Mo S

With all the "recover talk" around here, I ponder ; what does that mean to me. Yes, a day without a drink or drug, However with alot of work; it also means self actualization, being open to miracles and loving myself. It means having dreams and doing the work to achieve them. I means living outside the box and thinking for myself now that I have been as close to "restored to sanity" as I will get. It means becoming the person I was menat to be.

What about you?

Lilmssunshine

To me it means recovering from unhealthy ways of thinking and acting. Im "recovering" so I can be healthy, mind and body. Kind of like recovering from a cold..we all would take steps to recover from a cold by drinking juice, getting rest etc. Im giving my mind and body TLC, the steps to recovery are kinda like my vitamin c!

Redmayne

To me, what recovery means to me is perfectly described on page 275, of Alcoholics Anonymuos, 4th Ed., in the story,'The Keys of the Kingdom' in the para that begings,'A.A. is not a planfor recovery that can be finished and done with.' Everything that follows is tells of what life is like in recovery, but as it clearly states,'Others mayidle in a retrogressive groove....but retrogression can spell death for us'.

The part that I enjoy the most is where it talks of,'limitless expansion' no that's what recovery means to me!

stillsleeping

Hi Mo

To me it's about getting back the things I'd lost. You know in the sense of "The thieves were apprehended but police have yet to recover the gold" heh heh.

I lost so much to booze. Now I'm working hard to get it back.

Nice thread.

Mo S

guess no one else has reflected on what recovery really does mean to them 3 replies lol.

Boleo

Abstinence is not drinking and feeling bad about it

Recovery is not drinking and feeling good about it

I used to use booze to feel good about not dealing with life

Now I use life to feel good about not dealing with booze.

Gottalife

I recovered when the obsession was lifted and I had a spiritual awakening as the result of taking the steps. I was no longer emotionally and spritually crippled and I could resume my natural growth path both spiritually and, for me, through adolesence to adulthood. By continuing to apply these principles in all my affairs to the best of my ability, there seems no limit on the possibilities for spirtual growth.

God bless,
MikeH.

miamifella

When I was in active addiction I was optimistic. It seemed like an odd detour in my life and I just knew I would eventually beat it.

In recovery, I lost the optimism. But I gained a more mature appreciation for my own limits and mortality. I recognize both my faults and my achievements more clearly. Sometimes I remember life before I became an addict and realize that I did not know myself and could not accept myself in the way I do now.

Is this all from just getting older or from entering recovery? I do not know. But I am glad I am where I am now.

NYCDoglvr

In the Big Book it says "drinking was but a symptom." Alcoholism is classified as a mental illness for a very good reason: we're sick puppies. If we don't change we'll drink again. That hard work is recovery.

cat4554

Mike in New Zealand,

May I ask how did you get rid of your obsession ? How long did it take ? Lastly, what happened in your spiritual awakening ?

My husband ,of 31 years, and I are separated over 2+ years. He is an alcoholic. I love him and I know he loves me but I can't do this anymore and quite frankly, he wants his private life and all it brings.

Frenzy

I guess to me it means a new chapter in my life, one for which I'm uncertain . It means denying myself of something that had become part of me, I'm not sure of who I will become with it.
Recovery is something that I'm having to do rather than wanting to do at the moment, I hope that changes.

BillyPilgrim

For me it is being aware of the things around me. My senses were dulled with alcohol, so the smell of a spring day is sufficient reward in recovery.
I have gained so much , but noticing the detail is the important one.

frances2011

Recovery for me is feeling happy most of the day, most days.

This was impossible to me before, when I was drinking and obsessing.

Recovery for me is the certainty and gratitude of enjoying my life today, instead of someday-maybe.

LDT

For me, "recovery" simply means healing.....I'm in a perpetual state of healing....and I like it.

Gottalife

Those are big questions. The obsession seemed to lift at about the three month mark. That's when I remember changing from staying sober out of fear, to wanting to stay sober because it looked so attractive. At the same time I took two other actions, I found out how to pray and started doing that, and I made a decision to jump into AA boots and all and do whatever it took. These two things amount to the third step. At the time I had an IQ of about my shoe size and the emotional age of 13 so I didn't have much of an idea in an intelectual sense of what i was doing. However being stupid is not a handicap in AA. Infact when I see how some intellectuals stuggle I think stupidity is a blessing.
Have a look at appendix two in the Big Book which describes the spiritual awakening. Mine was of the educational variety and consisted of a change of personality sufficient to bring about recovery from alcoholism. There were many changes which I only noticed in hindsight. the first I guess was feeling the need to take the 4th and 5th steps, which was completely against my will. then there was the feeling I got after the 5th which is described exactly in the BB page 75. Then there were the promises on page 83 which happened as I made amends. And during all this certain character defects were removed. All this happened without any effort from me, I don't really know how. What I do know is that I did what they did, and I got what they got. That's about the best way I can put it.

I am so sorry to hear about your husband. 31 years is such a big part of your life. If you can, read chapters 7 and 8 in the BB and you might pick up some ideas and what you could do to help your husband. One of the best things you could do, for yourself, would be to join Alanon. They know how to help you get your life back. This disease is a family disease and often family members need as much help as the alcoholic.

miamifella

Thinking about this more I feel it is important to say one thing that recovery is not. I was not a drug user or drinker for the first 30-some years of my life. For a long time, I wanted to go back to the person I was then.

I cannot. I changed.

Rather than trying to regain something I once had, I have to build something new.

cat4554

Mike, thanks for taking the time to write back to me. What Big Book ?
BTW, I do attend Al Anon. It is my salvation.

Gottalife

The correct title for the book I refer to is Alcoholics Anonymous. Someone may have the link to an online copy.

NoelleR

It's located on AA's official website..................:

Big Book On Line


(o:
NoelleR

onlythetruth

For me, this thing people call "recovery" is nothing more than abstaining from alcohol and then growing up.