BackToSquareOne

Someone else brought this up in a different thread and it really hit home with me. I think that alcohol and all its related issues often become scapegoats for many problems that have nothing to do with alcohol.

If you really think about it, since the beginning of time people have done incredibly stupid things, drunk or sober. Do the thing drunk and you have a built in excuse, do the same thing sober and you're, well....just stupid.

The way every problem under the sun seems to get labeled as "untreated alcoholism" if your an alcoholic, but the same issues are just "problems" if you're not an alcoholic seems a bit strange.

Does anyone else think that we as a society get a little too carried away in demonizing alcohol? It does seem to be a handy little "one size fits all" demon that can often keep us from looking behind the curtains and figuring out what the real problems are.

WineyWinerton

Excellent point! I have never really thought of it that way but you're right. We live in a blaming society and look to pin the blame on the first logical excuse. I'm sure I have more to say about this but I need to think about it some more!

Zee

I totally agree. Who made up the definition of an alcoholic anyway? If you have 3 drinks a day, you are normal, but if you have 4, you are an alcoholic.
For example, I have just been watching a programme on the tv about a brain surgeon that gives up his time to treat people in the Ukrane for free... good for him etc, pat on back etc but every time he was being intervied at his house, he was sitting next to a laden drinks tray, quaffing red wine. Is he an alcoholic? Hhhmmm, it sure is a can of worms!

scrambled2012

Society does get carried away, however I know for a fact, the event that prompted me to stop drinking was 100% caused by alcohol. I also know for a fact that before that event took place, I was drinking on a daily basis.

So for me, I needed to stop drinking, 100%. Other root causes? Sure. But using alcohol to deal with them is not an option, at least not for me.

soberlicious

Well, it was me who put the alcohol in my body, so alcohol is not to blame...I am. I still do stupid stuff without booze, but I can say that my stupid stuff is, by leaps and bounds, less serious and less frequent than while drinking.

macknacat

well first- i don't believe i am gonna make much progress as long as i am under any the influence of a mind changing chemical- now we can all argue about the definition of "progress" but if part of the process of getting thru "issues" involves "thinking"- well then I believe I better bring as many healthy active gray matter cells to the table as possible...

And then there is the fact that my last 16 yrs of sobriety are light years better than my first 26 years of drinking/using

UpperbucksAAguy

Yes- Every bad thing that goes on is not because of alcoholic/addict behavior.

awuh1

Reminds me of the "Wizard of OZ" when the wizard says "pay no attention to that man behind the curtain". Alcoholism takes hold of real people who often want to project themselves as being much different than they truly are. Hence the need for honesty in just about any program you work.

I think honest expression of vulnerabilities can also give us strength.

LosingmyMisery

I had problems and drank. My problems got worse. My drinking was a symptom of my problems, but I exchanged one set of problems for new ones. Once I decided to quit drinking, I took a look at my core issues and worked on my problems. I am a different person today. I can function well, most days, and don't wake up embarrassed by what I said or did the night before. Sheesh, I don't miss that. Knowing what I now know, when someone does something stupid while drinking, I don't cut them any slack. Bad behavior is bad behavior regardless of whether they were drinking, drunk or can't remember what they did. That is how I look at it anyways. Accountability is important to me these days.

Justfor1

Thank you for posting a excellent topic. I believe that when domestic violence is concerned alcohol can make it worse but does not necessarily cause it. Hope that made some sense.

NewBeginning010

Personally every one of my worst mistakes/stupid things I have done was under the influence of alcohol. I have a feeling that if you are feeling like everything is blamed unfairly on alcoholism that on some level you have issues with alcohol that have caused you to feel that way mixed with some resentment towards the alcoholism itself.

That being said I will say that I believe that alcohol is one of the most damaging substances to society/people in many ways, then again I may be slightly biased ;-)

midgetcop

Good topic.

I guess it's hard to know whether alcohol is to blame for life's problems while using. But like soberlicious said, it was *me* who put the alcohol in my body, so it's kinda a moot point. Either way I'm accountable, and blaming alcoholism is trying to deflect blame in a way.

I CAN say that I'm much better at dealing with my problems now. But I haven't turned into some magical unicorn just because I stopped drinking...






....not sure why I used a unicorn as an example, but it was the first thing that popped into my head. :crazy

NewBeginning010

lol... the unicorn made me laugh ;-) Its good though as I havnt seen any drunk unicorns... lately anyway ;-)

Sapling

Not sure what society thinks....I look at it as a demon that destroyed my life....But if it wasn't for that demon...I never would have looked behind that curtain and figured out what my real problems were...And dealt with them..

RobbyRobot

I think society gets carried away with romancing alcohol as a social scene. Sans alcohol socially and society deems the function boring and dull.

I also think that social drinking survives without earning a negative value within society. Society promotes responsible social drinking. A person can journey from responsible social drinker, too problem drinker, too alcoholic, too whatever. The act and function of social drinking itself remains untouchable and the pinnacle of social acheivement and refinement in our western society.

I'm not against social drinking, lol. I was never social about it, you know? so social drinking never interfered with my past drinking.

I just know alot of so-called labeled social drinking within our society is not actually social either. Often times just another accepted way to get that drink into the drinkers hand and wear that social smile and bottoms up. "Social drinking" enjoys a broad and generalized understanding in our society.

So, is alcohol overly demonised?
No, not so much.

InsertNameHere

I am not sure if I was the one that inspired this thread or not but this is what I posted yesterday, on this subject.

BackToSquareOne

Originally Posted by InsertNameHere
Did some reading and came up with the thought that I might be using alcohol as a "scapegoat", I think I am blaming all of lifes difficulties on the fact that I drink. I know that not everything will be "fixed" if I stop but thinking that all that I am doing or not doing that i should be is because I am drinking is false as well. So I may have quite a few areas of my life to fix and I realize now that they aren't all "because I drink" they are a part of who I am. Thoughts like this are fleeting for me though and I very well might change my mind or "forget" that eventually.




Yes, it was not only your post but the insight you show in understanding that quitting alcohol is only one part of the equation. It has to be dealt with, that goes without saying but it's only one piece of the puzzle as you expressed so well.

From my own experience with rehab in the 90's here's what I found. Most people who attended those things had amassed quite a collection of problems, alcohol/drugs, legal trouble, anxiety/depression, PTSD and a lot of other mental health issues were quite common. An unhappiness with career paths, lot in life, spouse or just day to day life in general was not that unusual, in fact you could say it was the norm.

You could argue that the one bright spot in many of the lives of this group was their escapades with drugs/alcohol. Take that away and you're removing the one thing they found that actually seemed to work in their lives. Taking something away without replacing it with something else usually does not work out that well. The failure rates of most forms of treatment speak for themselves.

The focus needs to be on what's behind the curtain, not so much the substances that make bearable whatever it is that's hiding back there.

InsertNameHere

Man can I relate to that, drinking being the only bright spot in my life anyway. Other than that most people would hate to live the way I do, but that is my fault as well. I guess that is why giving up alcohol has been so much trouble for me. 1) it is one of the few things that I enjoy doing, 2) on this threads subject it is my excuse for failure, "oh its okay that you are doing poorly in life you are an alcoholic after all and they have problems." I don't think I was really aware that I was doing this till I posted that but now think that is deffinetly the case. Alcohol is my way out of responsibility even when I am not drunk. Maybe this will help someone else in the same situation think of that, so thanks SquareOne.

Stang

I don't see where it's demonized at all. Seems to me like alcohol is promoted in our culture.

BackToSquareOne

Yes, you're correct in that society for the most part does glamorise the use of alcohol. It's used as a reward for almost any situation, win, lose or draw... celebrate with alcohol, anything was a good enough reason for me.

I guess what I was getting at in this post was how the alcoholic often either consciously or subliminally uses the alcoholic label as an excuse for almost everything that's wrong with their life. It's kind of neat and tidy, you just take the alcoholic - alcohol demon file folder and toss all your character defects in there. Instead of a few thousand seperate problems you now have one big one "alcoholism".

If you procrastinate, put things off forever and a day because you can, that's ok, remember you're an alcoholic. Just toss that issue in the alcohol demon file folder, you'll get around to dealing with it some day so no worries.

I actually fell prey to this delusion to the extent that when I gave up my 3 decades of drinking I actually believed that all my other problems would magically sort themselves out. Guess what? They didn't, in fact the only thing that really changed was that I was no longer drinking!! Talk about being bummed out! That was the let down of all let downs!

Seriously tho, quitting alcohol is only the beginning, all the other stuff behind the curtain, that's the journey, make yours a good one!