Tron

How is everyone tonight? I'm looking for some company a little depressed but just wanna bs

PreciousThings

Hey TRON...I'm up for a bit. Got home from work a little while ago. I need to unwind for a bit before bed (even tho I have to wake up at 7AM for kids).

How ya doing?

Scolova

I'll probably be back later ... going to the grocery store now.
(Sometimes I wait until they stop selling the booze @midnight to go)
You could try the chatroom

Tron

Wanted too but won't let me on iPad. ( coolest thing I have ever boughten btw" lol )

PreciousThings

Ugh...that sux. Not the iPad, but the chat part.

Hang in there TRON....take it one moment at a time.

Tron

Yeah I am trying and chatting with people really helps.. Keeps me distracted, how long have you been sober?

PreciousThings

Not 100% sober yet. I'm currently on suboxone treatment. It's been almost 3 months since my last oxy.

Saw my doc today. I started to ween myself after the new year because I feel I'm ready. The doc agrees that I'm ready to cut down as well and we have a plan in place. Was on 16mg total per day (8mgs AM, 8mgs PM). Tomorrow I start 12mgs in AM and ween out the PM dose. Since subs are effective for 24 hours, we're cutting out the PM chaser dose. I'll stay with that for a couple of weeks, then cut down to only 8mgs in AM.

There are horror stories and success stories regarding subs. I've tried tapering and CT and I just failed miserably. My husband does not know of my addiction and I have 3 girls and I work as a bartender. Being dopesick just cant be in my recovery plan, unfortunately :-(

Tron

Wow. Well congrats on knowing the time was right.. How have the past 3 months treated you?

PreciousThings

For me, thus far, the best 3 months I've had in a long time. I feel fantastic!! I feel like the same person I was before oxys took over my life. Took a few weeks to get used to doing things sober. I have my triggers that make me think of using. That's when I just try to distract myself until the feeling passes.

How about you? You said you're feeling down? You having symptoms, or is your mind getting the best of you?

Tron

That's good to hear..how did ya ever get started? (don't have to answer that?) I am feeling depressed and very physically tired but that's part of the withdrawals.. (so the Internet tells me) I am just goin day by day.. I feel like this addiction will be easier for me just because I feel very confident and have all the motivation/support in the world so ima be ok

PreciousThings

Having support is so important when it comes to getting clean. That's why I came here. There are some very wise and experienced people here. I lurked here for months before getting up the courage to sign up. I'm a very outgoing person, but when it comes to addiction and admitting your an addict, I was nervous to share. Now I try to come here every day to read and learn and hopefully reach out to others that need help too.

I found that melatonin is a great supplement to take to help relax. Just took one now so I can hit the hay. I have sleep issues that go back to before my drug ust.

In my 20's I used to casually take them for fun with friends. Once or twice a month. Not a big deal.

It was actually 3 consecutive surgeries that got me dependent. After the scripts ran out, I bought off the street for over a year to get high and to avoid getting dope sick. I was not longer dependent....I was an addict.

When I was up to anywhere from 90mg-180mg a day and didn't feel so good anymore, I realized I was taking these pills and spending all my money to avoid being sick. It wasn't fun anymore. The worries about my stash, counting and searcing and driving anywhere to get them....just got exhausting.

I'd wake up 15 minutes before my kids, all teary eyes and lethargic, to take a piece so I could get them breakfast and off to school. I just realized that it was a sad way to live and that I just wasn't living at all. I decided after my 35th birthday that it was time to get help from doctor.

I did my research on homeopathic remedies and Dr. supervised subs.

My spouse and I have had marital trouble for years. He's really not my friend, so I couldn't confide in him. The subs were my answer.

I'm still doing well, and realistically speaking, I hope to be pill free by spring.

I admire your CT route. I admire everone going that route. It shows tremendous strength and willpower.

Good for u!!!!

Tron

Wow. That's a sad story I'm sorry about your marital issues and hopefully you guys can work on it, if desired. That's good you realized you wanted more and enough to start your sobriety.. Amazing realizing how much of life you are actually missing out on huh?