My Third Step
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 216
My Third Step
Step 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of
God as we understood Him.
How do I feel about turning my life over to a Higher Power for guidance?
Good. It’s better than my guidance. I have tried to do this on my own and it was a disaster. I know that I am not all-powerful now and I’ve made a mess of my life and others while trying to control what was not mine to control.
How do I know who or what my Higher Power is?
I think my higher power is other people in recovery. I’m still not comfortable with the God of my understanding.
Am I willing to try to turn my problems over?
I’m ready to let go of them if that’s what this means. Trying to muddle my way threw them has done nothing for me.
What could help me to be willing?
The thought of serenity and leaving the chaos behind
How can I stop thinking, trying and considering, and actually make a decision?
By taking a step back and allowing peace before I make a decision
Have I had a problem making decisions in my life?
Yes! I’ve always been on the fence and I think it was because the decision I was making was taking others into consideration. Of course, I can’t do that and have it turn out like I thought it would. This is controlling
Give examples.
Oh, lord, every decision was if this happened or that happened. I still do this, but not as much. Like, a new job. I was stuck in a job I did not like and I just stayed there, listening to other people and what they thought I should do.
If my sister asked me to do something, I would automatically do it, never considering if I really wanted to do it.
My children would ask for something, and I would do it rather than think about it first.
If I am unable to make this decision, what holds me back?
The uncertainty of what will happen. I would actually have to own it. I don’t think I had enough self esteem to think I could make a good decision. Also, if it wasn’t the right one, I had to own the consequences and felt like a failure.
Do I trust my Higher Power to take care of me?
I’m beginning to. I lay low for a while and give some things over that I just can’t figure out what I need to do with it.
How might Step Three help me keep my hands off situations created by others?
I’ve not had a good track record with trying to help situations created by my adult children. It has usually flopped and then I was angry. I think I can love from a distance.
What consequences have I had by obsessing on problems and other people?
I’ve lost myself in the process, not even being able to look in a mirror and like what I see. It has taken the focus off of me and I felt empty.
When I “Let Go and Let God” take care of my life, am I willing to follow the guidance I receive?
Yes!!! So far, it has restored me to some good thinking. I still jump the gun sometimes, but it’s not as often.
How can I turn a situation over and let go of the results?
By doing just that….leaving it alone if it’s not of my making.
How can I stop myself from taking my will back?
By remembering how chaotic my life was.
What can I do when my loved ones make decisions I don’t like?
Leave it to them. Let them have the dignity of allowing them mistakes and fixing it.
How can I let my loved ones find their own life paths as I am finding mine?
Detaching with whatever love I can. Sometimes I’m still grieving over the loss of their potential, but I need to remember that I want the same thing…my own path in life.
What can I do to try to see others as God sees them?
Realize that God does love them, no matter what. Then, it makes it easier to love them too,,,mistakes and all.
How can I express God’s will in my actions and words towards others, including the alcoholic?
By giving them free will to do as they please. I think this allows me the same.
God as we understood Him.
How do I feel about turning my life over to a Higher Power for guidance?
Good. It’s better than my guidance. I have tried to do this on my own and it was a disaster. I know that I am not all-powerful now and I’ve made a mess of my life and others while trying to control what was not mine to control.
How do I know who or what my Higher Power is?
I think my higher power is other people in recovery. I’m still not comfortable with the God of my understanding.
Am I willing to try to turn my problems over?
I’m ready to let go of them if that’s what this means. Trying to muddle my way threw them has done nothing for me.
What could help me to be willing?
The thought of serenity and leaving the chaos behind
How can I stop thinking, trying and considering, and actually make a decision?
By taking a step back and allowing peace before I make a decision
Have I had a problem making decisions in my life?
Yes! I’ve always been on the fence and I think it was because the decision I was making was taking others into consideration. Of course, I can’t do that and have it turn out like I thought it would. This is controlling
Give examples.
Oh, lord, every decision was if this happened or that happened. I still do this, but not as much. Like, a new job. I was stuck in a job I did not like and I just stayed there, listening to other people and what they thought I should do.
If my sister asked me to do something, I would automatically do it, never considering if I really wanted to do it.
My children would ask for something, and I would do it rather than think about it first.
If I am unable to make this decision, what holds me back?
The uncertainty of what will happen. I would actually have to own it. I don’t think I had enough self esteem to think I could make a good decision. Also, if it wasn’t the right one, I had to own the consequences and felt like a failure.
Do I trust my Higher Power to take care of me?
I’m beginning to. I lay low for a while and give some things over that I just can’t figure out what I need to do with it.
How might Step Three help me keep my hands off situations created by others?
I’ve not had a good track record with trying to help situations created by my adult children. It has usually flopped and then I was angry. I think I can love from a distance.
What consequences have I had by obsessing on problems and other people?
I’ve lost myself in the process, not even being able to look in a mirror and like what I see. It has taken the focus off of me and I felt empty.
When I “Let Go and Let God” take care of my life, am I willing to follow the guidance I receive?
Yes!!! So far, it has restored me to some good thinking. I still jump the gun sometimes, but it’s not as often.
How can I turn a situation over and let go of the results?
By doing just that….leaving it alone if it’s not of my making.
How can I stop myself from taking my will back?
By remembering how chaotic my life was.
What can I do when my loved ones make decisions I don’t like?
Leave it to them. Let them have the dignity of allowing them mistakes and fixing it.
How can I let my loved ones find their own life paths as I am finding mine?
Detaching with whatever love I can. Sometimes I’m still grieving over the loss of their potential, but I need to remember that I want the same thing…my own path in life.
What can I do to try to see others as God sees them?
Realize that God does love them, no matter what. Then, it makes it easier to love them too,,,mistakes and all.
How can I express God’s will in my actions and words towards others, including the alcoholic?
By giving them free will to do as they please. I think this allows me the same.
i've done my almost
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
Congrats on working step 3!
All you gotta do here is make a decision. Nothing more, nothing less.
More will be revealed as you work the rest of the steps (and this isn't a cryptic message, it's just that we all have a unique experience and you will too).
Keep it up and get ready for the ride of your life.
Kjell~
All you gotta do here is make a decision. Nothing more, nothing less.
More will be revealed as you work the rest of the steps (and this isn't a cryptic message, it's just that we all have a unique experience and you will too).
Keep it up and get ready for the ride of your life.
Kjell~
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