NOMOMERLOTMAMMA

Teeth,

I'm glad that you checked back in. Sounds like alcohol has Its grip on you tight. Please reach out to a recovery program..call those guys who visited you in the hospital..give it a shot. If not for yourself just yet..how bout for your poor family who probably don't want to go through watching you almost die again.

I'm praying that you find the willingness to surrender.

Dee74

Teeth - it's not over til you stop breathing.
and no-one in their right mind wants to stop breathing....

There are options out there. Lots of options - not only AA if that's not your bag - look at them, use them.

I hope to see you posting here for a long time to come too
D

22NGONE

Teeth,

Don't let your disbelief in God stop you from going to AA...it's God or your higher power, it can be the sun, karma, your definition of a life force, whatever u want or can believe in. Hell I know one guy who's higher power was and is his first 24 hour coin. He's still playing with his ultimate idea of a higher power but for now, as he says, the coin works.

John

chip

Welcome to the forum, teethoflions
I am deeply saddened by your posts. I hope you can find the willingness to quit. Alcohol will kill. Please get some medical attention before it kills you. Please consider some sort of recovery program. AA is free, and it helps millions of people every year, including atheists. Above all, know that you are not alone. There are many of us who are praying for you.

Check in and let us know how you're doing, k?
chip

problemchild

Hey , i can relate to the amount and the helpless ness you feel. I also drank large quanities like you , felt i was the worst drunk on earth, and a athesist, felt like i believed enuff in god if he was real but enuff to say i did not... AA as i understand it now is not religous but spirutiual, and i have a spirit greater than me that controls my life and my thoughts,(most of the time)HHHHHHHHEEEEEE..
My friend you are not hopeless or lost if i can quit and become the SOBER HAPPY person i am today ,, you can be also..................

Take Care,
John

Tazman53

Teeth do not throw in the towel, have you checked out AA since you got out of the hospital?

Look if AA is not for you there are other recovery programs out there, try them, just keep in mind that they all take work on your part, there is no magical program or pill, if you want to stay stopped you will need to work at it.

I can tell you how the AA guys knew you were there, you were in the alcoholic ward!!!

I can tell you that I drank like you do, I went through detox and knew that I could not stay sober ALONE!!!!! I needed help staying sober, I use AA to stay sober for several reasons, one is it is free, I can go when I want to or not go. I need face to face support, for some folks online is fine.

Try a recovery program of some sort, doing this alone is damn tough, I could not do it alone.

gerryP

Because I came into the program already having a God and that God is loving and caring and non judgmental, I didn't have to spend time on what I would consider the tedious task of trying to find a HP.

Here is my question and I will be blunt. How does the sun remove character defects? How does one pray only for the sun's knowledge (or door knob, or tree) of it's will and the power to carry that out?

In my opinion? If having a HP is a problem, then drop it and get on with the business of finding a way to get sober and stay sober. That may involve going to an addiction Dr. and therapist and join a support group for alcoholics that doesn't involve having to believe in anything outside of yourself.

Ananda

I do not believe in an all powerful, all knowing all loving etc. etc. god.....but i have a higher power and it does remove character defects and it works with all the steps and I am sober.

That said, there are other support groups for recovery from this disease and Dr.s and Adictionologists can all help you on this path. SR can also be of great help to the recovering alchoholic or the alchoholic who still suffers.

I sure hope you are still here and reading!

gerryP

Fair enough Ananda. Just saying there are other options if a HP is something that proves to be an obstacle to getting sober.

Dee74

I can't see the problem in 'a power greater than ourselves'. It can be a bucket of KFC for all I care Gerry. Arent you imposing your own conception there (and a generous dollop of judgement)?

That goes against my reading of Higher Power 'as we understand it'.....

Although I haven't 'done AA' I did study the steps - for me, the power greater than myself was the support and help of the good people here at SR and, in turn, the help and service I gave back, and continue to.

It worked for me - every bit as intangible as the sun, a tree, a doorknob...or 'God'.
- and just as life changingly powerful

D

gerryP

Hi Dee,

The way I see it...not meaning I am correct, is that there are those like myself, that believe in the big guy in the sky, which is really who the B.B. is referring to ("Him"), yet the B.B also says " ...of your understanding. In other words believe in whatever if it gets you sober.

The problem though is that many people in the rooms equate spirituality (the sun, the moon or a bucket of KFC) as "religion" and run anyway or refuse to even to try a meeting.

I agree with you ~ whatever can get and keep you sober, but that doesn't work for everyone and pushing the need to believe in something, anything, if it can't be the big guy in the sky, can keep anyone wanting to get sober, through AA or even considering it.

Dee74

OK. I see you point more clearly now Sorry for any confusion. My bad.

I guess the point to make to teethoflions then is - I know many committed (and successful) AA members right here on SR who are atheists, agnostics, buddhists, catholics, mormons...

the 'God' thing need not be a deal breaker, as far as I understand it
D

gerryP

Not at all Dee and I wish the God thing wasn't an impediment to many people in trying AA. there is a lot to be said for support and SR proves that.

i too hope that we hear from teeth. If you're out there teeth, we're thinking of you and there are lots of other options out there if you want to get sober.

Tazman53

The quote below from the book Alcoholics Anonymous was all it took for one of my agnostic sponsee's to get past the "God thing". He told me that he has always known that a power of some sort was possible, this was his beginning. I heard an aethiest speaker who had quite a few years of sobriety speak of how he dealt with the "God thing", I wish I had a transcript of his talk, it is something I would love to share with all, but I would rather not paraphrase what he said because it has been quite some time since I heard him speak, but he was a great guy and had a great program.

Texasblind

You know, when I finally had a few weeks behind me, I began to realize the only thing I hadn't tried was a HP.

I wouldn't describe myself as an athiest, but it's funny how that worked out. As soon as I gave my life over to someone, something (anything), it started clicking.

carlwinslo

i just read your post about 45 plus a day and its like it came from my own mouth literally.I'm at about 40 natural lights a day right now, and have all the same symptoms. i started drinking more than usual when i was diagnosed with panic disorder around 5 years ago, but it was never as bad as it is now. i have been doing this for maybe a month or so. before then it was a twelve pack a night for awhile then progressed to an 18 back then bam now i buy two cases just to make sure when i wake up with the shakes i have the cure in my fridge.
I can barely go to the store to buy the **** due to my agoraphobia due to the anxiety. Also the sleep thing kills me the most i can stay awake for the whole day drinking all day and then when i pass out i wake up 2 to 4 hours later with the shakes and have to pop a xanax and drink around 6 beers before i feel normal again. i hope you read this and let me know if you got help or how you are doing. not to sound gay but its like we have some kind of bond.

hughs dad

Yeah I agree with all of the above posts. Go see a Dr. or rish death. Dude, your throwing your life away (as did I before getting sober) for a substance. I know you may have problems, but you truley aren't unique. Alchohol is not making any of them better. Please go see a dr. give AA a chance. Not sure what there is to "not agree" with regarding the 12 steps. So what you're an atheist. All it asks is to be open to believing in a power greater than yourself.

I wish you the best of luck, but like someone said, "nothing changes if nothing changes". If you don't seek help you'll continue to do the things you've been doing. Chose to fight..

Dee74

Carl

I think it's very important you see a Doctor before trying to quit. I'd also recommend AA to you.

D

Taking5

Carl,

The OP's post is nearly 2 years old, in case you missed it. I also agree with Dee, going cold turkey off of that volume of alcohol can be deadly. Please go see a Dr.

hughs dad

Teeth, for someone who drinks up to 60 beers a day, your writting skills are great. No mispelled words, correct punctuation, etc... I hope we're not being taken on a ride here by you... Assuming we're not, do yourself a favor and go to an AA meeting. What can it hurt. Hell, plan on driking after it's over. Just go to one. I promise you (if this is real) you won't have a bad exp.