Class of February 2017 Support Thread Part 6
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 611
Axe and Vipe, it sounds like you guys are starting to feel the momentum. Everyone makes a point to remember the bad moments, but these positive moments are just as important to make note of. 
Canguy, that quake sounds nuts. Oddly enough, where I live has a fair number of little quakes, being that there are mountains, ancient fault lines, etc. Never anything of that magnitude though!
Canguy, that quake sounds nuts. Oddly enough, where I live has a fair number of little quakes, being that there are mountains, ancient fault lines, etc. Never anything of that magnitude though!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
Magical night number 6. No urges whatsoever.
I was happy to have such a good appetite and happy stomach today. The sushi dude at the big iconic fish market in our town hooked me up today for lunch. It was a rare day (more rare for a Friday) with only 2 (not 20) in line. I told him "I have $20 and I trust you." He overdelivered majorly. I got one roll - whatever he felt like making - and 7 pairs of nigiri. I wish I could share the picture. Fresh from the fish market, Omakase abundance. Could have easily cost $50+ at a mediocre sushi place. Wow. Stayed and chatted with him for about 25 minutes about his house and remodeling projects. So cool.
I was happy to have such a good appetite and happy stomach today. The sushi dude at the big iconic fish market in our town hooked me up today for lunch. It was a rare day (more rare for a Friday) with only 2 (not 20) in line. I told him "I have $20 and I trust you." He overdelivered majorly. I got one roll - whatever he felt like making - and 7 pairs of nigiri. I wish I could share the picture. Fresh from the fish market, Omakase abundance. Could have easily cost $50+ at a mediocre sushi place. Wow. Stayed and chatted with him for about 25 minutes about his house and remodeling projects. So cool.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 252
Sober Day # 183 after being dependent on wine, daily, for years.
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I’ve reached half a year now without a drop! This seems like a miracle!
Thank you so much everyone for your help.
Axe and Vipe, keep putting one foot in front of another and in no time you will be here too.
We can all do this together.
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I’ve reached half a year now without a drop! This seems like a miracle!
Thank you so much everyone for your help.
Axe and Vipe, keep putting one foot in front of another and in no time you will be here too.
We can all do this together.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
Way to go D.C.!
I had a drinking nightmare last night. I didn't actually dream about drinking but that I was in a situation where I drank the night before and was hungover when I had to be sharp for work. I was so angry and ashamed. I think I even referenced how I'd been doing so well lately in my dream!
Woke up sober, happy, and increasingly healthy though.
I had a drinking nightmare last night. I didn't actually dream about drinking but that I was in a situation where I drank the night before and was hungover when I had to be sharp for work. I was so angry and ashamed. I think I even referenced how I'd been doing so well lately in my dream!
Woke up sober, happy, and increasingly healthy though.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 252
I have to admit that during the past week I have been having some thoughts about drinking------after not having any such thoughts for awhile.
Nothing that I was not able to resist by substituting ( I drank a glass of soda, ate something, or started another activity, etc. ). Also, knowing that my half year anniversary was coming up motivated me to stay the course.
I think the reason is because I have been angry/anxious/depressed/feeling hopeless about something these past few days. I have even had the thought : "What does it matter?"
It DOES help to recognize that THAT is the AV talking.
As I have told you all before, I quit drinking once before for 5 years, and then started again about 5 1/2 years ago.
That first time that I quit, I don't remember having any thoughts about drinking after the initial cravings during the first few weeks, so I wonder why I am this time. I can only guess that the rewiring in my brain has become that much more extensive now.
I am admitting now that I started drinking again 5 1/2 years ago because a huge trauma had happened to me and I just didn't want to go on with life anymore ---I just wanted to anesthetize myself.
A lot of those problems still exist (although they are not as raw)----which is why I was feeling so bad this past week.
Obviously, I need to find another way to deal with them other than pouring a glass of wine.
I have started going to the gym, but to be honest I am really not that much into it ( I am old and my joints are stiff), but I force myself because I know it is good for me.
I do meditate once in awhile, but I should do it every day.
I know that this is a lifelong journey, and at least now 6 mos sober with a clearer head maybe now I can figure out how to do it.
Nothing that I was not able to resist by substituting ( I drank a glass of soda, ate something, or started another activity, etc. ). Also, knowing that my half year anniversary was coming up motivated me to stay the course.
I think the reason is because I have been angry/anxious/depressed/feeling hopeless about something these past few days. I have even had the thought : "What does it matter?"
It DOES help to recognize that THAT is the AV talking.
As I have told you all before, I quit drinking once before for 5 years, and then started again about 5 1/2 years ago.
That first time that I quit, I don't remember having any thoughts about drinking after the initial cravings during the first few weeks, so I wonder why I am this time. I can only guess that the rewiring in my brain has become that much more extensive now.
I am admitting now that I started drinking again 5 1/2 years ago because a huge trauma had happened to me and I just didn't want to go on with life anymore ---I just wanted to anesthetize myself.
A lot of those problems still exist (although they are not as raw)----which is why I was feeling so bad this past week.
Obviously, I need to find another way to deal with them other than pouring a glass of wine.
I have started going to the gym, but to be honest I am really not that much into it ( I am old and my joints are stiff), but I force myself because I know it is good for me.
I do meditate once in awhile, but I should do it every day.
I know that this is a lifelong journey, and at least now 6 mos sober with a clearer head maybe now I can figure out how to do it.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
I am leaving a little work party, good amount of drinking going on. I had a Diet Pepsi, caffeine free even. I had one or two thoughts about how I could have a drink or two to remember the feeling, but it wouldn't stop there. What's worth remembering anyway?
I'm going to go be real productive instead.
I'm going to go be real productive instead.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
Dau, amazing job!! 
Axe you've got the wind at your back!!
Day 20 here. I'm building time. Still no urges. I'm really getting in tune with my body so I can endeavor to take the Doctor's and Life Coach's orders to get well from this physical illness. If you drink you don't notice what's going on with symptoms, and can't track things or pinpoint what is helping or hurting. I'm able to pinpoint a lot better now. Im paying Naturopaths and a life coach so I'm only cheating myself and wasting cash by drinking.
It's tough because I have to figure this out myself. I have also realized that I need to detox off my Benzo. I'm physically addicted to it, I'd say. Its as simple as tapering it over months. It's going to hurt but what doesn't?
Viper
Axe you've got the wind at your back!!
Day 20 here. I'm building time. Still no urges. I'm really getting in tune with my body so I can endeavor to take the Doctor's and Life Coach's orders to get well from this physical illness. If you drink you don't notice what's going on with symptoms, and can't track things or pinpoint what is helping or hurting. I'm able to pinpoint a lot better now. Im paying Naturopaths and a life coach so I'm only cheating myself and wasting cash by drinking.
It's tough because I have to figure this out myself. I have also realized that I need to detox off my Benzo. I'm physically addicted to it, I'd say. Its as simple as tapering it over months. It's going to hurt but what doesn't?
Viper
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,456
I hope the rehab programme will give you a few more tool Axe - you'll get this
I'm glad you're racking up the days and staying positive Viper
hiya rascalwhiteoak RetiredGuy nexttime and DC
I'm glad you're racking up the days and staying positive Viper
hiya rascalwhiteoak RetiredGuy nexttime and DC
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
I hope they give me that Vivitrol shot. I also found a Saturday AA meeting near me. That's my hardest day to win. My parents have been out of town for a few weeks, and I get them back next weekend. I am going to work hard and take every bit of help I can get. I am done being a drinker.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: NM
Posts: 144
Congrats Dau! I'd be willing to bet you'll forget about these minor AV flair ups in 5 years!! You seem to have excellent awareness and a strong plan to continue on this path. Keep on trucking.
Vipe excellent work keep on the path of that life coach lots of good stuff there.
Axe you continue to to make progress. Continue to learn from set backs and before long there will be no more setbacks. Keep fighting friend.
I hope everyone else had a good weekend.
Camped with 2 buddies over the weekend and had a great time. They drank a lot and I had none. I was a bit cranky when I got home (just needed food and a shower) but wife asked if I drank (she thought I might since it was a "man trip". I said nope I quit for myself and I was still there. She doesn't fully understand that never again means truly never again. And she shouldn't. Why she put up with me having a mistress named alcohol for so many years I'll never know. Hopefully she can put up with me without the mistress too
!!
Have a good week everyone
Vipe excellent work keep on the path of that life coach lots of good stuff there.
Axe you continue to to make progress. Continue to learn from set backs and before long there will be no more setbacks. Keep fighting friend.
I hope everyone else had a good weekend.
Camped with 2 buddies over the weekend and had a great time. They drank a lot and I had none. I was a bit cranky when I got home (just needed food and a shower) but wife asked if I drank (she thought I might since it was a "man trip". I said nope I quit for myself and I was still there. She doesn't fully understand that never again means truly never again. And she shouldn't. Why she put up with me having a mistress named alcohol for so many years I'll never know. Hopefully she can put up with me without the mistress too
!! Have a good week everyone
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
Rehab starts today. 5:45 pm. I need it too. I am in a dark place in my life right now. Big fight with my wife last night and she'll be staying at her dad's all week for the last of the home repair. I'll come home to a dark, still house. My parents are still traveling. The pups are with her. I'm just alone and uncertain of our future.
I have to be sober. No way good outcomes are possible without it. So I am committed.
I have to be sober. No way good outcomes are possible without it. So I am committed.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
Posting from break number 2 at treatment. It's going to take some work. I have 3 nights a week for 3 hours for 3 months and they ask for 3 twelve step meetings per week too.
Well, I signed up for their advice and their approach. I'll do it, even when it is hard or inconvenient. I'm not here because I was succeeding.
Well, I signed up for their advice and their approach. I'll do it, even when it is hard or inconvenient. I'm not here because I was succeeding.
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