Faith1984

I'm so sorry for you. At least you can say goodbye.
When my first snake, Ringo, died, he had been sick for a while, but the veterenary hadn't told me how bad it was and kept telling me it would get better. He was a lightweight one (a corn snake), and had stopped eating, so we couldn't give him a lot of antibiotics. I saw he stopped breathing one evening when I came in, touched him and he came back awake. I called the vet for an urgency. They told me to wait for the morning and bring him in, and that he'd be okay that night. The next morning he died before he could go to the vet.
They (the vet and his assistant) told my grandparents they could've guessed this would happened, but they just couldn't tell me because of how panicky I was. I wish I had had a chance to say goodbye.

I didn't want a new snake or other animal back then, I only wanted him, Ringo. I would've felt guilty "replacing" him. I went so at loss, I got all sick and all, really like I lost a human being. I had an empty terrarium there reminding me of him. Then one of these days my grandma kinda dragged me to the reptile shop. I did then choose a snake, she agreed on paying half of it. I wasn't sure at first but then I decided it would be better. I went for an entirely different species as I _really_ didn't want to replace Ringo. I had always been interested in boas, so that's when I bought a baby one. (small subspecies, doesn't grow over 1m50)
I'm still sorry that it had to go that way. At first I felt like I was "cheating" on Ringo. But I had a little baby snake there of only 3 months old, that needed all my care. For that reason, I couldn't let myself go into drinking and pills. "Someone" needed me. In the meantime, he's like 19 months old and he's grown a lot bigger. I still miss Ringo, when I look at his pictures. But I love him, Calypso, too. He's quite a lot bigger and heavier, and a very good eater, so I feel a bit safer now, but still, you never know. I've already grown attached to him and I couldn't miss him anymore.
Snakes don't really know emotions for humans like dogs and cats do, but they do recognize your smell, and appreciate your warmth (although you shouldn't pick them up every day). And of course we humans do know emotions and affection, luckily, because that's why we take the best care of our pets!

dawnrunner

I read your post early this morning and have been thinking about it today.

Can you get some really good photos of your cat and write the life story? I find that creating some artifact about a loved one does help me deal with their loss a little bit.

Telling the story of how this cat and you have synched up your lives could be beneficial and maybe comforting.

Wishing you the best through this wrenching loss.

Hevyn

I'm sorry you are hurting. You and your kitty were so very lucky to have each other all those years. I know you'll see your loved one again.

OceanSize

thank you all so much. i'm very frightened. i don't want to put him to sleep but he's 6.5lbs, in heart failure, and i don't want him to suffer. i know i will have to, probably pretty soon.

i'm waiting for the veterinarian to call me back because i'm so afraid i won't know the signs, so i called to ask what i should look for. he is eating and drinking, but not very much - very lethargic and obviously at 6.5lbs very very very skinny.

this is really hard.

i'm afraid.

i wrote to my boyfriend (who currently isn't speaking to me) to ask for help, because i need it. I am really scared.

least

At times like this, putting him out of his misery might be the best thing you can do for him. He's not living, he's just waiting to die, poor little kitty. I hope you can come to the right decision soon and spare him any more agony. I cried buckets and felt horribly guilty about putting my beagirl to sleep but the vet said it was the kindest thing I could do for her.

suki44883

Many of us have had to do the same thing, hon. Yes, it's hard and it hurts us so, but that's not really what it's about. It's about quality of life for your beloved kitty. I hope you can find it in your heart to do the kindest thing.

honeypie

Ocean, try not to be frightened. Talk with your vet and be strong for your kitty, who at 17 is a very old soul indeed, and may be hanging on because of your fear. Let your cat pass into the next world peacefully, without anxiety or worrying about you.

Try not to be fearful. You can do this without losing your sobriety. You can handle it. Just remember that all is temporary and beautiful. We bring ourselves sadness when we deny Nature her way. If your cat is tired (and he is) he deserves a peaceful rest and he will rest in peace knowing that you will be okay.

Can you let him go with that...can you tell him not to worry and that you will be all right.

I have had to say goodbye to my beloved pets in the past too. Cats and dogs. It is hard and sad. But there is no avoiding it...only making it as dignified and comforting as possible. I have also always kept their remains in lovely wooden boxes with their names on it, and that way they stay with me. There are places that do that.

There are pet bereavement counselors and we are here too.

I hope you find the courage to face your fear and be there for him as you always have.

Hugs and blessings.

OceanSize

i made a decision, and am going to put my little kittie to sleep and bring him peace early this week.

thank you all so much for all the replies.

with love....
OS

Freedom1990

I understand the difficulty of that decision, hon.

Impurrfect

(((Ocean))) - I, too, understand how hard that decision is. I know it's the right and loving thing to do when the time comes, but it still hurts

Mega hugs and prayers,

Amy

Aegian

Ocean, that is one of (if not THE) most horrific decision any animal partner has to come to in this life. You are doing the right thing in letting him go and not having for him to put up with any more pain.

Remember the Rainbow Bridge.

(((hug)))

bonami

I am so sorry, OceanSize. I have not yet been in your place (my cat is almost 2 so she's still a baby!) but I have many friends who have, and I can only imagine how difficult it is. I hope it helps you to think about how he will soon be at peace and out of pain, and waiting for you at Rainbow Bridge. ((((hugs))))