tw33k

I wake in the morning at whatever time..take my medication (225mg venlafaxine, 2mg xanax twice a day, 20 mg olazapine and 32mg suboxone). Once the suboxone's dissolved, I grab a drink. It's insane!!
I know better!! This is only been a recent problem but I can't let it continue, or worsen.
I know the reasons why I drink. I've been transient for so long, without stable accomodation and am panicking. I'm trying to organise things so I can fly inter state and move in with my girlfriend.
Once I'm up there and settled, I can't see myself drinking any where near as much as I am now.

problemchild

If you really want to stop drinking , you know whwt you need to do, if not just ask..
You really have to want it or you will fail, you have to put your heart and SOUL into it or you just waste everybodys time, the true reality of it, not trying to be mean but just honest.. I have learned alot these past days and i know if you you dont want it , dont waste your time or anyone elses... Drink to you are full and truly sick of it..

Take care , John

problemchild

Sorry for the harsh post but the truth is the the truth, I have been to 5 rehabs and just now got it , wasn't from rehab but a post on here. Please stop before you end up like me in my 40's and hating life, stop the madness now.......
Take care , John

Anna

Hi twk,

It's always dangerous to mix drugs with alcohol because you never know what can happen. I had to learn healthy ways to deal with stress and you can do that too. I don't think you should depend on being with your girlfriend to help you stop drinking. Of course, it's great to have support from loved ones and it helps a lot, but you need to do this for yourself.

nandm

I never had trouble finding a reason to drink...
a sunny day
a rainy day
a cloudy day
I was in a good mood
I was in a bad mood
I was angry
Hangover
no hangover
lots of friends
no friends
bored
a holiday
a barbeque
dinner time
a good movie
football season
hockey season
basketball season
baseball season
I would probably have drank over golf if I could get past how totally boring I find it....lol
the list could go on and on. I drank because that is what my life centered on.
I did not know how to do anything without drinking. I did not know I could do anything without drinking.

I only was able to stop when I realized that I could no longer go on living in the insanity of alcoholism. I was at the place where I could not live drinking but did not know how to live without drinking. I am alive today because I threw myself wholeheartedly into a program of recovery. I was willing to go to any lengths to find sobriety; job or no job, relationship or no relationship, friends or no friends, money or no money, I had finally realized that the outside stuff was not going to get me sober any more than it had the power to make me drunk. It was just life ****. What was going to make a difference was the inside of me and that was what had to change.

I do agree with problem child; a person needs to come to a place where they decide one way or the other; am I going to continue with the insanity or throw myself into the solution. Half way doesn't work for anything except to guarantee failure. I hope you find the place where you are ready to jump into recovery with both feet. I have no regrets for my leap of faith. I have not fallen yet. I truely believe my signature line below as it is proven to me every day in my life.

problemchild

let me make myself clear, it was a post that i read here that opened my eyes to the way i was. life is a bitch but the drinking makes it worse, plus you got the hangovers..And nothing is cured by the drinking, Just delayed , and seems worse,,,,,,,,, at least this is my experience, i had to drink to get over the hangovers WTF that is no way to cure yourself, I care for you and wish you would quit now............ Please stop ..
Take care , John

tw33k

Thank you all for your help. I was 7 years clean, up to the end of 2005, when i got seperated from my partner of 10 years. I've been on suboxone for my heroin habit, for 9 months now.
Because my lfe is so unstable at the moment (ie:no job, no home...i'm crashing at a friend's place who is an alcoholic herself). If I had some stabilility in my life, I would not drink daily.
And the worst part is, drunk people reallly annoy me. I came home just now and my friend is drunk on wine. Took her half an hour to admit she was even drunk when a blind man could see it.
My life at the moment is a mess. I need to organise myself, change my meds so i can get them interstate and get the hell outta here. This place is nothing but one bad bad memory after another.
Once I achieve some stability and some relaxation time, I'm sure this drinkng pattern will stop.

CarolD

Are you attending NA or AA ?

Those support groups are very helpful
and I know I would not have quit drinking without AA.

Blessings

Tazman53

tw33k for this alcoholic geographical cures never worked, I moved from Va. to Denver, still drank, moved from Denver to Sacramento, drank even more, moved from Sacramento back to Va., drank even more!!! Moved 4 times, divorced & remarried and still drank!!!!

Changing where I lived or who I was with did not help me when it came to drinking, you see I am an alcoholic, as a result it is either drink until I die or get sober!!!!

When I finally got sick and tired enough of being sick and tired, I stopped drinking.

I was just like you, I could not stop drinking no matter what!!!! As long as I beleived there was a way that I could drink normally I continued to drink alcoholicly!

Once I became HONEST with myself and admitted I am powerless over alcohol, then, and only then was I able to start to seek a solution knowing that the only solution was total abstinance!!!

If I have one drink before I am finished I am thinking about the next and continue to do so until:

I pass out
I run out of booze & money
I fall asleep

Take this test and you decide whether you think you can drink normally? Alcoholics Anonymous :

If you are an alcoholic I can tell you from first hand experience that as long as an alcoholic drinks they are going to get worse, never better!!!!

An alcoholic can stop drinking for 10 years, if they start again within a week they will be just as bad or maybe worse then they were when they quit.

Did I mention that scientist also know that alcoholism is a progressive disease.

tw33k

Thankyou all for ur input. I attend weekly GROW groups (for ppl with a dual-diagnosis). I also attend weekly at least) NA meetings.
I'm doing a 'geographical' because I know they don't work. I'm simply moving to b with the love of my life, who is aware of all my problems and is committed to help me get back on track.
Like I said, this drinking problem is only recent, maybe the past month or so, but I know it's a problem and i need to stop.
With the help of my girlfriend, my groups, my counsellor, psychiatrist and you guys I WILL overcome this. It's just a hiccup and i'm determined to beat it

lovingseren

I am glad you go to NA meetings, please go more often than once a week.

I went to my program online twice daily for meetings in the beginning, it was the best thing I ever did for myself.

Helping yourself is key, taking what is offered, listening to those with "long term" recovery helped me so much, invest in yourself and your recovery, with all your heart and soul.

Good luck to you

Seren

Nicky200

Hi--

51Anna is right, mixing drinks and meds could be fatal. In my mind getting up and having a drink is advanced behavior - it took me a long time to get there, but when I got there what a mess!!!!

I drank for like 10 years, a total alcoholic with all the fun that goes along with that, have done meetings for a long time, etc. The only thing that got me sober is an ebook called how i stopped drinking by max fisher. That is the only thing that could ge me sober. I only mention it when it looks like someone is really hurting and has had enough. I've been sober for around 9 months now, and I was a hard case straight whiskey drinker. I never thought I'd be able to stop, ever!

Hang in there - things will get better!

tw33k

Thanx Nicky and everyone for ur support.
I've cut down damaticallly. I only had a couple yesterday and felt great!! Haven't had a drink today. Just took my meds, had coffee, breakfast etc.
Thankyou all soooo much

Tqconq

Yeah, I started noticing in the bare 3 days I managed ( so far ) my appetite was huge, I craved fruit, vegetables, and ( the oddest ) Steak, I could just not get enough steak lol.

yummy, I think I could give up just so I could have my steak

FightingIrish

:chatter

I spent about 5 years assuring myself that I would be able to stop...when certain things happened, when certain problems resolved themselves, when certain conditions were met...

The problem was there were always more things, problems and conditions that emerged to replace the ones on which I'd based my earlier promises.

The turning point came for me when I admitted I was powerless over alcohol and asked another person for help. I didn't have the whole God thing figured out (still don't), but I knew I couldn't do it by myself, not with all the promises and willpower in the world.

Today (four 1/2 months later) the obsession to drink has been lifted from me. (It has been replaced by other obsessions and a keen awareness of character defects, but today I am certain to remind myself every day that there is nothing in the world that a drink would make better.)

"Turning it over" has also been helpful for me. When I first started coming to meetings, that phrase sounded like something I did with my fork to a piece of over-cooked steak. Today that phrase has daily significance in my life and is part of the medicine that I must practice in order to keep the "ism" at bay.

Boy I'm on a roll with the cliches tonight, but I am convinced that alcohol was simply the symptom of a much larger malady concerning my thoughts and behaviors. And those are the things I must work on. Not drinking is just the entrance fee.

-M

tw33k

You're absolutely right. I drink out of sheer boredom. But I'm gonna fix that. I'm gonna start keeping myself busy during the day.
I drank hardly anything yesterday and will drink even less today.
I'm a bit depressed todaay, but i'll get over it.
Thanx for all your help, it's been very usefull

tw33k

:chatter

prideufc83

TWC i hope you've recovered! I'm in the same spot you were in right now. I just hope i can stop this!!!!

binger33

problemchild, sometimes what we need is a reality check and a kick in the pants. The only people that will call it harsh are the people that don't want to believe it. Everyone that's gone through what you have will just call it the truth.
Because it is.

Dee74

Welcome prideufc83 - glad you've joined us.
Feel free to start your own thread if you like - looking forward to hearing more from you

D