kyb5

I always thought of it as not being drunk. Is it that or is it not drinking at all?

I mean if you just have 1 drink you're not drunk or intoxicated so you are sober right?

I'm not saying I'm going to do anything just wonder others thoughts.



.

Toronto68

Well, in this context, when we talk about being sober, we mean we don't drink anymore.

When it comes to living with alcohol, being sober means not being intoxicated or unfit to run a machine or a vehicle, for example. (Or without alcohol in the system period, of course.)

yeahgr8

Sober for most people means without alcohol or drugs or any mind altering substance...some people associate being sober with alcohol alone and being clean with drugs.

Personally being sober, from a very early age, has me thinking of someone who is rock solid reliable, strong person who is stone cold sober and ready for anything...funny how a word can conjure up different perceptions for us...

And at the end of the day it's just a word, the world tends to judge us by our actions:-)

Ceres

Yeah, I'll have to go with the definition that the general population sees it as. Which is alcohol/drug free. When I tell a nonalcoholic that I'm sober, it's typically understood that I do not drink at all.

Sobriety, I see different. Sobriety is devoid of all mind closing chemicals or thoughts.

NoelleR

For me 'sober' and 'clean' can be used interchangably, however, if I'm in an AA meeting I use terms such as 'alcoholic' and 'sober' and when in an NA meeting I use terms such as 'addict' and 'clean' .....

"...some people associate being sober with alcohol alone and being clean with drugs..."

I've found this to be the case because NA (the organization and its members) brought out the term 'clean' to mean free from all mind-altering substances and AA (the organization, not AAer's) has its 'Singleness of Purpose' and has defined the term 'sobriety' to mean 'freedom from alcohol' (note they only say freedom from alcohol, and not freedom from all mind-altering substances; if they did that then they would be NA).

I'm an 'alcoholic/addict' (a redundancy) who is 'clean and sober' (another redundancy)......

Think I'll make myself truly redundant and leave this forum, least for a while, that is........


(o:
NoelleR

coffeenut

Being sober means I'm not ashamed of myself anymore.

Regrets are few.

FlipflopGal

Being sober to me means dealing with lifes ups and downs free from alcohol. Not having to destroy my family over my selfish acts. To me it also means, learning how to love myself and be accepting of who I am.

least

Not to my understanding. Sober means not drinking at all. Because I am an alcoholic, I cannot have "just one drink" - it always ends up being more, sooner or later. Safer not to drink at all.

LaVallette

^^^ + 1.

crzylilmndfreak

ive wondered the exact same thing, because i havent had a drink since Dec. 28th, but i did abuse prescription meds for the last several months, i have two weeks now free from that,...my sponsor from AA says being "sober" means free from all mind altering substances, and that i still need to introduce myself as a newcomer in AA, but everytime i do i feel wierd about it... on Fri. we had an AA meeting at the outpatient program and i stood up for my 4 mo. chip, and later told my husband, and he said that in his eyes i was not "sober" and basically well i basically took it that he was saying that i was not worthy of the chip. So in my other outside AA meetings now, i dont know where i stand, and i am totally lost with this whole "sober" things as well.
crys

Mark75

It's not about worthiness. We are all worthy . It's more about how honesty with yourself is part of recovery. Snorting pills for the thrill of it, I can't remember how you put it exactly... If that's your idea of sobriety, well, OK. Seems that maybe you should look at that closely though in your journey of rigorous honesty and recovey.

Recovery is there for you when your ready. Just don't wait until it's too late. We all want you to succeed!!

Mark

freya

I think it depends on the individual.

I am not an alcoholic, but still, I wouldn't say that I was sober if I had had a drink in the past few hours -- I certianly wouldn't say I was (nor would I be) drunk, but I wouldn't be technically sober either.

For the vast majority of the self-identified alcoholics I know, "sobriety" means total abstention from alcohol...and from any other drugs other than exactly as prescibed by a doctor for a legitimate reason.

For all of the self-identified recovered/recovering alcoholics I know and whose recoveries I respect and admire, "sobriety" mean abstention from alcohol and focused attention on their ever-continuing healing and spiritual journies.

I do know a few alcoholics and/or addicts who claim to be sober but who continue to "do" other drugs. I personally find that these people are -- without exception -- not the kind of people whose recoveries (even apart from the fact that they are doing other drugs) I admire or respect, nor are they people with whom I choose to spend my time.

Also, for myself, I very clearly distinguish between "dryness" and "sobriety." Sobriety = not drinking + actively recovering emotionally and spiritually. And, because I respect and admire the work and effort that true recovery takes so much, I try to avoid talking in ways that confuse the 2.

There is one situation that has been particularly problematic for me in this regard. It involves a woman with whom a sponsee of mine was involved for awhile. This woman has not had a drink -- as far as I know -- in almost 3 years, but she abuses prescription drugs extensively. She is also quite arrogant and manipulative, and there have been occasions in the past on which she just like gets with people in a recovery context and starts going on and on about her sobriety -- just like trying to incite someone to question her or to call her on it to her face or something. Typically, I just side-step the issue by ignoring her or by saying, if I have to say anything, "I'm glad you haven't had a drink in X amount of time," or something similar, and usually she backs off.

However, last time she tried to run her game on me, she was quite aggressive about it and would not let it drop, and finally I said: "Listen, I realize it's hard for you not to drink and I'm gald that you're not drinking....but it's really too bad that it's so much harder for you to really be honest" and just walked away.

I don't see any sense in arguing with such people if I can possibly avoid it, but neither am I going to co-sign their b*llsh*t.

freya

artsoul

For me right now, being sober means:

No more dreading the next morning
Being able to look in the mirror and not see the face of sadness
Enjoying a meal again
Not wondering what's going on with my liver, esophagus and brain
Spending a night without heart palpatations and sweats
Being able to answer the phone without fear
Looking outside and actually seeing what kind of day it is
No more sneaking around
Living without constant anxiety
Remembering things clearly
Being able to smile and mean it
Thinking that life just might be full of possibilities again
Finding friends at SR

crzylilmndfreak

The last time i snorted my script was Feb. 16. i totally know that that is NOT sobriety,, its not alchol, but its not sobriety either, other than that i have only abused in the way as taking my nightime meds in the morn., for a little bit of a loopy feeling, now is that sobriety? totally confused here
crys

Dee74

Do you really think it's sobriety Crys?

I know for me? if I'm chasing a high, or a buzz, or a 'loopy feeling' - anything that alters my mind - it's the same feeling I used to drink for, or smoke pot for - and to me its not sobriety.

D

crzylilmndfreak

so the last time i took my nighttime med in the morn to feel loopy was April 15 so when i go to my AA meeting i should still announce myself as a newcomer? please, this is weighing so heavy on my mind, i really need some good advice here, i know it should ultimately be my choice, but i am at a loss
Crys

Mark75

Hi crys!

Why? That is the question to ask yourself. Why did you take your night time medication in the morning?

Glad you're here asking.

Mark

crzylilmndfreak

i took it in the morning to feel more relaxed, just a general sort of "loopy,relaxed" feeling, but i havent done that in a couple weeks, but still does this constitute introducing myself as a newcomer at an AA meeting?
crys

Mark75

I guess I am trying to give advice, when I should only be sharing my own experience. Since I do not have much experience to share in this regard, since I started recovery, I can only ask you a question or two...

Do you equate taking anything in a way other than prescribed, in order to get loopy and relaxed... to sobriety? Is how you introduce yourself at an AA meeting more important than being true to yourself?

I took lots of pills in ways other than how they were prescribed. I am no different from you.

Mark

Dee74

I agree with Mark Krys - I think the important issue here is being true and honest with yourself, not the introduction at the next meeting.

I have no more experience to offer either, but I wish you well whatever you decide
D