Approaching a former alcoholic... FATHER of your best friend
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2018
Posts: 46
Approaching a former alcoholic... FATHER of your best friend
Alcoholism hit me late in life (26- present)
My best friend, who is my primary HC Proxy is also a beer alcoholic, but has dialed back majorly... since he got married 2+ years ago
his dad, is in... um... 'remission' of alcoholism he hasnt had alcohol for atleast 20 years.
We absolutely, positively, DO NOT agree politically.... has led to so major arguments via FB, but hes been way cool in person...
his family and mine have been linked since we were kids....his dad is a very logical person, almost to a fault... add in politics... its like arguing with my own father....
This subject, will not be presented on FB.
But, I do, wonder.... now this man mid 60's very approachable, easy to get along with, I firmly, in my heart, believe he wouldnt burn me....
How do I present the question?
I need details... I cant just pop the question...
how do I articulate, to an articulate man, that I want to know the details on his family secret that very few know about...
What made him stop? And how does he NOT drink to this day??
My best friend, who is my primary HC Proxy is also a beer alcoholic, but has dialed back majorly... since he got married 2+ years ago
his dad, is in... um... 'remission' of alcoholism he hasnt had alcohol for atleast 20 years.
We absolutely, positively, DO NOT agree politically.... has led to so major arguments via FB, but hes been way cool in person...
his family and mine have been linked since we were kids....his dad is a very logical person, almost to a fault... add in politics... its like arguing with my own father....
This subject, will not be presented on FB.
But, I do, wonder.... now this man mid 60's very approachable, easy to get along with, I firmly, in my heart, believe he wouldnt burn me....
How do I present the question?
I need details... I cant just pop the question...
how do I articulate, to an articulate man, that I want to know the details on his family secret that very few know about...
What made him stop? And how does he NOT drink to this day??
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Meat,
I would be honest...start off with...I have a drinking problem...any ideas?
My ex drunk buddy and me talk. His eyes light up when I talk about the anxiety associated w recovery.
It is lingering and hellish....mind bending stuff.
But, getting through it has made me strong....getting through it makes me never want to go back.
The reason older folks can't quit is because it takes so much strength to get by without the booze...it is easier to just die drunk.
Crazy...but I believe it.
Thanks.
I would be honest...start off with...I have a drinking problem...any ideas?
My ex drunk buddy and me talk. His eyes light up when I talk about the anxiety associated w recovery.
It is lingering and hellish....mind bending stuff.
But, getting through it has made me strong....getting through it makes me never want to go back.
The reason older folks can't quit is because it takes so much strength to get by without the booze...it is easier to just die drunk.
Crazy...but I believe it.
Thanks.
Redmayne
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Manchester, England, UK.
Posts: 1,543
Just make sure...
Just make sure you aren't putting personalities before principles i.e. the object of the exercise is sobriety, yours! Which has nothing to do with people,places and institutions and everything to do with your state of mind, the main problem for the alcoholic centers in the mind see the book,'Alcoholics Anonymous.
'The only power you have is in the mind, all the rest is external events. Remember this and you WILL gain strength,' - Marcus Aurelius.
'The only power you have is in the mind, all the rest is external events. Remember this and you WILL gain strength,' - Marcus Aurelius.
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