judyem

Hi. My mother (who was my very best friend) was an alcoholic. She would get drunk every second night and when I was young I'd count the days on the calendar to see if she would be drunk on my birthday or Christmas, or special dates (of course she always was). I know in my heart if she could have done better she would have.

It is the aftermath that stays with the "perfect daughter." We're not allowed to tell secrets out of the home and everything is to appear perfect.

I live in my mind mostly (although everyone thinks I project a very confident, carefree self). I'm sure a lot of you daughters of alcoholic moms know what I mean.

I was surprised to learn that if we don't ourselves become alcoholics, we become "users" of other things (I spend too much - I eat too much - I used to smoke 3 packs of cigarettes a day). I become obsessed.

Anyway, to anyone out there who understands, I hope you have the strength to claim your life. I find that cliche a bit strange because when something is ingrained (like you're just not good enough - or you feel like no one would really like you because you're not worthy), that's a difficult feeling to overcome.

Brownie

Hi judyem! Welcome - I'm a Mom of a Heroin addict and I've kept it a secret - what a relief to fin SR recently and all the wonderful support. I have one online friend of 40 years that I told and one member of our church so I am getting braver but would rather talk to SR. Certainly understand about "using" - myself I eat when upset so try not to keep "goodies" in the house. Really concentrate on eating well-drinking 10 glasses of water. I've even heard the joggers get a high so consequently jog in all kinds of weather. Sending you a ((HUG)) YOU ARE WORTHY!

sadness123

Hey. Im a daughter of drug addict. My father is an addict. So I know what it is like. I no longer live with him. [Im 13.] I now live with his mother. My family is full of addicts and alchoolics. Outside of home we are to act perfect and like no one is an addict or alchoolic. It gets tireding. And sometimes I get just stressed out or upset or something and just break down and cry. I hate it though cause when I cry,I have to make something up because I cant just say my dad is an addict. My dad says he loves me, I know he does but sometimes he just doesnt act like. He left me and my mom for another girl and my mom went broke, so thats why I live here with my grandma. My grandma doesnt want us to live here but we have no where else to live. My dad has lost his rights, so by law he is no longer my dad. My mom still has her rights but we have visitation but she never shows up so I never get to see her. I like it when my dad is in jail cause it is the only time when I know he is not doing drugs and that I know that he is alive and not dead and not murdered. I live in fear that my dad will get murdered over a drug fight or something like that. Well I have to go to bed. Hope you guys enjoy reading my post and I hope my spelling isnt to bad, sorry about the spelling. thanks. good night.