novips

I have come to conclude that there is a type of alcoholic for whom the only solution is complete submission to the recovery program of Alcoholics Anonymous. I am one of those types. Feel free to PM me if you want to chat more about that.

DriGuy

I think we can make a case for an argument that as an alcoholic, the only drink you need to avoid it that first one. Think only in terms of the first drink. Forget about the benders and the Friday nights of cutting loose. Just don't take that first drink. I remember that old cycle I was in: "I can have just one drink without getting blotto, right?" It never worked. I actually pulled it off one time, but what followed was an evening of cravings and anxiety that made me angry and upset the whole time. It was worse than getting drunk. Well, Duh!?? That's what addiction is... being miserable without alcohol. Now, I don't even think about the first drink, and the fact that I don't makes me happy. Now I don't have to worry about getting drunk or having a miserable night after only one drink. When I was back in the cycle of addiction, both drinking and not drinking drove me nuts. That's all different now.

zoobadger

When I was in rehab we had lots of philosophical discussions about why we drink, and in-depth analysis of the twelve steps and other approaches to maintaining sobriety.

But one of our counselors probably put it best when she repeated, again and again "Don't pick up the first!"

I don't think willpower alone is sufficient. One needs to discover that sober life is its own reward. But when it comes to cravings - just don't pick up the first.

connop1

Thanks all. And it is indeed the case that I need to avoid that first one because the first always becomes the second and the third and the fourth and so on. And the nature of my drinking is such that having one and not a second is much, much harder to do than not having the first. I’m still at the stage of needing to learn how not to allow myself to get swept away in the thought that a couple of drinks won’t do any harm. Because it does. Yet somehow I manage to convince myself of this lie sometimes and I end up drinking. And wishing I hadn’t. I can’t remember the last time I had a drink I didn’t regret the next day. Even if I have a nice night, it still always feels the same the next day.

VikingGF

Until I was cognizant that the drinks were lies- I struggled, too. But if you sit down and really think about it, drinking is just that- lies and broken promises (you will feel better, be funnier, better-looking, on and on) and the lies- that you are in control, you can have just (enter number here) and stop, and on and on. Drinking is jail. It is a prison for our emotions, our talents, our dreams and our aspirations. It's a murderer- of our health, our motivation and our relationships. It ruins our self-worth, self-esteem and self-confidence. It dulls our minds, destroys our problem-solving and reasoning skills, and eventually, will suck our memories away, kill our organs.

The only way to defeat it is to not take that first sip. After that- all bets are off- and we are on the losing side. You can win though- you have all the control- what you do not put in your body cannot control you. Remember- one is too many and a hundred is not enough. There is only one answer to that conundrum- NONE.

Change the thoughts, change the behavior. It's work but it's worth it- and the good news is, it's not a struggle for long once you are convinced that sobriety is the reward.

Offthemast

Just took a picture of this post for my phone. Pretty well sums it up.