AliciaA

Dear forum members,
A friend hospitalised her husband in a recovery clinic some 10 days ago. The rules say her husband should have no contact with the outside world for the duration of the treatment, no access to the Internet, no phone calls - nothing. Today she received a desperate plea for help from him - he somehow found a way to access the Internet. He is writing it's a real psychological abuse, writing he cannot take it any longer, that they will be trying to convince her to keep him there for another month, but he is just asking her to take him out of there, no matter what - just to take him out of there because otherwise he will end up being not just an alcoholic, which he was before, but a severely depressed alcoholic.
Has anybody been through a similar experience? Would would be the best way to react, to act in this situation? Any advice, suggestion would be welcome. Thank you very much.
Alicia

Anna

The best thing would be to contact the clinic.

Boleo

I spent 5 months in rehab. The rules were pretty strict the first 30 days. No visitors, internet, no cell phone use. We could write letters and go to church if we wanted though.

The stories that you hear from him may be gross exaggerations. Remember, a alcoholic resents anything that stands in the way of his/her next drink. I would not worry about it doing him more harm than good unless he does not get used to it within 2 weeks.

totfit

I have seen a lot of folks that have been in rehab come up with all kinds of reasons to get out. Much of what a person hears are things they may not be willing in any way to accept. One has to build strong mental defences "denial" to continue ones drinking beyond reason. I am not saying that there may not be something "fishy" going on, but the most likely scenario is that this person, "just can't handle the truth" or does not want to handle the truth.

sugarbear1

most rehabs won't keep you, you are free to leave.......

Redmayne

Try to negotiate and compromise with all parties involved, which may not bring an immediate solution, but will help all parties involved, including yourself to focus on both the immediate and long term problem and assist you all in progressing the situation towards, hopefully a long term solution.

Accepting, as I'm sure you do, there are no 'quick fixes' in recovery, which at the end of the day is an individual responsibility, no matter how much may share their own or others experience, strength and hope.

Seeking advice from Al-Anon, might be a good idea to, good luck!

hopeful4

My X begged me to come get him at rehab. I did not, and in the end, he was glad I did not.

He's going through a hard time, rehab is no picnic. I second what someone said above, she should contact the clinic and speak to the person working with him. As someone else said, you can usually walk out anytime you truly wish to do so.

Soberwolf

I agree with Anna

Welcome Alicia its nice to meet you youl find a ton of support here

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Alicia!!

Ursula745

Sounds like he is possibly just past detox and in the beginning stages of trying to recover, which is a very emotional time for him. I'd contact the clinic. I can guarantee you almost every loved one of someone in rehab has received that phone call. Typically happens in the early stages of rehab or when someone isn't ready to stop using and just wants out. He's an adult. They can't hold him hostage.

She needs some alanon support for herself, and once she calls the clinic, maybe she can get get some peace of mind and get support for herself. He's not supposed to be in contact for a reason, and this is a good one.

MIRecovery

Any rehab is not a death sentence but it sure can feel like one when they don't let you drink. His problems brought back memories of a humorous song that was popular when I was young called Camp Granada

Hello muddah, hello faddah
Here I am at Camp Granada
Camp is very entertaining
And they say we'll have some fun if it stops raining.

I went hiking with Joe Spivy.
He developed poison ivy.
You remember Leonard Skinner
He got ptomaine poisoning last night after dinner.

All the counselors hate the waiters
And the lake has alligators
And the head coach wants no sissies
So he reads to us from something called Ulysses.

Now I don't want this should scare ya
But my bunkmate has malaria.
You remember Jeffrey Hardy
They're about to organize a searching party.

Take me home, oh muddah, fadduh
Take me home, I hate Granada!
Don't leave me out in the forest

Where I might get eaten by a bear.

Take me home, I promise I will not make noise,
Or mes the house with other boys.
Oh, please don't make me stay,
I've been here one whole day.

Dearest fadduh, darling muddah,
How's my precious little bruddah?
Let me come home, if you miss me
I would even let Aunt Bertha hug and kiss me.

Wait a minute, it's stopped hailing.
Guys are swimming, guys are sailing
Playing baseball, gee that's bettah
Muddah, faddah kindly disregard this letter

Anatolian

any update on this situation? How reputable is the clinic?