Everything has changed, but everything's the same
Member
Join Date: Apr 2020
Posts: 110
Hi Ayers, I am also in my early sixties. My previous sober stint was also 2019. I feel like you do. Nothing is very exciting. That is ok though. Perhaps our minds need quiet equilibrium more than it needs excitement, elation, adrenaline or even happiness, whatever that may mean.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,172
Originally Posted by matilda123 
this! When quitting is the thing we want more than anything, I think the healing can begin.
Wanting to quit is different than hoping or wishing. And the difference is not that subtle.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2020
Location: Near the mountains
Posts: 1,542
Hi Ayers, thanks for posting. I can relate.
I think I got so accustomed to being so high or low that living in the middle ground became a foreign concept. Now I sit here on a regular Friday with nothing happening. No chaos. Sober and feeling great really. But feeling great has become normal. I used to relapse just to get back to the pink cloud, rinse and repeat. It's beautiful when we learn to just be instead of falling back into old habits. I think that's part of the process for me. It's not so much that I've detached from recovery, it's moving from actively trying to recover to being recovered in mind, body, and spirit.
Been following you for awhile. Congrats on your success!
I think I got so accustomed to being so high or low that living in the middle ground became a foreign concept. Now I sit here on a regular Friday with nothing happening. No chaos. Sober and feeling great really. But feeling great has become normal. I used to relapse just to get back to the pink cloud, rinse and repeat. It's beautiful when we learn to just be instead of falling back into old habits. I think that's part of the process for me. It's not so much that I've detached from recovery, it's moving from actively trying to recover to being recovered in mind, body, and spirit.
Been following you for awhile. Congrats on your success!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2024
Posts: 300
Originally Posted by Ayers
Unlike my previous sober stint, this time is different.
I never went through the pink cloud phase. I haven't experienced bursts of energy and inspiration like before that I wrote about and rejoiced in.
This time is calmer, steadfast, quiet, personal... but oh so real. It's a deeper knowledge. Almost like I've allowed my ancient soul to take over.
So, in effect, this time round is real. I'm dealing with reality. And some days I do feel chipper and able to post upbeat comments - but for the most part I feel...quite detached and uninvolved in my own recovery.
Am I the only one feeling this way?
I never went through the pink cloud phase. I haven't experienced bursts of energy and inspiration like before that I wrote about and rejoiced in.
This time is calmer, steadfast, quiet, personal... but oh so real. It's a deeper knowledge. Almost like I've allowed my ancient soul to take over.
So, in effect, this time round is real. I'm dealing with reality. And some days I do feel chipper and able to post upbeat comments - but for the most part I feel...quite detached and uninvolved in my own recovery.
Am I the only one feeling this way?
(Almost like I've allowed my ancient soul to take over.) I like that sentence and understand it and feel it also.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 1,290
Thanks Bunker, Dri guy, Five Tries and 424.
I remember while in the thick of things not being able to imagine going out for a walk or going to a yoga class. Even grocery shopping was a mammoth task.
After being quit for about 10 days I forced - literally forced myself to get out. It was a slog.
Until it wasn't anymore.
I knew by sticking to some kind of routine, I was doing the right thing. And I hate to cancel once I've commited to a group to do something - so that kept me going.
It has now become second nature and I'm first in line for an extra walk during the week. My walking and Parkruns on Saturdays have been a saving grace.
Bottom line to all those struggling ; force yourself as soon as you're able to change your routine and do something that you KNOW is good for you. Fake it till you make it and it becomes easier.
I did Parkrun yesterday. Skipped walk this am - my bunions hurt. Will walk again tomorrow.
Baking a Foccacia again today with olives and rosemary.
Yeah... allow your ancient soul to take over. It naturally steers you toward doing things that are good for you. We inherantly know what we should do.
Hugs to all of you xxx
I remember while in the thick of things not being able to imagine going out for a walk or going to a yoga class. Even grocery shopping was a mammoth task.
After being quit for about 10 days I forced - literally forced myself to get out. It was a slog.
Until it wasn't anymore.
I knew by sticking to some kind of routine, I was doing the right thing. And I hate to cancel once I've commited to a group to do something - so that kept me going.
It has now become second nature and I'm first in line for an extra walk during the week. My walking and Parkruns on Saturdays have been a saving grace.
Bottom line to all those struggling ; force yourself as soon as you're able to change your routine and do something that you KNOW is good for you. Fake it till you make it and it becomes easier.
I did Parkrun yesterday. Skipped walk this am - my bunions hurt. Will walk again tomorrow.
Baking a Foccacia again today with olives and rosemary.
Yeah... allow your ancient soul to take over. It naturally steers you toward doing things that are good for you. We inherantly know what we should do.
Hugs to all of you xxx
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
