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Discussion thread for those without a HP recovering from substance abuse

Old 08-10-2006, 04:01 AM
  # 81 (permalink)  
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Did you know there are two UN countries that hjaven't ratify the UN Covention on the rights of the child; Somalia which has been a collapsed state for over decades and the US.

I'm not saying that as a judgement on americans - but I see more sense in understanding that as a voting/lobbying issue than attempting to delve into the morality of hypothetical criminals (or real criminals but doing the task with a fraction of the info).

One of the best parts of leaving the fight between good and evil behind was it freeing up my mind to think in terms of consequences of actions, reasoning and ethics.

Edit - I changed won't ratify to haven't after double checking my own references!! Somalia can't because it has no state and the US have signed the convention suggestion that at some point they will ratify it. However it still don't look pretty to be clumped with somalia!
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Old 09-15-2006, 07:24 PM
  # 82 (permalink)  
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Hi Autumn

Spirituality is no better than having none, because most of my AA peers that relapse repeatedly use Higher Power. It does not matter which way of doing things has the most relapses, but there is enough failures and successes on both sides to prove that neither is a prerequisite or a requirement for becoming sober and becoming a better person.

Abbadun


Originally Posted by Autumn
More recently than ever, I have been reaffirming to myself how important it is to be able work through the myriad of problems that life presents without a HP, be that HP a group, a tree..... whatever.

Spirituality is inviting, and may even figure as part of my future, but it's just too uncertain a solution at this point. In fact, I don't ever want to rely on a HP as a solution for anything. Solace maybe. I'm in the pursuit of some good guided meditation CDs or DVDs. Meditation is a fabulous outlet for the stress and chaos of everyday living, and puts us in touch with our inner-most selves (and even gets us "outside" ourselves at times).
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Old 09-15-2006, 08:17 PM
  # 83 (permalink)  
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Wow, I can't believe I missed this thread! Actually, very timely that it popped back up to the top today -- I think I've always been looking for "something". Especially today. Probably always will be. I'm a tangible kind of girl. I like to see things and touch them, feel them. I hope you know what I mean there.

I want to say Thank You for this thread. It's going to help me be a better person......of course I'll have to read through it several more times. I'll be smarter fer sure if I ever get done re-reading it. Seriously, I love this place. I love the open-mindedness of it all. Absolutely wonderful, very welcoming.

Thanks Autumn for starting this thread. You're gonna make me a better person........

hugs,
doll
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Old 09-16-2006, 11:41 AM
  # 84 (permalink)  
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One of the best parts of leaving the fight between good and evil behind was it freeing up my mind to think in terms of consequences of actions, reasoning and ethics.
This statement mistakenly assumes that ideas about good and evil eschews the use to the mind. That is, it divorces consequences, reasoning and ethics from morality.

That thought process does not hold up, logically. Indeed, I would call it a false dichotomy. Faith and logic are not diametrically opposed. They can live harmoneously together, and often do. More scientists believe in a G*D than not. In fact, scientists believe in G*D more than any other disciplinarians.
(And historians less than any other disciplines).

Growing is about keeping the mind open to new ideas. And yes, admitting sometimes that we are wrong.


Shalom!
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Old 09-18-2006, 09:17 AM
  # 85 (permalink)  
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Speaking only for myself --
I am secular; and, do not have a higher power. I did not require one.
An on line support group was useful to me at a point in the healing process.
I am one who had the problems; I am the one who had to solve them.
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Old 09-18-2006, 10:34 PM
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Good thinking and reasoning there, cas. I'm glad for you!

Shalom!
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Old 02-01-2007, 02:12 PM
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Hello everyone,

I'm new to soberrecovery.com and to this forum. But I am so glad I found it. I have so much to say, but I'll have to spill it all out one post at a time. Briefly, I am a 38-year-old African American woman, married, with a 13-year-old daughter and a three-year-old son.

I was raised in a very strict Christian, religious (holiness) family. We believed the bible was literal. We believed in all the heaven and hell stuff, the rapture, tribulation period, etc. My family was heavily involved in the church -- dad was a pastor, brother and brother-in-law are "elders", granddad is a deacon, etc.

When I was about 18, I "left the church", and went crazy. I think I tried to squeeze in every "thou shalt not" that I had been warned against from birth -- alcohol, weed, sex, etc. I ended up being a crackhead for two years.

When I got pregnant with my daughter in 1993, I stopped everything cold turkey and went back to the church. I stayed drug free for 11 years. I drank occasionally, but it wasn't a problem.

Sometime around year 2000, I started really questioning Christianity. All the things people have mentioned here, I thought about. I couldn't understand why I always felt worse when I left church than when I arrived. If Jesus said "come unto me all ye who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest", then where was the promised rest?

At first, I concluded that the problem wasn't with God and Jesus, the problem was with institutionalized region. I began doing lots of research, and eventually left the church. This was the happiest time of my life.

Then, I got pregnant in 2003, and sunk into a dark depression. I started drinking heavily, and in late 2004 started smoking crack again. The last two years have been pure hell. And during this time, I have moved from born again believer, to agnostic, naturalist, and now, atheist.

I am still drinking and still using coke about once a week. I want to stop, but I feel like I don't have the strength.

I am so glad I found this site. I knew there HAD to be other people out there like me, even though I never came across any in person.

I'll stop here for now. More later. Thanks to you all.
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Old 02-01-2007, 04:54 PM
  # 88 (permalink)  
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Welcome to SR ValLovely. You do have the strength. I know for me the key was finding a secular program to help me. A program that gave me the power over my life. I love the tools and program at SMART Recovery (http://www.smartrecovery.org ). I know others have found help at SOS and LifeRing.
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Old 02-02-2007, 10:32 PM
  # 89 (permalink)  
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Welcome ValLovely

I personally believe and have demonstrated ( by my own recovery ) that addiction recovery need not involve a HP of any form. Alera makes a good point. And I will go further: you have the innate ability to get and maintain sobriety. Addiction recovery is a skill that most anybody can learn. With courage, dedication, direction and persistence you can get sober.

Z.
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Old 02-06-2007, 08:13 AM
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With courage, dedication, direction and persistence you can get sober.
See, that's the problem. I am utterly lacking courage, dedication, direction, and persistence.
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Old 02-06-2007, 12:55 PM
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Originally Posted by ValLovely View Post
See, that's the problem. I am utterly lacking courage, dedication, direction, and persistence.

Val - that's not true. You're here, aren't you? That's a very courageous first step. You don't have to keep using. We're here to help.
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Old 02-08-2007, 10:47 AM
  # 92 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by ValLovely View Post
See, that's the problem. I am utterly lacking courage, dedication, direction, and persistence.
I used to think the same thing, until one day I said "no more" and posted my first time here. I then madea Beeline for SMART where I discovered I had the courage, dedication, direction and persistence.
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Old 02-14-2007, 11:48 AM
  # 93 (permalink)  
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I wish there were more AA alternatives like SMART out there; but it seems there's such a dearth of them after checking the links.

Sort of stuck in a death spiral of anxiety, depression, and drinking (still functioning, barely) and there are literally two AA meetings across the street from me, but I cant get myself to go because a lot of it just doesn't make sense. *sigh* I need something to make that serious leap and live a better life, but I can just can't see it in AA and the alternatives are few and far between so I'm kinda stumped. Ah well...back to lurking.

Last edited by thenewguy; 02-14-2007 at 12:14 PM.
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Old 02-14-2007, 06:37 PM
  # 94 (permalink)  
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Are there any treatment programs you can go to? The one I went to in 2005 was 12 step-based; however, just being in a place that I could not drink and drug for 30 days was very helpful - it helped break up the spiral I was in.

If you find yourself in a 12 step-based treatment program, I recommend being honest, but not confrontational, about your views . . . easier said than done.

Good luck.

Originally Posted by thenewguy View Post
I wish there were more AA alternatives like SMART out there; but it seems there's such a dearth of them after checking the links.

Sort of stuck in a death spiral of anxiety, depression, and drinking (still functioning, barely) and there are literally two AA meetings across the street from me, but I cant get myself to go because a lot of it just doesn't make sense. *sigh* I need something to make that serious leap and live a better life, but I can just can't see it in AA and the alternatives are few and far between so I'm kinda stumped. Ah well...back to lurking.
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Old 02-15-2007, 06:13 AM
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Hi new guy.

I find it hard to read your post.

I find it hard to know what to write.

I suppose I can write this. I called myself an alcoholic for many years before I was ready to acknowledge the fact. When I genuinely acknowledged that I was an alcoholic, I would take any help available.
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