Peter

Well if it is that easy to "absorb emotions" then it should be a cinch being happy all the time.

All I have to do is find a room full of "Happy AA" people and suck up the bliss.

Brandeeno

I appreciate all of the responses and the common answer seems to be "Try different classes".

The town I live in is small and the only current center I know of isn't in the nicest part of town.

I will check into different classes and look for other other locations that I might be able to attend.

For now I will continue to self medicate by going to the gym twice a day or whenver I get the urge.

Thanks again for the suggestions.

BackToSquareOne

I don't know, I seem to find the negative aspects and stories of alcoholism to be a very important part of recovery. I need to keep fresh in my mind just how devastating this disease can be.

doorknob

Do you have a meeting schedule? It does look like there are a lot of meetings in one location (a shopping mall). Are they held at a treatment center? Anyway, not saying you should go to AA.. I can only take it in small doses myself, left a meeting early today... but here's the schedule online if you haven't found it already:

http://www.aaneok.org/mtg_list.asp?C...lesville&Day=8

DK

jh1

Im there!

bugsworth

Brandeeno, while it seems you may be alone with your opinion of aa meetings you are not. I too have found many (not all) meetings to be extremely depressing and have left a few feeling absolutely horrible. I clearly remember one such meeting where the focus seemed to be that we are sick for life. The speaker, sober 16 years, went on and on about how sick he was...every deed and thought ruled by his "disease" I wanted to run, instead I walked away at 10 months sober. Check out other meetings if you can...make an educated decision based on your ability to stay sober and your mental health. I knew for me aa was not a viable option.

Best of luck and keep posting.

NoelleR

I'm doing this in 'PM' instead of the 'Uncomfortble at AA" thread because I didn't want to turn the thread into a 'quality over quantity' thread. I'm one of those who believe that one cannot aquire much 'quality' without, at least, some 'quantity.' Besides, I've usually found that those folks who seem to be the loudest and vociferous when shouting (usually) that....."It's 'quality' NOT 'quantity' that counts..." ...well, often times, they can't seem to accumulate much in the way of continuous time atall - with or without it being 'quality.' ..... LOLOL

But I did want to address this one thing that you said....:

"...I clearly remember one such meeting where the focus seemed to be that we are sick for life. The speaker, sober 16 years, went on and on about how sick he was...every deed and thought ruled by his 'disease'..."

Yes, I've known many (well, too many anyway) folks just like this, and they're unfortunately great 'canon fodder' for those 'quality NOT quantity' folks. Unfortunately there are way too many folks like this in recovery (in AA, and other places), and to me they're not the kind of 'recovered' I want to be. I went and started in AA to gain recovery, to get my life back, not to keep my life under alcohol's control, and for me to always consider myself 'sick' and still being ruled by my disease....well, that's NOT what I want for my life, in recovery; I WAS sick, and alcohol did rule my life, but NOT NO MORE.....!

I'm sorry this was something that kept you out of the rooms of AA; I've found these rooms to be great places to find sober friends so as not to be alone and lonely --- now I've found that to be alone doesn't necessarily mean lonely.....woooooohoooooo ....and I way prefer my own company to the company of others.....

Dee74

Hi Brandeeno

I've never been to AA, but I've read other posters detail what you describe before.

From my time here at SR I don't think its unreasonable to suggest that AA's not a universal solution for everyone.

If, despite your best efforts, AA and meetings are not working for you, you have not only the right, but also the responsibility to check out other things...don't let anything stand in the way of you beating your addiction.

good luck in whatever you find that works

D

Pinkcuda

That's not what AA is! We are there to solve our common problem, not theirs


This is one of the things that goes away as the miracle of the program comes out in us. Resentments stem from other people not doing things or saying things that we feel they should. That's their thing and I'm not in this for their well being. I'm in it for mine. Leave their inventory to them.

CantWait11

yah like it has been said, the meetings are wayyy different from eachother. I know what you mean, even at this current meeting im going to I feel like its a pretty burnt out group, that live off coffee and cigarettes, but its support, and they care, and its way better than the last meetingplace i went to

the place i use to go to i only went to because i was on a court card for a dui, i wasnt a problem drinker at the time, just got popped the 1 time i drove - for speeding and blew a .08
anyway that place was loveless, dismal, and dry even tho it was in a comfy building on a nice street.

this new place im at now, 2 yrs later (because now i am a problem drinker) I went to because it was closer. I would have gone sooner had i known it wasnt anything like the last place. even tho its in a cold concrete building with hospital colored walls in a peculiar neighborhood, the PEOPLE make all the difference. I was approached on my 1st day as soon as i walked in. 3 ppl introduced themselves to me, it actually overwhelmed me. I guess i shouldnt have judged the book by its cover because I thought the place looked dismal.

anyway I hope you find a good AA meeting and like I said, i know how you feel. Find at least one person you can cling to, and get closer with the book.

goodluck,
bj

yeahgr8

I've known people that have gone to AA, worked the steps and changed their lives. I also know, which sounds more relevant to this thread, people that go to AA not as frequently but when they feel they need support and also to remind themselves why they became sober in the first place. The best example i have was a meeting, one of the few, i attended years ago and a chap shared and said he had been sober for 10 years, not been to AA for 7 of them and had only come to a meeting because the previous Friday he had been invited out for staff drinks and had, for a second, thought he might quite like a beer.

The point is, and has been said already, that it is a resource for you to use, if you can stay sober without it and do not end up living as a 'dry drunk' then great!

And there are going to be assholes in AA, there are everywhere. i went to a meeting years ago when i was younger, had been sober 2 days and asked one of the guys if i could buy a big book and he asked how long i had been sober, i told him, and in a very off belittleng way said that i should have at least 2 months sober before i could possibly begin to understand the big book and to buy one then with no mention of keep coming to meetings, just a brush off. As i was a young man with no self esteem at the time that was it for me. There is no lesson there other than the guy was a *****!

I have been sober 9 weeks (from drinking everyday, 37 yrs old) and i will be going to AA in january and will keep an open mind, if i go to a meeting and i dont like it for whatever reason i will find another, if it really isn't for me then i will use it to remind myself why i am sober and for when i feel i need it!

And if i overhear a young man talking to a member who then dismisses him without regard, i will put the young man right and drag the vet out and kick the living **** out of him...and then find another meeting;-)

keep an open mind man:-)

navysteve

AA does not consider alcohol the problem either. It is merely a symptom of a bigger problem

MagicMan08

I agree with the fact that the meeting may have strayed from the overall “Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like, what happened, and what we are like now”

However, I went to this NA meeting a while back and there was like 50 people there and then it separated into two or three rooms, and one was like the "candlelight" room and I think that was kind of the place people went if they needed to share or vent a bit and get support for staying sober....so you could avoid this if you wanted. I learned this after listening to a poor ladies story about the mess her life was with people and cry for about 15 minutes....I felt bad for her, but it was a bit awkward at first...I thanked her for being sober today, and reminded her to keep coming back

Music

I remember sounding somewhat like you, and I'll tell you what was told to me. Stop worrying about other people and what they do or don't do and put the focus where it should be.....on you. Go to meetings until you learn to like them and if you feel uncomfortable, it's probably because sometimes, the truth is uncomfortable to listen to.