Back, and trying again
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: NY
Posts: 63
Back, and trying again
Hi all,
I was here sometime in November, thought I was doing so good, then that split second desicion to drink got me again. It is amazing, and scary, how fast it happens. I was on & off all through the holidays. Today is 10 day for me, and I'm feeling good. I never have physical withdrawal symptoms, luckily, maybe because I wasn't a daily drinker. It's totally a mental obsession with me. I've suffered depression for years and I drink to get rid of that black cloud over my head, nothing else works. I was on an anti-depressant for 6 months, gained 20 lbs, ugh, and went off of it. No insurance either. I have only made it to day 10 sober one other time in my 5 years of drinking, so tomorrow, day 11, will be the longest I've ever stopped, that feels good, and my determination is strong right now.
I'm trying to do it by myself, I just can't bring myself to ask for help again. I was in therapy a few years ago, but honestly it wasn't helping at all. Maybe I wasn't ready then. I'm taking it one day at a time. I read this forum every day, even when I was drinking, lots of great posts. It's nice to know I'm not alone. Thank-you for reading. ;O) ~Just realized I posted in the wrong forum, whoops....
I was here sometime in November, thought I was doing so good, then that split second desicion to drink got me again. It is amazing, and scary, how fast it happens. I was on & off all through the holidays. Today is 10 day for me, and I'm feeling good. I never have physical withdrawal symptoms, luckily, maybe because I wasn't a daily drinker. It's totally a mental obsession with me. I've suffered depression for years and I drink to get rid of that black cloud over my head, nothing else works. I was on an anti-depressant for 6 months, gained 20 lbs, ugh, and went off of it. No insurance either. I have only made it to day 10 sober one other time in my 5 years of drinking, so tomorrow, day 11, will be the longest I've ever stopped, that feels good, and my determination is strong right now.
I'm trying to do it by myself, I just can't bring myself to ask for help again. I was in therapy a few years ago, but honestly it wasn't helping at all. Maybe I wasn't ready then. I'm taking it one day at a time. I read this forum every day, even when I was drinking, lots of great posts. It's nice to know I'm not alone. Thank-you for reading. ;O) ~Just realized I posted in the wrong forum, whoops....
Last edited by undercoverangel; 01-10-2011 at 09:55 AM. Reason: sp
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
Welcome back!! I did get help, with IOP and meetings, way back when, but I wasn't ready, then. It took me a few harsh consequences, hitting a really low bottom, before I was. SR has been huge in my recovery, and it IS great knowing we're not alone and people "get" us.
Congrats on day 10!
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Congrats on day 10!
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
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