Emeraldstorm

Times are changing, and so should AA. When I go to AA with my boyfriend I feel like I'm stepping 20-30 years into the past. AA is NOT good for young people, as much as some people would disagree.

I'm 24 years old, and I'll admit, I used to party like crazy. When I was in high school I did pills and snorted anything that was handed to me, when I was 18-21 I was going out to parties every night, drinking and smoking weed. I've stopped doing everything, and now I'm a full-time college student who made the deans list last semester...

So of course I still have friends (including my boyfriend) who can not stop partying. They find excuses to party....like it's Friday night....or there is a huge party...or some other reason to fit in and look cool...BUT when I sit down and talk to my boyfriend AND friends that are having problems quitting, but really really want to what I am supposed to say? Go to AA?? AA scares people my age! Depressed older people and God...lol I mean come on! It may be good for the older generation, but not for kids my age. The whole point of AA is to make friends with people who are going through the same thing and to have a spiritual awaking. No offence to older people, but people my age don't want to make friends with people in their 50's....We just need to make AA look cool and show people my age that being sober is amazing.

Something needs to be done! We need to get young people who WANT to quit a fighting chance before it's too late..

I think another reason AA doesn't work for people my age is because the word God scares them. I'm not sure about this, but I pretty sure my generation (Gen Y) has come to believe science over religion.

I believe in a higher power, religion is stupid, but the ideas that come from every religion is not..I believe in those ideas....I think AA should find another approach and not call it God...just call it a higher power or something....

Becoming mindful was how I quit drugs. I made the unconscious conscious. I believe in a higher power....I really do...we just have to make other kids my age believe this and not scare them off with words like "God"...

So how should I start? I want to help....really bad...

Write a book...start and organization...i'm clueless here, but feel like this needs to be done..

Chops

The primary purpose is to stay sober and help others to achieve sobriety. I could care less about making friends there to be honest....

I'm 33 BTW and I am not sure that is considered young:-)

Emeraldstorm

Lol 33 is young!

I just feel like since times are changing, so should AA...
I feel like they should reach out to younger people...
Or I wish there was some sort of organization that was reaching out to younger people...

ElegantlyWasted

I'm most areas there are AA groups specifically for you and others under 40? Ask around or do a little google research. Some people like the SMART live group meetings. SMART can be just as effective, doesn't focus on God, and attracts a younger demographic. That being said some relatively young people get a heck of a lot ot of having a crusty oldtimer with some good sobriety under their belt. Remember; they were once where you are now. You could even mix it up with different recovery options, and figure out what you are most comfortable with.... Ie. Crusty old mentor combined with you mostly attending young peoples meetings and or smart work etc. Remember you're in charge, try to be honest with yourself and figure out what works for you... You could always start your own chapter.

Astro

If it ain't broke, don't fix it

Just my experience, I go to large AA meetings, 100+ in attendance. Our youngest members are in their mid-teens (like 15) and our oldest member is in his 90's. We all have much to share with each other. Some of the younger members have started their own meetings, and we all hang out together for BBQ's, dances, etc.

Ever heard of this? ACYPAA 2010

I'm almost 46, who are you calling old? Lol

Emeraldstorm

There is ONE meeting in my city that aims towards younger people, but most of the kids there are there because they are court ordered...

I dunno maybe it's the city I'm in...I mean I do live in Florida...lol

Gonna go check SMART out right now! Thanks for the advice! x

least

I have friends of all ages. Age doesn't matter in friendship, at least not to me. As to revamping AA... Can you start your own group? Seriously. If you know a lot of young people who attend meetings, can you get together with them and form a group of your own? They have women's meetings, and other 'special' meetings. I don't see why you couldn't have a young peoples' meeting. Give it a shot, what have you got to lose?

Emeraldstorm

Ever heard of this? ACYPAA 2010


I haven't heard of that, but I'll check it out...I wasn't really sure what to look up...I've only had experience with AA in my town and thats it...thanks for all the advice and links!! :ghug3

Emeraldstorm

oooh they should make one of these in Florida!!!

outtolunch

There are meetings for young people in some locations.

Some people, regardless of age, do not connect with 12 Steps or AA for many reasons. Here are some of those reasons:

Immaturity blinds them to the commonality of purpose.

A mistaken belief that alcohol is the problem.

A mistaken belief that AA will satisfy a social need and should be cool and fun.

Terminal Uniqueness Syndrom: The belief that my situation is different and I am special.

Looking for that magic bullet that will cure them, instead of all the hard work that is necessary to address the underlying issues, regardless if it's AA or some other kind of program.

12 steps /AA is not for everyone. And not everyone is willing to do what they need to do to adress their own issues, regardless of where they do it or how.

ElegantlyWasted

" The whole point of AA is to make friends with people who are going through the same thing and to have a spiritual awaking."

To me that is a big part of it, but the main point to me is simply not to drink. The spiritual awakening thing is great and unique to each individual. PS stay away from guru's that want to be paid for sweat shop meditations. Best of luck and keep us posted. In our area there are alot of young AAers that regularly party sober together. Took me a couple of dry months (where r u?), but I have as much fun now in social situations sober as I ever did using. Welcome to the journey!!!

Emeraldstorm

OMG THANKKK YOU for directing me to SMART!! This is exactly what I was looking for!!!!! x

Astro

Partying sober. Now there's a novel concept Who would've thought it's even possible?

Ceres

Hey,

Those old men are much more like you than you think! One of my bests friends is 64. I'm 37. It's because emotionally he's like 19 and I'm like 17. This will make sense soon enough.

Besides, I find it comforting when I hear 'ol Leonard tell the same story, over and over, again. You can practically lip-sinc it. Sometimes we call on him just for the hell of it. ;-) It's all good. With any luck I'll be doing the same thing in my 70's.

Whadahay

A spiritual connection with everyone regardless of age is walking on the Winner's path. Please do not segregate. We are ALL on different paths of our recovery. But the fact is, the AA meetings are about recovery and is not a dating club. When in the meetings, our focus needs to be on working on the 12 Steps.

You can goof off all you want, but you aren't helping yourself any. Because you are young isn't a valid excuse for being disrespectful of others.

keithj

But it does work for people your age. I'm working with a guy who just turned 19 a couple weeks ago. He's been sober a couple months, worked all the Steps (still has a few amends hanging out there), and wants to carry the message. There is little doubt in my mind that this kid has undergone a profound transformation in his reaction to life. He's way more interested in helping others than he is concerned about himself.

Instead of complaining about AA, he's taking some action. First, he's a voting member of a home group. He has a service position in that group and he attends the monthly group conscience. He can express his views in that group the same as any old timer. And his views are given equal weight. These actions have given some experience with how a healthy group functions with regard to AA Traditions. Second, he's gathering up some other young folks and starting a new meeting focused on young people's attendance. He's looking for a time slot that will be attractive to young people and putting together a format to address application of the 12 Steps to young people's issues.

Action in accordance with AA tradition instead of complaints. He's able to do this because his own recovery is based on spiritual principles. Thus, his actions reflect those spiritual principles.

Emeraldstorm

I wasn't trying to be offensive to anyone. I don't have a problem with older people, I have a lot of older friends, and I love everyone.


I was just stating my opinion of the AA I went to (NOT FOR ME, FOR MY BOYFRIEND), and just observing the things that would prevent a younger person from wanting to quit. I just know how pretentious kids my age can be. At least here in Florida. They drink to look cool, and because EVERYONE ELSE is doing it. I just figured if they saw more younger plp at AA they would be more willing to try, instead of saying, well I still have some time to party....

I'm just worried about the welfare of my friends and loved ones that suffer from addiction. I wanted to get them to want something better for themselves. Everyone I know dogs on AA...so I was just trying to bring up the fact that times are changing, and so should AA's approach...

I am truly sorry if I offended anyone, please don't think that was my intention. I'm really happy I got some great advice on this topic! SMART recovery is exactly what I was looking for. I sent them a request to start a meeting here in my city, since the closest one was in Ft. Lauderdale, and I live in north Florida.

shaun00

...

or maybe it dont work because your not an alcoholic...

I'm interested to where you get that statistic that AA dont work for young alcoholics?

maybe its just your experience?......and if it is are you talking about not working "going to meetings" or not working after of taking all the steps....or maybe both..

in my experience it doesn't matter how old you are........if you have reached a level of desperation that can only be described and understood by another alkie...and are prepared to engage in a twelve step program......

age becomes irrelevant......
and i have worked with young people before...........guess what?
they act..feel....and drink like any other alkie.

i came into AA with a fear......a deep ingrained fear of god.
i changed that warped perception....through listening to others who had solved that dilema.......by praying..........and by completing the steps.

Emeraldstorm

I never said it was a statistic, it was an observation. An connection between my experience at AA, and my experience with my addicted friends who talk about AA. I hear the same thing from all of them.

"AA is a cult...AA is too religious...etc" I was just worried that they will never find help EVER. I just felt like I needed to do something, perhaps even start some sort of non-profit. I'm very attached to this subject, because many of my friends suffer from addiction. I used to be a druggie...I stopped...I never really made friends with plp who don't do drugs and drink....so trust me when I said ALOT of my friends are struggling with this...I want them to have some place to go...an alternative to AA...

What I didn't know was that the world already has alternatives that I (nor my loved ones) are aware of. SMART is exactly the kind of thing I was looking for. I just need to bring it to my city, which I plan on doing!

Like I said before, I REALLY wasn't trying to offend anyone, just stating my opinion.

shaun00

no offence to me.

i hear about smart but have no experience....

as ive said i believe if your desperate enough for a solution AA twelve steps will work perfectly if you engage in them with the same passion you drank.

i wonder how many youngsters turn up in AA Without that desperation"..and are unwilling to take certain steps and proclaim aa dont work.

maybe im basing that on what id be like at 18/19......i wasnt "powerless over nothin".....when i was 18.......lol