Jewel

Hi Everyone,

I am a recovering alcoholic, and attend alocoholics anonymous on a regular basis. I am struggling at the moment, and I am asking for some suggestions from you lovely people. My sister is also an alcoholic, and has been in AA the same length of time as me. I have been sober for 2 years 10 months O.D.A.A.T. and my sister has been sober for 2 years and 9 months.

I reached my rock bottom on 7th Dec 2000 and have never looked back. I went to a meeting every night for the first year, and have kept regular meetings up since then. My sister is a dry drunk She is anti AA (finds fault) doesn't really think she is an alcoholic, and wants to drink. She doesn't attend meetings that often and rings me constantly telling me she wants to drink and that she thinks I am not an alcoholic also. In other words she wants me to drink with her.

I am feeling vulnerable at the moment and alone. My sister and I have come a long way together and I am feeling sad.

I also go to the alanon/naranon site because my son is an A, and he is really struggling at the moment.

I need lots of AA at the moment and reminding of my priority.

My life was a mess when I was drinking and I dont want that back. I am still willing to go to any lengths.

What do you think I should do.

Love Jewel

Justme57

Jewel, I am only new, but I think meetings , meetings , meetings !

and strive for 1 day at a time !I dont think there is much point arguing with your sis , at least til she aknoledges she needs help, BUT you must keep yourself safe and strong
My Prayers are with you , hang in there girl
HUGXXXXX
Lee

Music

Hi Jewel,
You wrote:
"My sister and I have come a long way together and I am feeling sad."

I would disagree with that statement. Doesn't sound to me like your sister has come as far as you have. You don't want to drink...she does! One of you made more progress than the other.
If a relative or friend of mine came to me and started trying to punch holes in AA and telling me they wanted to drink again, I(have)would tell them to have fun and give me a call from time to time. That might be hard to say to your sister but you have to protect yourself. She's got you all spun up here. The Big Book talks about people who don't want to quit in "Working with Others." Sounds to me like your sister fits the bill. Our job is to carry the message, not the mess. Dump the load and just don't drink.

phoenix

You may need to put your Anon tools to work with your sister.Detach with love.Make it clear that you are available to talk,if and when she is ready to focus on recovery.But let her know that you are not open to any of her efforts to drag you down.Keep the focus on the wonderful progress you've made

Hugs

phoenix

Jewel

Thanks for your replies.

I've heard it said in AA that when the compulsion to drink comes back, and it will, You will know what to do.

I feel that is where I am at.

Will you tell me what your opinion of this is.

I will get through today. That is all that matters.

Love Jewel

CarolD

At about 4 years sober, I was faced with a situation that was very dangerous to my recovery.

I prayed to God and He removed my obsession. Zap! Gone and never has returned for over 10 years..

Big Book Time...

Please read the last paragraph on page 43.

I also found helpful the God referrence on 25.

Music

I've heard it said in AA that when the compulsion to drink comes back, and it will, You will know what to do.

Hi Jewel,
I experienced that situation with about six months sober. The reference on page 43 is true for me. I tried to get human help and it wasn't available. Nobody's fault...just the way it was. I prayed and told God I was scared and didn't know what to do. After praying, I just did the next thing in front of me. As with Carol, I've never been faced with that dilema since. I agree, we will know what to do but first, we have to not want to drink enough to do what we should do. If I had wanted to drink, I wouldn't have sought out human help nor would I have prayed. Maybe the lack of human help was what I needed to have happen so I would decide to give God a chance.
In the beginning I didn't believe God cared enough for me to help me. The fact that I'd been lead to AA didn't cross my mind. So, the praying did the trick. I rmember that experience exactly to this day. That's the day I knew God cared.

Jewel

Thankyou all for your replies. I need the AA blanket around me at this time. And yes I need God too. Thankyou for reminding me.

Love Jewel.