geno198

I haven't seen or heard much about sponsors, only that it would be good if I got 1. I have never had a sponsor, so I ask SR, what am I looking for?

Redmayne

All you're looking for in a sponsor,other than what's offered on this sit, is ideally someone who can fully explained the contents of the book 'Alcoholics Anonymous', particularly ,'The Doctor's Opinion' and the first 164 pages, I'm referring to the 4th Ed., others may vary. Who will then 'walk' you through the suggested 12 step progam of recovery.Anything else they offer is optional ...so long as it goes some way to enhance you recovery. Stick with one sponsor at a time, otherwise you'll confuse them and yourself...OR

Dependant on the availability of funds, buy a set of CD's recorded by 'Charlie and Joe do the 12 Steps', there may be others, although I'd recommend them, you can get them from Amazon. Then you can do it at your own pace, accepting it lac ks the personal touch.

At the end of the day , anyone's recovery and sobriety is a matter for them, so it's quite personal, no one can do it for you...

biminiblue

AA's site has this helpful pamphlet/description of sponsorship:

Alcoholics Anonymous : Questions and Answers on Sponsorship

sobercatholic

Good, solid sobriety; shares in meetings so that you have an idea as to their approach to AA (important for compatibility.)

Maybe also a certain degree of respect for any religious/spiritual beliefs you may hold. Many people find that their religious faith or spiritual traditions to be an important part of their recovery, they find comfort, strength and solace. You might not want someone who will undermine that. You've got enough to deal with without having whatever support you've already got, challenged.

Other than that, what others have said, their apparent ability to walk you through the 12 Steps as outlined in the Big Book and 12 and 12, and their availability to being contacted daily or several times a week. They should be available to you as often as needed (certain circumstances permitting of course, like work, family, etc.)

matt4x4

You should look for someone who works the program out of the book, and does not work his own program.

Redmayne

The question arise, what in turn should any prospective sponsor look for in you?

Perhaps, as it say in the 2nd para. of Chapter 3 ,'More About Alcoholism in the book, 'Alcoholics Anonymous, that you are fully reconciled that you suffer from alcoholism?

Together with the first line of Chapter 5 that say,'Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path.'

Two prerequisite, I believe necessary requirements before anyone can seek recovery, never mind a sponsor... just a thought.

I hope this helps....

SoberCAH

Sobercatholic and Redmayne both summarize the considerations relating to sponsor selection very well.

I have had the same sponsor, who has been my only sponsor, for many years.

He insists that I work the steps, which has now largely become habit with me.

I wish you the best with your choice.

trachemys

Great smile. Slim ankles. Geez, try em till you find one.

sobercatholic

One thing that I like about the Men's Group I've been attending is at the beginning of the meeting, anyone who is willing to be a "temporary sponsor" raises their hands. That is a great idea, which I wish was everywhere. It removes any guilt or nerves one may have over the possibility of "What if I don't like 'em?" Easy, you're both entering the relationship knowing that it's temporary; if it works out, great!

b086

i was recommended to look for someone who "had something i wanted"...for example: long term sobriety, a positive attitude, the ability to deal with life on life's terms, a quality of calmness, contentedness with life, etc.

Grant93

Closed mouth friend is a feature that is a must. In meetings share in a general way but to clean house, one needs a closed mouth friend.

Suggest: not a family member. Suggest: same sex. Suggest: one that has a sponsor and has done the steps with a sponsor.

Sponsors are the travel guide thru sobriety. One wouldn't go to the Serengeti without a guide. A map is good too. SO get and use the Big Book. God bless.

Mountainmanbob

One who is well studied in the Big Book,

and worked the Steps.

MM