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New Member, Coming Clean - advice and support have my gratitude.

Old 07-01-2014, 04:13 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Good luck viktor. I hope u find peace with this. I wouldn't know how hard it would be to be addicted to simething. You hear a lot of stories about vets coming back from war injured and get put on meds and then get addicted. Its very sad to hear about.

I dnt have advise I just wish you the best of luck, and hope u can find peace.

Best wishes
Baby3times
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Old 07-01-2014, 07:19 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Many thanks, Baby3Times. I would only say that when you start something once, you never think of future consequence. I will see doctor on the 8th, I hold much hope that his advice and words offer help. My will power is strong, but I have never been in this place before. I have a 12 week supply of both pain killers, benzos, and Somas. They are locked away in safe. Difficulty in not opening it is very much, but I will continue to be strong.

What I have issue with now is, I am on suboxone - one 8mg strip in total through day. Yet injuries still bring horrible pain. I do not know if I should have more surgery or just return to opiates - but take them as told to, not abuse them.

Many thanks. Regards, Viktor.

*you seem like very good person. Not many exist today.
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Old 07-01-2014, 08:21 PM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Thanks viktor u seem like a very nice and good person as well. I hope ur able to stick to that strength sounds like ur ready! Best of wishes and honestly when it comes to pain it seems like taking it.would be needed, but like many things ur tollarence goes up.

Have u thought of natural medician? Like ciorpractor or however u spell that. I know they do wonders and think of more natural cures that help!
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Old 07-01-2014, 08:26 PM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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The issue with me and chiropractors is that I have zero cartilage in my spine. So an "adjustment" would produce no results.
Gratitude for the thoughts.
Regards.
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Old 07-01-2014, 09:43 PM
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Viktor - I think you are doing the right thing to go to the clinic in order to get through the benzo withdrawal the right way. You strike me as a strong willed person. I think it shows strength rather than weakness that you called them. It hurts our pride sometimes when we don't do everything on our own. You have people close to you that are counting on you, and you can't afford to put pride before them. You'll have plenty to be proud of when you get off all of that ****.

Also, as far as taking opis as prescribed goes I don't think that is in the cards. Once the opi genie is out of the bottle he doesn't go back in. Even if you were somehow able to get a magic box that dispensed the pills at regular doses you would just be torturing yourself with cravings 24/7. I used to tell myself that same thing every single month when I was taking pills. Every solemn promise to take them regularly was made when I was withdrawaling though. I failed at that every single time. That whole taking it as prescribed idea went right out the window as soon as the script was filled. The only opi I ever took as prescribed was H.
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Old 07-01-2014, 11:18 PM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Aghanistan (and surrounding areas but not Iran) has maybe the best poppy, opium, and purest heroin in the world - so I understand your joke about taking heroin as "prescribed". Lol.

But, if you have tried same path of thought as taking the painkillers - I will believe you. Somewhere inside of me knows that if open that bottle 4 are coming out, not just 1. That I may understand you better, OpioPhile - what was/is your drug of problem, and how did you bring into your body? I am trying to make comparison.

Many thanks, your experiences/advice offered as well as GI812Many seem to be most similar to myself, so I hold in much high regards.

Thank you all. Just honestly speaking to others in close situation offers much hope and wisdom. A "light at the end of tunnel" - Viktor
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Old 07-02-2014, 10:11 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Viktor - I identified as an oxy fiend for years. The old OC80s and/or roxis were my DOC. I would always sniff those. There would be vicodin / percocets in the mix as well taken orally, but that was just to fill in the gaps so I didn't withdrawal all the time. That went on for about 8 years, and then I switched to sniffing Opanas. That didn't hold me that long and I sniffed some H that a coworker had one day to avoid getting sick. I preferred the pills to the H when sniffed so I decided to go to IV. That was an economic decision more than anything because I was able to continue with the same habit at a fraction of the cost. It was a mistake of gigantic proportions because I had underestimated the difference between sniffed H and IV H. Also, there was no more of the BS with dealing with the doctors / pharmacists that I had come to loathe. It was all you want, whenever you want so long as you have the money. That was a really bad combination for me, and I got toasted.

When I was still dealing with the scripts though I would tell myself the same thing every single month - "I will be a good boy next month. There really isn't anything difficult about taking it as prescribed. I will just try harder and it will work out".
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Old 07-02-2014, 03:45 PM
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Did you seek pain management doctor ? And were you kicked out from clinic, or did you remove yourself from program?

Regards, Viktor.
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Old 07-02-2014, 04:51 PM
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I was with a pain management doctor at the end of the pill addiction. Prior to that I was procuring them from alternative methods. It wasn't long after I switched to H that I just stopped showing up to see the doctor.
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Old 07-02-2014, 04:54 PM
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Are you currently drug free, and if you are how much time has passed since use?
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Old 07-02-2014, 05:31 PM
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Yes. I am off of everything thank God. It was the middle of February of this year when I got clean. Prior to that I had quit in February 2012 and made it 1 1/2 years before screwing up last year. So I had about a six month relapse prior to quitting this February. I did use methadone for four days to ease the transition off of the H this time. That helped to make the withdrawal more bearable. Also, I took half a sub on the 7th day off of the methadone because it got overwhelming one night. The whole month of February was a blur and a struggle to survive. March was pretty ****** too, but that was because of non-withdrawal related issues. Things have improved greatly since then. They are still ups and downs, but such is life.
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Old 07-02-2014, 08:12 PM
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Viktor, you have alot of willpower if you have those and not touched them. I could never say the same about myself. You are incredible my friend if you can do that I would say you are most definitely on the right path!! You will beat this, I'm proud of uou!! I wish you the best of luck !!
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