Grahamp1

Hi you invisible people,

I've had it I'm beat but can't think of living a life without the booze and the madness I'm lost...

Hevyn

Hi Grahamp - it's so good to have you with us.
I felt the same when I first came here - and many of us did. I can remember thinking life couldn't possibly be fun again. It's a lie we tell ourselves. I drank for decades. It was quite innocent in the beginning. I never imagined that I'd one day be completely dependent on it, drinking all day. I was numb & reckless in the end - nothing was enjoyable or rewarding.
I'm so thankful to be free of it. I hope you'll find this an encouraging & friendly place to be. We're glad you're here.

doggonecarl

Everybody who has achieved sobriety has thought they couldn't live without alcohol. But they did. I did. So can you.

Mummyto2

I have felt like that before, but it can be done, and you need never feel like that again, there is always hope.

Anna

Alcoholism is exhausting and you begin to believe that you can't live without it. That's a lie your AV is telling you. You can live a happy life without alcohol, and we're here to offer you support.

Surrendered19

Welcome Grahamp1. You deserve a peaceful, quiet and healthy life and you can have that. Unlace the gloves and walk away from the fight.

Dee74

Hi and welcome Grahamp1

I remember when I first came here I had my doubts that a site like this could help someone like me, someone so deep in the hole.

But this community did - and we can help you to get to where you want to be too.

D

DriGuy

I couldn't imagine a life without alcohol at one time. Well, not quite. I could imagine cutting back, and controlling my drinking, and maybe even only tying one on once a year, but it seemed like it would be unsatisfying and most of all, unnecessary. But removing alcohol from my life totally, was not under consideration.

There are some obvious problems with this kind of thinking. First, it's irrational (as in not rational), because an alcoholic cannot cut back or control. If he could, he WOULDN'T BE an alcoholic. Yes, I could imagine it, just like I can imagine I'm Batman. Second, I'm not sure if tying one on only once a year would be irrational, but it didn't make sense to me so imagining it was pointless.

When I finally threw in the towel and admitted I was powerless over alcohol, at least when I drank it, I decided to quit for good, and things changed in a hurry, almost over night. But it was a struggle getting to that decision. So when you ask, "How long did it take," it depends on "from when?" From when you wanted to get better? It could be 10 years... or never. There needs to be some defining moment when the light comes on. Mine was that decision, and the depth to which I understood and embraced it fully. That was when recovery began. It could be other defining moments for others.

But none of this is given to us on the wings of a magic swan that breaks from the flock and swoops down to deliver it to us. We do this on our own, and it has little to do with imagining. It is something we do.

Hawkeye13

Exactly what DriGuy said has been my experience too. Until I finally put down the Albatross of “someday I can drink just a little again safely” I was never safe and never at peace.

“From when” you take that decision to really quit for good, everything turns around pretty quick for many.

Amazing but true.

Glad you are with us!

least

Welcome to the family.

I couldn't imagine my life without drinking either. But I came to find out that I didn't miss it after I had been sober for a while, and my life was actually a lot better without it.

Sobriety isn't a punishment, it's a privilege.

LadyBug66

I had a hard time of thinking that I would never drink again too. I had to start at 1 day at a time and there were even moments where it was one minute at a time. Small goals helped me tremendously. You are here on SR and that is a great first step!

Steely

You will reach a stage, where far from believing you cannot live without the booze, you will wonder why you put yourself through such punishment.

Transformative experience, available to us all. Even you, and I.

I wouldn't go near it with a barge pole now, whereas once I owned the barge.

BornToBeSober

That's the drug alcohol tricking you. My guess is that you wouldn't be here unless alcohol has done a ton of damage to your life. Yet you are having a hard time thinking of living a life without it? Think about that for a second...

You can do this. Just take it one day at time. Everyone w significant clean time was where you are at one point.

Keep fighting. You'll find that it was worth in the end!

dustyfox

Being a drunk is no life really....try a sober one, I can tell you that it will surprise you.

DriGuy

Sobriety isn't a punishment, it's a privilege.

ShadowChick

I felt that too, I seriously couldn't imagine my life without alcohol, it seemed like another life and one that I certainly didn't want. But somehow I made it through. The storm seems to show no signs of ending, there seems to be no way out but there is always a way! When you come through the storm and see the sunshine things will start falling into place. It is hard but you can do it. x

VikingGF

We are not invisible and we SEE you- I have to say, I did LOL at your greeting. I'm glad you're here- we can never have enough funny people. I couldn't imagine life without alcohol either- but I didn't realize I didn't have much of a life with it. You can stop and you can have a better-quality life, too. First step is to stop drinking, then comes the rest. You can do it.

RecklessDrunk

I did not think a life without alcohol was possible. Many, many next mornings and days were filled with thoughts of how can I make sure my drinking does not get as out of hand as last night. Stop drinking all together just didn't register. Its a form of insanity. Its like how can I make sure my hand doesn't get burned but never thinking of not putting my hand on a hot stove.

I had to reach a pretty desperate place to even consider the possibility of a life without drinking. The thing is once I just gave up and decided to accept what life's consequences for me would be. Once I realized I wasn't in control of life. Once I got into an AA meeting and read the literature and it looked like much of it was written about me. It was like a load had come off of my shoulders. For me much of the anxiety I suffered from melted away pretty quickly once I accepted this way of life and could see a way to live it.

Zevin

Grahamp, we do see you and also UNDERSTAND you! How are you doing?

fishkiller

Welcome!