. I have a complete melt down.
I never remember getting home and my memory of the night before is hazy with parts missing. I fear the worst and call people that were out with me to find out what happened during the night out. Most of the time I am told I was fine and there’s nothing to worry about but this offers no comfort as people can’t be with me all of the time.
This feeling lasts days after the night out and makes me feel suicidal.
I can’t shake off these feelings and I don’t know how to change this, it would be a lot easier if I didn’t care what people may think about me. How do I get over this feeling?
I need to quit drinking completely as I don’t feel I can trust myself to drink in moderation.
Movies don't serve booze!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 5
Originally Posted by MarkstheSpot
This was exactly how I used to feel, and just the reaction I used to get, too. And of course it ends up becoming a vicious circle: I was a 'legend', 'hardcore', a real party animal, and of course I ended up playing up to it, as though everybody has a role in life and that was mine.
I've only recently given it up -- I'm Class of March -- so I'm still at that weird wobbly stage, but one of thoughts that keeps clobbering me is I wish I'd given it up sooner.
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I've only recently given it up -- I'm Class of March -- so I'm still at that weird wobbly stage, but one of thoughts that keeps clobbering me is I wish I'd given it up sooner.
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Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 260
How are you feeling about things today, Binge1? If you're anything like me you'll be over the hangover and starting to minimise it all in your head. You may even be feeling a bit shame-faced, like you over-reacted coming on here and opening up about it. I'm not saying that's how you are feeling, but that's how I would have been. You didn't, by the way. Over-react, I mean.
One of the things I've realised about giving up is that while I may dread going to parties sober, there were loads of things I used to dread anyway, the really big events, like stag nights or music festivals, because I knew I'd be drinking like a witch and the potential for badness was so great.
The last big rave I went to I got in such a terrible state it was one of the worst nights of my life, and there's some pretty stiff competition in that category. The last couple of stag nights I've been invited to I've swerved because I literally didn't think I'd survive that level of drink and drugs -- something too bad would have happened. So I'd end up drinking at home, because it was safer. It's only really now that I realise how ludicrous all this was. Where was all the fun I was supposed to be having?
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One of the things I've realised about giving up is that while I may dread going to parties sober, there were loads of things I used to dread anyway, the really big events, like stag nights or music festivals, because I knew I'd be drinking like a witch and the potential for badness was so great.
The last big rave I went to I got in such a terrible state it was one of the worst nights of my life, and there's some pretty stiff competition in that category. The last couple of stag nights I've been invited to I've swerved because I literally didn't think I'd survive that level of drink and drugs -- something too bad would have happened. So I'd end up drinking at home, because it was safer. It's only really now that I realise how ludicrous all this was. Where was all the fun I was supposed to be having?
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Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,071
Hey Binge1. Your drinking reminds me so much of how I used to be - I felt sick to my stomach when I was reading your post because it sounded so familiar. There is a better way to live - why not give it a test drive?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 5
Originally Posted by GirlFromCO
Hey Binge1. Your drinking reminds me so much of how I used to be - I felt sick to my stomach when I was reading your post because it sounded so familiar. There is a better way to live - why not give it a test drive?
I found out yesterday from catching up with everyone from the night out that I didn't do anything wrong but the feeling I had Sunday is enough to stop me drinking.
I will give it a test drive.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 260
Originally Posted by binge1
It's not nice, I still feel sick about it now. I had a feeling of an empty stomach since Sunday.
I found out yesterday from catching up with everyone from the night out that I didn't do anything wrong but the feeling I had Sunday is enough to stop me drinking.
I will give it a test drive.
I found out yesterday from catching up with everyone from the night out that I didn't do anything wrong but the feeling I had Sunday is enough to stop me drinking.
I will give it a test drive.
The people I envy most on this site are those who realised they had a problem and gave up, because I so wish I had. Me, I needed a precipitating event to wake me up to the full extent of the problem. It wasn't as bad as it could have been, but it was enough. It's here if you want to read about it. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post3332828
You sound like you're wavering to me, but please don't. Be serious about your test drive. Stick around here, where there are voices to balance out the constant isn't-boozing-great, it's-all-just-a-laugh tirade you get out there. After a fortnight off the booze you'll look better, you'll feel better, you'll start looking at the world with new eyes, and if you're anything like me, your only regret will be that you didn't do it sooner.
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Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Houston
Posts: 309
I was a binger too. I remember exactly how that felt. Please stick around, check out meetings in your area. Like anything new, it's very uncomfortable at first, but it will change your life in ways you never thought possible. We've all been right where you are. It gets better. I promise.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Hollywood, CA
Posts: 11
I'm on Day 3 of self loathing from a horrible incident this weekend. I don't know if I 'got away with it' or not because I'm avoiding every single person that I was with. I have absolutely no memory of what went down, just a few text messages from Sunday night saying things like 'dude, wtf is wrong with you?' and 'you fell down at the bar, haha, you effin' moron.'
I went to my first ever AA meeting yesterday and going to another one tonight. I'm not addicted to alcohol but when I do drink, look out. I get destroyed and I'm a mouthy a'hole. I know that in the days to come I'll feel better but I don't want to ever forget how I've felt the past couple of days. I've known for a long time that drinking and me is not a good mix, I end up pissing people off, lose their respect and sink into a multiple day depression the morning after every time...and yet I still do it.
It's funny. I think sometimes my friends and I go to the bar and drink to meet girls and the exact opposite things that women find attractive happen. You act like a drunk moron, you spend your money on booze rather than things like nice clothes and you look like a bloated jerkoff. Being sober, dressing nice and looking nice would definitely put myself in a better position to meet someone, advance in my career and be an all around happier person.
I hope I take my own advice this time.
I went to my first ever AA meeting yesterday and going to another one tonight. I'm not addicted to alcohol but when I do drink, look out. I get destroyed and I'm a mouthy a'hole. I know that in the days to come I'll feel better but I don't want to ever forget how I've felt the past couple of days. I've known for a long time that drinking and me is not a good mix, I end up pissing people off, lose their respect and sink into a multiple day depression the morning after every time...and yet I still do it.
It's funny. I think sometimes my friends and I go to the bar and drink to meet girls and the exact opposite things that women find attractive happen. You act like a drunk moron, you spend your money on booze rather than things like nice clothes and you look like a bloated jerkoff. Being sober, dressing nice and looking nice would definitely put myself in a better position to meet someone, advance in my career and be an all around happier person.
I hope I take my own advice this time.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New York
Posts: 10
Hey Binge thanks for posting, like you I had a binge this weekend which started as a fun time with friends friday and extended to constant drinking until tuesday morning because my body hurt so much. Monday night and tuesday night were constant cold sweats, not a wink and sleep, and couldnt eat for two days because of lack of appetite and because I gagged everytime because my GI tract was so swollen from puking.
Only today did I force down food with my fingers and gulp water did I start to find a little better. To that point I realized I cannot let this happen again. My problem has been alcohol "abuse" on binges which puts me on quite a bender. Theyre starting to effect work and my relationships so I had a enough and set up a time with the Doc tomorrow to help me talk through and prevent this from happened. If you have no one else to talk to about it like me (why you're probably posting it online) id recommend that too.
Only today did I force down food with my fingers and gulp water did I start to find a little better. To that point I realized I cannot let this happen again. My problem has been alcohol "abuse" on binges which puts me on quite a bender. Theyre starting to effect work and my relationships so I had a enough and set up a time with the Doc tomorrow to help me talk through and prevent this from happened. If you have no one else to talk to about it like me (why you're probably posting it online) id recommend that too.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 2,308
same here binge1 - been there done that. Calling others to see what happened, or when that was too difficult, head in sand approach - because it did get to the point where I just couldn't bear to hear what had transpired. I frequently heard statements like "you were so drunk last night" or "do you remember saying or doing xxx?" Ugh.
Thankfully, all of us here have a chance to start over if we want it. Maybe you are known as the party guy now, but sober up for a while and you will be known as the guy who got his sh*t together. You do not have to keep living that way and I hope you are inspired to reinvent yourself.
Thankfully, all of us here have a chance to start over if we want it. Maybe you are known as the party guy now, but sober up for a while and you will be known as the guy who got his sh*t together. You do not have to keep living that way and I hope you are inspired to reinvent yourself.
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