Expectations from a DUI
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 2,349
Expectations from a DUI
My AH got an extreme DUI a few days ago. I figured maybe some of you on here can shed some light or your experiences.
It was his first offense, his license is suspended for now, and he's aware that he may do jail time. What is frightening to him the most is the possibility of losing his job and all that goes along with losing your income. He is very depressed right now and will be calling on lawyer's tomorrow. I don't know what to expect, nor does he, since we've never had run ins with the law before. He has been talking about suicide or that I should leave him and take our son because it's not fair that we have to go down with him, to some degree. While that may be true, I think he's going overboard and I know it's all part of his remorseful stage where he's beating himself up. Anyway, getting back on topic here, any suggestions for handling the DUI?
It was his first offense, his license is suspended for now, and he's aware that he may do jail time. What is frightening to him the most is the possibility of losing his job and all that goes along with losing your income. He is very depressed right now and will be calling on lawyer's tomorrow. I don't know what to expect, nor does he, since we've never had run ins with the law before. He has been talking about suicide or that I should leave him and take our son because it's not fair that we have to go down with him, to some degree. While that may be true, I think he's going overboard and I know it's all part of his remorseful stage where he's beating himself up. Anyway, getting back on topic here, any suggestions for handling the DUI?
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Bethlehem, PA.
Posts: 1,781
Lizatola, it sounds like he's overreacting. A DUI is not the end of the world, the only thing you can do is talk to a lawyer. You can do a google search for your state and find out what the range of fines and all that are. Usually for a first offense it's not that bad. Don't know what you meant by extreme DUI though, was there an accident involved?
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
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It depends on where you live. Some states are more strict than others. I live in Texas and my DUI was something like this...
Loss of License for 6 months (I was able to get an occupational license)
DUI classes, victim impact class
12 month probation, monthly visits to PO, payments each month
Community Service for however many hours the court decides
Fines and Court costs
Attorneys fees
After all is said and done, it cost me about $8,000
I've only had the one DUI, but from what I understand, everything doubles if you get a second and a third usually involves jail time.
Loss of License for 6 months (I was able to get an occupational license)
DUI classes, victim impact class
12 month probation, monthly visits to PO, payments each month
Community Service for however many hours the court decides
Fines and Court costs
Attorneys fees
After all is said and done, it cost me about $8,000
I've only had the one DUI, but from what I understand, everything doubles if you get a second and a third usually involves jail time.
Gratefully Sober
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: va
Posts: 56
Extreme DUI generally means that the persons BAC was extremely high. in other words they were completely hammered.the penalties are higher in that case than they would be for someone with a BAC of .08 or.10
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: East Coast of Virginia
Posts: 60
Never had a DUI...Thank God. I do know that it's not the end of the world. I think he needs to hear that. This very well could have saved his or someone else's life. Yes, he will have to pay for his mistake, that's for sure. This does not mean that his life will not get better. There's only one was for this to happen and that's to stop completely. Seeing how this is his first offence, the judge should go easy on him. Yes...it will probably cost a few thousand to get past it (I heard around 10 thousand in VA where I live). If you ask me, it's a small price to pay for a lesson (hopefully) learned. If he had hurt or killed someone it would have been A WHOLE LOT WORSE. He has that to be thankful for. I hope he doesn't lose his job in this economy. Best of luck to the both of you.
Scott
Scott
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Join Date: Oct 2011
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If he doesn't stay sober he's more than likely getting more of these and the results are geometrically worse each time. By the 4th you'll be tempted to encourage him to carry out his plans, if you're still around. I've met alcoholics with over 20 dui arrests. And plenty who have killed others after deciding to have just a few to ease off the stress of problems they've caused themselves by drinking. There is nothing that is out of the realm of possibility when an alcoholic has a few.
My ex would set aside money each month to accrue for these as they came around, pretty smart of her. If he promises to always and forever just drink at home or take a cab, it would be silly for you to believe that will be so.
I got sober after my 4th, and haven't been arrested since for anything. But for as long as I drank, these and plenty of other things you don't need to know about were just part of the drinking landscape.
My ex would set aside money each month to accrue for these as they came around, pretty smart of her. If he promises to always and forever just drink at home or take a cab, it would be silly for you to believe that will be so.
I got sober after my 4th, and haven't been arrested since for anything. But for as long as I drank, these and plenty of other things you don't need to know about were just part of the drinking landscape.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,913
P.S. - I didn't have to get a breathalyzer apparatus installed on my car, but I hear that is quite common now. My DUI was about 5 years ago, and they were just starting to require those. That is an additional possibility and with those, in addition to the cost of the unit itself, you have to go in every so often (once a month?) and have them read and re-calibrated, which costs money, but I don't know how much.
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Join Date: Aug 2010
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Extreme DUI in Arizona. He got caught running a red light and straddling the middle white line(failure to stay in his lane). According to the breathalyzer his BAC was .17(over 2 times the legal limit). They also took blood. He was taken to a DUI task force trailer where he was processed and then sent home in a cab. They took his license, I believe the suspension is for 90 days. Even though it's his first offense, there is the possibility of 30 days in jail. Luckily, we have some money put away and probably can afford the costs, it's the possible impact on his job that worries him the most. I think the shame, humiliation, anger, and depression are what's getting to him the most right now. He's always been prone to overreacting, too. He was a dry drunk for 15 years and started drinking about 18 months ago and has slowly been slipping down the slope. He said he thinks he was subconsciously looking for a reason to quit. I guess he got it.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 1,635
It is definitely not the end of the world. He can use it as a wake up call though.
Does he drive for a living? It did not impact my job, but keeping on drinking did.
Definitely look up the minimum punishments for a first DUI in your state. I would ask the lawyer what he or she can specifically get decreased. For me personally, a lawyer was a waste of five thousand dollars. It is what it is, I was guilty and I had to do a set list of things like DUI school, community service, etc. No lawyer is going to prevent you from having to do those things.
Oh, and start doing all the requirements NOW. Like AA. Get a sheet signed, go to DUI school, start community service. The judge will most likely look favorably upon him for doing it early and that is what a lawyer would tell you to do also.
Hopefully he will not let this crisis drive him to the bottle.
I am not a lawyers, so please don't take this as legal advice. I am just sharing my experience and I would love to have that 5K I spent now.
Does he drive for a living? It did not impact my job, but keeping on drinking did.
Definitely look up the minimum punishments for a first DUI in your state. I would ask the lawyer what he or she can specifically get decreased. For me personally, a lawyer was a waste of five thousand dollars. It is what it is, I was guilty and I had to do a set list of things like DUI school, community service, etc. No lawyer is going to prevent you from having to do those things.
Oh, and start doing all the requirements NOW. Like AA. Get a sheet signed, go to DUI school, start community service. The judge will most likely look favorably upon him for doing it early and that is what a lawyer would tell you to do also.
Hopefully he will not let this crisis drive him to the bottle.
I am not a lawyers, so please don't take this as legal advice. I am just sharing my experience and I would love to have that 5K I spent now.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,913
Oh yeah, I remember the extreme humiliation and depression that I felt. I had to spend the night in jail and call a friend to come bail me out the next day. One would think that going through all that would have made me realize that I shouldn't drink, but, nope. I continued to drink for about 2 more years before I finally decided to do something about it.
Gone In
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 223
Originally Posted by Elisabeth888 
...Oh, and start doing all the requirements NOW. Like AA. Get a sheet signed, go to DUI school, start community service. The judge will most likely look favorably upon him for doing it early and that is what a lawyer would tell you to do also...
High on Life
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Been to Hell and Back
Posts: 1,157
Yeah that sounds a lot like me. What's he doing for his sobriety? He should concentrate on that. Like people told me when I was going through this, what's going to happen is going to happen. The only thing he can control is his sobriety, and it's much better to be sober when you have to go to court and meet with lawyers and things.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
It depends upon where you live. I've had 3.......and I blew over what they consider to be "super DUI" now on all 3 but there wasn't a "super DUI" when I got popped like there is now.
In Michigan, .01 can get you an "impaired" ticket....which is a lessor ticket but still counts as an alcohol driving offense just like a regular dui does. There's really not much difference in the court's eyes between impaired and a DUI - not when it comes to sentencing anyway. Most cops won't nail someone for anything less than .08 though. At .08 you're in DUI land.....though the first one usually gets plead down to an "impaired" charge. My first one I blew a .22, plead to impaired and got my punishment. (which, as I said, is the same at .01 as it is at .08 and above).
Without going overboard with info, you asked about super-DUI's and I can tell you what it's like in Michigan (your state may be different). In Mich, if you get alcohol/drug related driving offenses in YOUR LIFETIME (and "impaired" counts).......and then you get a 3rd...... that third offense can be charged as a felony and can carry up to a 5 year prison sentence (not county jail here......we're talking the real deal). Most judges hit ppl with 11 months and put them in county lock-up (though they COULD go for the full 5yrs and hit you with a state penitentiary).
For the SUPER DUI......anyone blowing 2x the legal limit for a DUI or higher (.08 is dui limit.....so we're talking anyone blowing .16 or higher) CAN get up to 180 days in jail, a $700.00 fine, + 1yr of required alcohol/substance abuse treatment, as well as a driver’s license suspension for a year. Here in Michigan....it depends upon the judge, the prosecutor, and the particulars of the case as to whether they pursue that or not. It's luck of the draw. Over the past year or two that it's been in existence here, MOST ppl get the the full-bore hit.
As for the other stuff he talked about.......I'll disagree with it being an "over-reaction." I DO NOT think it's an overreaction. I can tell you I was very suicidal when I got nailed for my second DUI. I would have told you it was the fear of the DUI penalties that had me suicidal. I can see now, looking back with the clarity of hindsight, that untreated alcoholism was kicking my a$$ thought I didn't know that's what it was. Suicide is big on the list of things that kills alcoholics of my type. The pain and the futility of living life the way I had been living it was more than I could take, drinking was making it worse, and I didn't think I could keep going any longer.....and I didn't think I'd quit drinking and have anything close to a happy life. Obviously, I didn't go through with it.....but it's very serious and if he's talking about it, odds are good he's thought about it a whole lot more.
As expensive, painful and nasty as the punishments were for my 2nd and 3rd DUI were (total cost was in the $30k+ range between the two of them, no license for the past 6.5 years, +, +, +), it was the best thing that ever could have happened to me. I was FORCED to look at my drinking.......forced to look at alcoholism......and forced to attend AA meetings. What was the "worst thing ever" really was the beginning of the biggest blessing I've ever been given.....
In Michigan, .01 can get you an "impaired" ticket....which is a lessor ticket but still counts as an alcohol driving offense just like a regular dui does. There's really not much difference in the court's eyes between impaired and a DUI - not when it comes to sentencing anyway. Most cops won't nail someone for anything less than .08 though. At .08 you're in DUI land.....though the first one usually gets plead down to an "impaired" charge. My first one I blew a .22, plead to impaired and got my punishment. (which, as I said, is the same at .01 as it is at .08 and above).
Without going overboard with info, you asked about super-DUI's and I can tell you what it's like in Michigan (your state may be different). In Mich, if you get alcohol/drug related driving offenses in YOUR LIFETIME (and "impaired" counts).......and then you get a 3rd...... that third offense can be charged as a felony and can carry up to a 5 year prison sentence (not county jail here......we're talking the real deal). Most judges hit ppl with 11 months and put them in county lock-up (though they COULD go for the full 5yrs and hit you with a state penitentiary).
For the SUPER DUI......anyone blowing 2x the legal limit for a DUI or higher (.08 is dui limit.....so we're talking anyone blowing .16 or higher) CAN get up to 180 days in jail, a $700.00 fine, + 1yr of required alcohol/substance abuse treatment, as well as a driver’s license suspension for a year. Here in Michigan....it depends upon the judge, the prosecutor, and the particulars of the case as to whether they pursue that or not. It's luck of the draw. Over the past year or two that it's been in existence here, MOST ppl get the the full-bore hit.
As for the other stuff he talked about.......I'll disagree with it being an "over-reaction." I DO NOT think it's an overreaction. I can tell you I was very suicidal when I got nailed for my second DUI. I would have told you it was the fear of the DUI penalties that had me suicidal. I can see now, looking back with the clarity of hindsight, that untreated alcoholism was kicking my a$$ thought I didn't know that's what it was. Suicide is big on the list of things that kills alcoholics of my type. The pain and the futility of living life the way I had been living it was more than I could take, drinking was making it worse, and I didn't think I could keep going any longer.....and I didn't think I'd quit drinking and have anything close to a happy life. Obviously, I didn't go through with it.....but it's very serious and if he's talking about it, odds are good he's thought about it a whole lot more.
As expensive, painful and nasty as the punishments were for my 2nd and 3rd DUI were (total cost was in the $30k+ range between the two of them, no license for the past 6.5 years, +, +, +), it was the best thing that ever could have happened to me. I was FORCED to look at my drinking.......forced to look at alcoholism......and forced to attend AA meetings. What was the "worst thing ever" really was the beginning of the biggest blessing I've ever been given.....
1000 Post Club
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Midwest USA
Posts: 2,284
Liz, he is overreacting. The system could not handle putting everyone who gets their first DUI in prison. Extreme DUI is just a fancy way of saying he was extremely drunk at the time he was driving. I've had 3 DUI's and while my license issue has been hell, I never spent a day in jail.
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 135
In the State of Ohio, a DUI/OVI has several different categories in reference to alcohol content and refusal consequences. If you refuse the test, automatic suspension. If you blow over the legal limit, .08 BAC, automatic suspension. If you blow at or above a .17 BAC, automatic suspension and increased penalties. A Test result of .34 is going to probably receive increased penalties, depending on the state, and will definitely get the attention of the judge due to the extremely high result.
My advise would be to get yourself in some program before your initial court appearance (looks good to the judge). Petition the court for driving privliges for work and your alcohol program. An attorney will help you zero here. No attorney on earth can get a .34 BAC thrown out so I would not waste the money. Throw yourself at the mercy of the court, stop drinking via any way that works for you (court may institute probationary random drug/alcohol testing), and move om with your life. Life is not over in any way. You only hurt yourself and not anyone else, thank God.
You have received a wake up call as many of us have. Use it to your advantage. Good luck!
My advise would be to get yourself in some program before your initial court appearance (looks good to the judge). Petition the court for driving privliges for work and your alcohol program. An attorney will help you zero here. No attorney on earth can get a .34 BAC thrown out so I would not waste the money. Throw yourself at the mercy of the court, stop drinking via any way that works for you (court may institute probationary random drug/alcohol testing), and move om with your life. Life is not over in any way. You only hurt yourself and not anyone else, thank God.
You have received a wake up call as many of us have. Use it to your advantage. Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Richmond,Va.
Posts: 183
In Virginia you would be crucified for such a BAC.It's going to cost 10k dollars I guess plus all the other consequences.You must have been living in hell for 15 years with a dry drunk.Maybe he'll come to AA now and find sobriety?Not always, but it does happen.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 197
Originally Posted by lizatola
Extreme DUI in Arizona. He got caught running a red light and straddling the middle white line(failure to stay in his lane). According to the breathalyzer his BAC was .17(over 2 times the legal limit). They also took blood. He was taken to a DUI task force trailer where he was processed and then sent home in a cab. They took his license, I believe the suspension is for 90 days. Even though it's his first offense, there is the possibility of 30 days in jail. Luckily, we have some money put away and probably can afford the costs, it's the possible impact on his job that worries him the most. I think the shame, humiliation, anger, and depression are what's getting to him the most right now. He's always been prone to overreacting, too. He was a dry drunk for 15 years and started drinking about 18 months ago and has slowly been slipping down the slope. He said he thinks he was subconsciously looking for a reason to quit. I guess he got it.
Arizona DUI - DWI - Extreme DUI - Aggravated DUI
if i can't post a link and it gets edited then search google for extreme dui arizona. That's how i found it. i would read as many links as you have time.
And just from quickly reading that AZ ain't no slouch with DUI's. He needs to walk through every hoop they tell him to. Whether it's pay fines or go to jail for a little bit. it will drag on for what seems like forever. But he will in the near future be able to look back and say that was so stupid and that he is so glad it's over with.
Look forward, get sober now, and man up to what he did. It's the only way he can do it. Just be there for him and tell him he has to go through it whatever it is.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Poconos PA
Posts: 1,544
Arizona sounds a bit harsh but he will live through it. I had two during my stupid years and the second one was two years suspension, 48 hour program and 6 months community service. The jail time he will get in Arizona sucks over what I got but it will be over before he knows it.
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